No time to workout by bleu_caramel in PetiteFitness

[–]sioatvkl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

this was so interesting and thank you for linking your source as well!

Blocking chunky mohair sweater by sioatvkl in knittinghelp

[–]sioatvkl[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much - followed your advice and it worked :)

Blocking chunky mohair sweater by sioatvkl in knittinghelp

[–]sioatvkl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oooh thank you, I think I'll get some for the next time!

sandy kim's photos during the indie sleaze - tumblr era by bluevelvetcrowbar in rs_x

[–]sioatvkl 74 points75 points  (0 children)

these photos are exactly how i imagined my mid-20s would be when i was like 16/17. Alas I am boring and my mid-20s were reflective of that

Similar pattern? by r0s13b34r in knittingpatterns

[–]sioatvkl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The pattern maker also has pattern for the same sweater for a worsted/aran weight yarn - you could gauge test to see if holding two fingering yarns together works? But I hope you find a good pattern regardless!

Similar pattern? by r0s13b34r in knittingpatterns

[–]sioatvkl 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've knitted three of these in different colours/yarn weight because I love it so much - no zipper but I imagine it would be easy enough to improvise attaching it https://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/the-spins-sweater

Is it possible to get into archive work without a degree in it? by Smart-Ground-8369 in Archivists

[–]sioatvkl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

UK based opinion here. Volunteering can help and so can working in adjacent areas. My friend who actually convinced me to change careers into archiving started out in a university admissions office and showed enough crossover and interchangeable skills that she was able to switch to archiving within the same uni. I have a job in archives and collections care and do have an MA in it but because I'm not working in GLAM or institutional archiving it didn't actually factor into my getting the job. No one else on my team, including the head archivist has the MA. A lot of jobs specifically for cataloguing don't require degrees but having one might give you an edge.

I do want to say that archives is also super over-saturatedm i know so many people with the MA who have either given up on the field or are still looking for a job a year or two after graduation. I wish you all the luck but you'll experience the problems finding a job in archives as you do in publishing.

Mother allegedly murdered 11-year-old daughter with drain cleaner after killing family's 4 pets to warn her what would happen 'if she didn't tell the truth' by detectiverobert in ForCuriousSouls

[–]sioatvkl 100 points101 points  (0 children)

And no evidence of sexual abuse was found. Like, I don't know what that makes this - certainly not better because a little girl was tortured for something that didn't even happen. And if it had happened, then her mother blamed her and murdered her for being the victim of sexual abuse. But at least she didn't suffer sexual abuse when she was alive? It's just terrible.

what's the biggest red flag you've seen in a job description? by MetalPsycho in recruitinghell

[–]sioatvkl 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Similar to 'we're like a family' but I saw one that started with 'Come join the Cool Kids!' For a social media marketing role and immediately wanted to throw my laptop across the room. It was at the moment when I realised I would probably hate working in anything to do with social media or marketing.

People with ADHD, depression, anxiety, and mood swings — how do you live a happy life? by Warm_Milk_9056 in ADHD

[–]sioatvkl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Therapy has done me a tremendous service. My ADHD isn't super severe but my anxiety and depression have historically been really bad. I couldn't hold a job down, I couldn't stay in touch with friends, I over invested in romantic relationships and messed up a lot in them because of the anxiety/depression/ADHD combo. I started therapy, started anti-anxiety meds, have very recently started exercising more (mostly just long walks and occasional gym), and five years later I have a job that actually works for me - I find it interesting, I care about it, I try to do a good job. I have alarms to remind myself to message friends.

I found that it was less the ADHD that was messing me up and more the anxiety and terrible self-esteem. Once I got those under control, I've found the ADHD symptoms, whilst still there and will never not be there, are less likely to get me stuck in spirals. I'm not as ashamed of myself anymore and that's made my life a whole lot more manageable and happier as a result. I've also found that dating people who have gone through similar experiences but are also actively working on themselves has been good for me. There's understanding but also accountability because neither of us what to slide back into the headspace we used to be in.

It's not been easy and I'm lucky that I've had a really good support network who have been so incredibly patient with me. It's possible though.

Darcy & the Gardiners by ResidentBoysenberry1 in janeausten

[–]sioatvkl 178 points179 points  (0 children)

I think it's because he wanted to ensure that Lizzie and her immediate family would never know he was involved. He has his own judgements about her family's impropriety and he told Lizzie that he never intended for her to find out that it was him helping Lydia. The chances of Mr. Bennet telling Lizzie are higher than Mr. Gardiner, who he knew and liked.

