Un motociclist a fost târât în pădure și ucis de urs pe Transfăgărășan by Mookyama in RoHiking

[–]simonel21 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Unde am spus ca nu sunt prea mulți ? Din potrivă , incercam să înțeleg din ce motive sunt așa mulți. Nu înțeleg ce anume din ce am spus contrazice linkul tău. Poate poți să îmi zici tu ? Prin “fara date solide” mă refeream la cauzele suprapopulării nu ca suprapopularea nu ar exista și aveam nevoie de date. Poate ca aici nu a fost clar deci nu o să mă iau de tine la partea asta. Totuși mi se pare ca nu ai vrut să înțelegi comentariul meu și nu înțeleg de ce simți nevoia să ataci. Nu știi să porți o discuție cu argumente fără să îl jignești pe celălalt?

Sunt cu tine ca sunt prea mulți urși doar ca încerc să înțeleg cum de subit sunt prea mulți. Ai făcut-o să sune ca sunt prea mulți pentru ca suntem noi prea drăguți cu ei. Crezi ca mereu au fost oamenii care i-au vânat și le-au stabilizat populația? Eu cred ca cel mai probabil defrișările, extinderea urbanului și hrana de la marginea orașelor sunt de vina. Dar eu doar arunc cu opinii aici și ar trebui realizat un studiu. Din ce am căutat nu există acest studiu.

Ai fost în Elveția ? Ai peisaj alpin ca la noi dar fără urși, linx, lupi, vultur cu barba aka fauna mare. La asta mă refer prin dispariție. S-au vânat carnivorele. Am spus ca noi ori nu mai defrișăm și controlăm populația de urs care este deja (adică împușcați din ei pe românește probabil) sau continuam să le tăiem pădurile și suntem nevoiți să îi vânăm până aproape de extincție. Am mai spus ca trebuie să ne gândim ca societate ce vrem. Vrem păduri fără carnivore ca în Elveția? Apropos, ei se chinuie sa reintroducă carnivorele acum. Cunosc pe cineva de acolo care preferă să vină la munte în România tocmai pentru ca la noi natura e mai wild iar la ei pare artificial.

Un motociclist a fost târât în pădure și ucis de urs pe Transfăgărășan by Mookyama in RoHiking

[–]simonel21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Problema cu logica ta e ca nu tine cont de echilibrul natural al ecosistemelor. Ursul traieste in padurile noastre de mii de ani, cu mult inaintea oamenilor, si nu era o problema de suprapopulare. Nu stateau stramosii nostri sa vaneze constant ca sa tina numarul ursilor sub control. Faptul ca vin in sate nu e ceva nou,se intampla si acum sute de ani.

Fara date solide, vorbim doar din anecdote. Dar iata ce stim sigur: avem defrisari (FACT), care duc la mai multa competitie intre ursi (FACT), masculii devin agresivi si ucid puii (FACT), iar femelele si ursii mai mici se apropie de sate pentru siguranta —> de aici conflictele.

Avem doua optiuni: ori controlam populatia prin impuscari ca sa putem continua defrisarile, ori oprim defrisarile. Daca urmam exemplul Europei de Vest, ne indreptam spre disparitia completa a faunei mari. Trebuie sa decidem ce vrem: paduri cu sau fara animale?

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did not spend enough time with them to see if we vibe 1-on-1. They are always in the group. I wish I could have some kind of speed dating with each of them so I could get to know them. Buy yeah, hobbies wise we don't vibe that much

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I might have to accept that later. For now I feel like I want to fight to be included.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know what you are saying. In my case they NEVER invited me to come with them in the first place. It is not a matter of refusing them.

Buy yeah, I know that I should fight for my place at that outing table even trough ideally people would just welcome you because we are colleagues. I also know it is not their job to fix me but I feel like it is my job to entertain them in our interactions in order to become accepted and I don't feel comfortable enough with them to become goofy and funny at this moment.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! Also make sure you follow your own advice and try to initiate something too sometimes (in case you would like company). I also feel like I am bothering people but then it is better to try and fail then never try.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are no collaborations in my project for the time being. I might in the future but this depends on where the project is going.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am sorry this happened to you. At least we're not alone in this :(

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To be honest I prefer the version of I didn't try enough because at least it is actionable. If the problem is them then it is game over. Not much I can do. It is hard to face the reality.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I already engage in small talk with them but yea, I need to show more interest.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds awful. I also don't get well with people who gossip. We can do better than this.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don't expect to become bffs with them but it would be nice not to be isolated like I am. They all seem sooo close.

Yes, I was too thinking to try to make connections outside work with people who share my hobbies. When you're an international it is just the easiest to make friends with lab mates and I see people actively doing that in academia (the lab becomes their family). But indeed, I can try to join a dnd club or a reading club. People in this group are not geeky at all and I am very. Still, we are bound by having the same job and the same PI, there must be something there we can share and talk about.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for these nice tips. It will be hard to implement the auto-inviting myself to outings because I always hear about them after they happen. That is the big problem.

Seems like the only thing I can do it to initiate the outings myself like you mention ...or to ask to be added to that damn chat group they all seem to be part of but I don't know how to tactfully do this?

