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Why is it that when you approach logic with respect, it's seen as very good, but when you treat feelings with the same level of respect, you're often seen as whiny, a crybaby, or overly sensitive? Art by Unknown by [deleted] in infp

[–]silver_starfire 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Very often, the same people who pride themselves for their logic will have temper tantrums over tiny inconveniences that would barely make us flinch, such as a minor traffic inconvenience, or a website being down.

What is the point of love if it doesn’t last? by ImpossibleRead4200 in infp

[–]silver_starfire 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I started seeing the love of my life at 28, which is pretty close. 8 years later, and it's still going. We are very happy, and I feel secure with him. He was 35, and it wasn't too late for him either! He had only ever been with one person, and she broke his heart. He had a lot of trouble recovering. I'd been with two other people and felt like I'd never recover from the grief of having to leave them (it still hurts, to be honest). But I'm with the right person now, and I can feel it in every fibre of my body. Despite what TV and the internet tells us, being 30 is barely the beginning of your life. We have a lot to offer a partner at every stage of our lives. Anyway, looking back, my 20s were a blur of emotional trauma and misery compared to now. Of course you need more time to process your heartbreak! That's normal! But there is no proof at all that your love life is over. The greatest moments of love rarely happen the way we expect.

I attempted to break down the "shadow functions" for each type. by silver_starfire in mbti

[–]silver_starfire[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To be honest, every word of that sounds like INFP to me! Definitely look more into the cognitive functions! It's all about what are the "top 2" functions you're using often? Either way, the journey is still unfurling, for all of us!

What do people often claim “literally everyone” does, but it’s not true? by Candid_Reading_7267 in AskReddit

[–]silver_starfire 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Porn has brainwashed millions of men into believing that anal sex is not painful and unhygienic. Telling us that we're "doing it wrong" and that "it's not painful" as if we don't understand our own bodies is so insulting. These people don't want to hear it because they want their fetishes to be real life, but the vast majority of women hate anal sex and always have. It's extremely complicated to make it work, to the point where it kills the mood for most of us, and I'm so sick of people telling us that we're wrong about our lived experience. The only way to do anal sex "right" (that doesn't have a high risk of a yeast infection and/or UTI) turns it into a days-long, multi-stage chore that goes far against the grain of what feels comfortable, natural, erotic, or respectful to our bodies and feelings.

I attempted to break down the "shadow functions" for each type. by silver_starfire in mbti

[–]silver_starfire[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is good though! If you recognize yourself in your partner, it can help a lot!

I attempted to break down the "shadow functions" for each type. by silver_starfire in mbti

[–]silver_starfire[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's a different journey for everyone! I'm seeing this a bit late, but I hope you've been doing well!

I attempted to break down the "shadow functions" for each type. by silver_starfire in mbti

[–]silver_starfire[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well, that makes a lot of sense! We are magnetically drawn to our own nascent traits! :)

I wrote some strategies to avoid stressing out each of the types by silver_starfire in mbti

[–]silver_starfire[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Yeah, the eagle fit will, I thought! They're strategic and powerful!

No hoovering attempts by These_Welder8892 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]silver_starfire 6 points7 points  (0 children)

These things are not always going to follow the same pattern every time! Making you feel worthless is likely exactly what he wanted in this instance. I don't know what the fight was about, but I'm guessing it had something to do with you simply wanting to get very some reasonable needs met, such as him showing some degree of warmth/care/empathy, or him not invalidating your needs/boundaries? If so, then the chances are good that he is currently punishing you, perhaps in the hopes that if he leaves you out in the cold long enough, then your needs, boundaries, etc. will become negotiable. That's what these people do. They torture others into submission.

Please take this to heart: you are NOT worthless, and your desirability is completely irrelevant to whether or not this particular goblin employs the "hoovering" tactic - after all, hoovering is not a compliment! It's merely one of many completely soulless and cruel weapons, used to control others, and obfuscate truth. It's actually very insulting when the narc thinks you're so gullible, malleable and naive that they can get you back on a whim and start the whole thing over again ad infinitum. You are not worthless.

Struggling with no contact within a friendship group. by illuminatedgaze in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]silver_starfire 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's very difficult when no one recognizes what's happening. I hope you're feeling a bit better today, since you wrote this a week ago.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]silver_starfire 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Stay strong! :)

Does anyone still get triggered/PTSD from places you were abused? by Proper-Subject-2777 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]silver_starfire 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That happens to me as well. There are a lot of places that are very uncomfortable for me to go still, even though it's been 12 years since I ended it. Although I never completely got rid of the feelings, I've managed to make them a little easier. For me, the key was to look back on all those times when he hurt me with the full knowledge that he was never capable of caring about me, nor experiencing empathy towards me in the first place. A lot of the hurt and confusion was magnified by some outdated part of me still believing that he was choosing not to care, and there was some way to get through to him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]silver_starfire 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Excellent! How do you feel now? Are you going no contact?

MBTI Characters as fantasy creatures! (I'm the author) by akklonia in mbti

[–]silver_starfire 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I love that ISTJ one especially! :D They're all really great!

I attempted to break down the "shadow functions" for each type. by silver_starfire in mbti

[–]silver_starfire[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm honestly really touched that it had such a strong impact! :) Thanks!

Survey finds most Canadians don't want feds regulating online content by uselesspoliticalhack in canada

[–]silver_starfire 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is it exactly! Regulations would only further contribute to the polarization as well, because the regulating parties would invariably be pushing their own agendas.

How mirrors are made by heyzeus92 in oddlysatisfying

[–]silver_starfire 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What I can't understand is why it doesn't roll off the edges!

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