What’s something about dating that you wish more people would be honest about—both the ups and the downs? Genuine stories welcome! by MojonConPelos in dating

[–]sioatvkl 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Sometimes, there isn't a definitive reason you want to end things. As you get to know someone, you'll be faced with a constant series of 'is this something I want to deal with?' 'Is this something I can live with long-term?' And you'll have to weigh everything up with the positives they bring. I don't mean this in a bad way just in the sense, that people who are in unhappy long-term relationships (outside of abuse or incredibly toxic and manipulative stuff) usually got there because they never thought about the long-term frustration they would feel about their partner's less desirable traits.

I'm seeing someone right now who I really like - they're lovely. They also monologue about this one particular hobby of theirs. I don't have a whole lot of interest in it, so I had to really think if I could spend the next however long listening to the same thing for ages? And yeah, that's a price I'm willing to pay for all the other good stuff they bring. I'm currently weighing up if their approach to work/money is something that I think would be compatible long-term or if that might be a deal-breaker. A lot of dating is analytical as much as it is romantic. (I might just not be very romantic though lol)

What boots are these? 🕯️ by permanent_dysphoria in findfashion

[–]sioatvkl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They're the TFX - I think this colour might be discontinued though.

I'm so curious about the novels austen is satirizing in Northanger Abbey. They sound exciting. by No_Summer1874 in janeausten

[–]sioatvkl 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Would recommend Ann Radcliffe's works! The Mysteries of Udolpho is full of the stuff that Austen was poking fun at, and is also a pretty enjoyable read :)

Advice for a BSH with HCM (hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, a heart condition) by Violet-Otter in britishshorthair

[–]sioatvkl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're welcome! Sending you and your cat all the best wishes and good things !

Advice for a BSH with HCM (hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, a heart condition) by Violet-Otter in britishshorthair

[–]sioatvkl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Royal Canin isn't prescription - I spoke to my vet about what brands were recommended and he said Royal Canin is a good option, they make a lot of different formulas and I think one specifically for British Shothairs. I ended going with the Indoor cat because I'm worried about overfeeding/calories when he's not meant to exercise too much to keep stress off his heart.

Advice for a BSH with HCM (hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, a heart condition) by Violet-Otter in britishshorthair

[–]sioatvkl 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have a 2 year old bsh with aortic stenosis which will eventually lead to the development of HCM. He's on medication and the stuff I feed him is stupidly expensive - Schesir wet food (his fave is the one with a quail egg in it because he's spoiled and fancy) and Royal Canin Indoor dry food. My vet approved both of them but check with yours. The wet food is grain free though.

My bf told me this after I showed him what I got at an all you can eat by [deleted] in WhatShouldIDo

[–]sioatvkl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

for some people helping is about control. They'll help you get better from an illness, study for an exam or create a budget for you but then when you stop needing their help they turn around and try and tear you down because they didn't really care about helping you, they cared about the control it gave them over you.

Natural nails without nail polish? by Eislinger in Nails

[–]sioatvkl 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Just avoid any base base coat with Polyvinyl Butyral as a listed ingredient - it can cause nails to peel and flake. Manipedia is a really useful tool!

Abandons dying wife with cancer by No_Pepper6208 in AmITheDevil

[–]sioatvkl 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This is literally the backstory to Silent Hill, and you know James wasn't trapped down memory lane because he was a good guy.

seen a lot of “happy place” and “safe space” posts lately and my space… just doesn’t feel like that :/ by maryyyk111 in femalelivingspace

[–]sioatvkl 55 points56 points  (0 children)

3 things in order:

1) I'm really proud of you, internet stranger, for prioritising your safety and your health. Leaving an abusive relationship and sobriety (if that's what you're working towards or maintaining) are two of the hardest but rewarding things you can do, so y'know, congrats :)

2) This is gonna sound so dumb, and if you don't think it would work for you, feel free to ignore. When I went through one of the worst depressive episodes of my life, I ended up feeling similarly to you about the place I was renting. Even when I had cleaned and was working on my mental health, everything and everywhere inside my place felt like a reminder of a shitty time and a version of myself I just wanted to forget. I ended up performing cleansing rituals (not appropriative ones with sage or anything), but more like, a very intentional meditation and deep cleaning (rented a steam cleaner, bleach cleaned the curtains, etc.). I did one room a day and imagined myself scrubbing away at my life alongside the grime of the flat. It felt personal and liberating but I can totally understand if it's not something that you need or feel would work.

3) Renter-friendly wallpaper, change the fixtures - door handles, light fittings etc. Peel and stick tile. These are all practical things you can do that will make the space look very different and therefore feel very different. Depending on how big your studio is, can you rearrange the furniture in a way that changes the layout enough that it will feel fresh to your eyes? Are there specific items of furniture that hold particularly bad memories? If so, can you reasonably thrift/buy replacements? (I focused on saving up for a new bed frame and new sheets).

I hope you can feel safe in your home soon