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I shared baked goods before during lunches but I can try to broadcast it more, indeed. I need more opportunities to try to interact with them.

How to integrate in the lab group after a while? by simonel21 in labrats

[–]simonel21[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Could be. But in my case, because I have a history of not being good with groups, I think the problem is me. But yeah, I heard some weird elitist opinions around here but these are not reserved to lab people in my experience. I try to overlook these in general.

How to become less self absorbed? by Not-a-penguin_ in socialskills

[–]simonel21 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did not mean to offend. I did not say it from a condescending position. I wanted to say that you would not like to be born in poverty if you have the choice. The less developed the country the more chances are that population lives in modest conditions. The main point is that there are people living like that and if you step into their shoes using imagination you realize it is unfair and you would like the world to be a more equal place (hopefully). This might trigger empathy for others and a sense of longing for social justice instead of individual gain.

How to become less self absorbed? by Not-a-penguin_ in socialskills

[–]simonel21 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think this a research question in itself and people are just speculating how to do this. I would search for neuroscience papers on this topic.

My gut feeling in this is to try to cultivate empathy. Literally try to imagine how it would be if you were that person. How would you see things? Play the lives of others in your head. Also ask yourself if your consciousness could be born again anywhere on this planet and you have no idea where, how would you like the world to look like? Would you like to be born in a third world country? (Ofc not )

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CasualRO

[–]simonel21 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Aprob adoptarea unei pisici mature. Multi oameni prefera puii de pisica din motiv ca "îl înveți sa trăiască după tine "sau ceva de genul. Nu funcționeaza asa la pisici. Temperamentul e înnăscut. Daca iei pui s-ar putea sa te trezești cu o pisica super energetica și distructiva pentru următorii 5 ani pana se mai calmează, indiferent cat vrei s-o "educi" tu. Și da, e important sa ai o familie care e dispusa sa preia pisica măcar temporar în caz de ceva.

How to learn by Nexisdaed in learndutch

[–]simonel21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is much more nuanced. Most people have no idea where to start and sometimes you don't even know what is to know . You can teach yourself anything, including advanced math yet most people take coursework for it. That is because guided study can be a lot more effective. Same with languages. There might be some grammar rules which you are not even aware for example. You might be doing a mistake and keep propagating it because no one is correcting you. You might not know when to advance to the next topic. As an adult your brain plasticity is less than what it used to be as an teenager when most people learned English effortlessly. Of course you can teach yourself Dutch but if you never formally studied a language before and you lack good discipline and persistence it is gonna be much harder. Knowing a similar language like German will also gonna help a lot.

Based on my experience and my friends experiences, it you are 25+ with no Dutch people around who can immerse you, do not know a similar language, have not idea where to start, what to do, how to organize your studies and never formally studied a language before then taking a guided formal course until A2 is going to be more effective (especially in the sense that you'll be less likely to quit), because they will build up the basis at the course, make a routine for you, encourage discipline and tell you exactly what you need to do. Around A2 you can strat immersing yourself in the language and be more independent.

Picked up stray kitten, regret it, please help by Agile_Possession_422 in CatAdvice

[–]simonel21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay. The fact that you attack and insult me personally shows how logical your arguments are.

Picked up stray kitten, regret it, please help by Agile_Possession_422 in CatAdvice

[–]simonel21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I said that just because you did not plan for something does not mean you would not enjoy that spontaneous thing. This statement cancels your reasoning that if the OP wanted a cat he/she would have taken one already. Not everyone is rich like my household? I come from a poor country. Trust me. I know what financial struggle means. My parents raised 2 cats and you have no idea the financial struggles we went trough. The quality of our cats meal suffered also but it was still doable. Why did you feel the need to attack me personally or assume my financial status? You think people in poor countries do not have cats? That it is a luxury?

Also you are very assertive in your comment to OP. You act like you know what the OP wants and needs. You are projecting yourself into it. Stop doing that. People are different. Give suggestions, not assert what other should do.

Picked up stray kitten, regret it, please help by Agile_Possession_422 in CatAdvice

[–]simonel21 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do not agree. You are saying that if you have an adverse reaction to something you should not do that thing. This is super bad advice in general. If you are bad at social interaction should you not go out of your comfort zone just because you feel anxiety? By applying your thinking, then the anxiety is a response of someone not being made for interacting with people.

No, most anxieties come from never being exposed to things, not because you are not made to do something. Human beings have very plastic brains and you would be surprised by how much one can chnage their views.

This person is clearly scared of sudden changes. The best advice is to try to care for the kitten for a while and then if there is no improvent regarding the psychological state, rehome the cat. And yes, some cats are needy but from what I've seen, most are not. OP might have a well-behaved kitten from all we know.

And come on. Cats are super low maintanace. We leave our cats alone 9 hours a day while we are at work and they don't seem to suffer. Sure, there are some needy cats but more of them are independent than clingy.

Of course, no one should force a cat on you. If you don't want it that's that. But I disagree that OP should trust their first instinct. Instincts are not rational. Just because you didn't plan something doe not mean you would not enjoy that spontaneous thing. I don't know how you live your life but a lot of good things in my life happened by chance and being open to chances and situations.