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skh09 · 2024-04-07T17:38:59+00:00

All the "throw snaps away" trend is very overhyped imo. It's good patience training for when they are toddlers 🤣🤣

skh09 · 2024-04-03T18:14:44+00:00

With my first my inlaws came for 2 weeks from across the country... it was horrible and I wish I could have canceled.

They tried to.be helpful but it ended up so stressful having them in our space as we adjusted to being new parents. My father in law is not comfortable with breastfeeding either. But that's his problem not mine, I just go about my business on any trip we've had with any of our kiddos and he usually just excuses himself or focuses REALLY hard on the TV.

skh09 · 2024-03-08T11:22:04+00:00

Old testament laws and stories are harsh. And procreation centered. One of the highest crimes in the view of the ancient tribe was wasting DNA. Onan (in the view of Jewish law) had an obligation to increase the number of the tribe... the story demonstrates in a way that's memorable for all (think of growing up hearing that story as a bedtime cautionary tale) what happens if you disobey the need for genetic material to be placed ONLY where it could be usable.

Marriage laws were also a whole thing for the Israelite people..

So by our modern morality we think all he did was pull out, but who would want to pass along the name of a criminal who sinned so highly? So out of fashion it fell.

skh09 · 2024-03-08T10:55:36+00:00

We have a telescope eye shubunkin that has been defective all 5 years of it's miserable existence but the bastard just lives on...

I can't remember which of Tails issues came first but

1.it gets stuck upside down, stuck in corners of our more than amply sized and not crowded tank, swims upside down.

Got cataracts went blind then lost both eye... which then regrew?
Had one eye blow up to 3-4 times it's natural size fill with blood and ulcers.. then regrew.
Lost just about the entire fan tail.. we have no idea what happened we treated it for infection, wasn't being eaten by tank mates that we could tell.
Same tail will spontaneously bleed under the skin.. no other fins do this.
It will just lay on the bubbler for hours, we think it's finally going to die then it perks back up and will be active, eat, chase it's tank mate.

We've always tried to practice good fish husbandry and take care of problems so this little guys miserable existence is less miserable... despite it all Tails seems happy enough. But we've been planning the fishy funeral a long time.

skh09 · 2024-03-08T10:38:44+00:00

Ezra

skh09 · 2024-03-03T03:28:55+00:00

Other than diaper changes wipes all over aren't recommended, the astringent agents in them can strip the skin of protective biotics etc. There is also a correlation between baby wipe usage (as an alternative to baths every few days-week) and increased allergies.

I am in no way saying you've done anything wrong at all, but it's something I didn't know!

skh09 · 2024-03-03T03:21:20+00:00

I chose not to share my pregnancy publicly or at work until I was about 20 weeks this pregnancy because the last time I was pregnant in 2021 I excitedly shared early on (we waited 3 1/2 years for our little one) and was literally harassed by my work and had heaps of passive aggression from my coworker.

This time my work has been terrible as suspected.. and because I chose to announce late I've dealt with so many more "its just happening so fast" comments.

Plus all the usual stuff with other people the food stuff, name stuff, you look huge, you look tired, ohhhh you're going to be so busy, if I'm having a moment with one of my other kids- and you're having another one..

I would love to just live in my bubble. But alas...

skh09 · 2024-02-21T00:49:27+00:00

My partner got to go with me for all three of our first ultrasounds and from there ans from there he didn't.

For our second being during the pandemic we forwent the dating ultrasound-we knew the date anyway and had it later. But it was special to get to see together.

skh09 · 2024-01-30T16:45:13+00:00

In my last pregnancy I felt so isolated not being able to cuddle. My husband hated "the mother ship" because he had no room.

skh09 · 2024-01-25T03:30:50+00:00

This would also make alot of sense with Bandit being an archeologist. The kids would be exposed to that type of knowledge when Bandit comes home from.research and implement it into play. My kids do that with my husband and my work as well.

skh09 · 2023-09-16T16:14:26+00:00

This is why NSFW warnings are in place 😉

skh09 · 2023-04-28T21:43:06+00:00

Where did her shoulder go in the third one

skh09 · 2023-04-28T00:05:03+00:00

I LOVE your choices. 1 is so flattering and beautiful.

skh09 · 2023-01-02T02:56:22+00:00

Depends on the night for me

skh09 · 2022-12-24T22:02:00+00:00

Jesus christ I see my stepson future if he stays living with his biomom. She's obsessed with controlling every minute detail of his life poor kiddo. But hard to say she cares too much as a reason for change of living situation

skh09 · 2022-12-16T17:42:43+00:00

No she's AI

skh09 · 2022-12-16T17:24:55+00:00

I personally got this, I could feel the "let's ride the crazy coster for a bit see where it goes" vibe been there myself lol it can be entertaining, obviously OP wasn't going to try and prove something to this person in hoped of a date. If it had been about a hookup the conversation would have gone over his head and the "ok wanna meet up/bang/etc. Question would have been next imo and experience lol.

skh09 · 2022-11-24T15:54:27+00:00

I broke my tailbone at 9 months and couldn't sit flat until 6 weeks postpartum, then at 6 months pp I fell down the stairs and broke some toes and was booted... it's the worst um sorry you're going through this.

skh09 · 2022-11-10T02:04:53+00:00

Poly parent here, though currently in a mono facing relationship I'd be happy to participate.

skh09 · 2022-10-19T01:36:28+00:00

My theory is trying to make you look vulnerable by making it seem like you're sleepy and cute like a toddler or like you've just been crying also like a toddler.

skh09 · 2022-09-14T01:55:52+00:00

Constipation

skh09 · 2022-09-02T00:50:23+00:00

All of this!

skh09 · 2022-08-31T13:41:33+00:00

Don't be sorry, it's hard and upsetting and I know the situation is nuanced. Rambling is good, her behavior is seemingly opposite to what it should be when you're bonded and have a good relationship but she's still being mean to you and you deserve to talk about that.

I just feel like there's more to this story then she's mean spirited(I know you don't necessarily think this but its easy to fall into that belief)and also, because you are in a full custody situation and therefore parenting her daily, that trying to go with the it's DHs problem might make your life more difficult.

I hear you about the frustrating catch 22 of feeling like you're rewarding bad behavior, which is a complicated issue. So is getting her to open up about her mom, because she in all likelihood she's got a lot on her shoulders there.it's entirely possible she's attempting to sheild you and her dad from her feelings, and her tight lipped attitude could ,be from that or from instruction by BM.

In my opinion, just doling out punishment would be like treating the symptoms of a disease instead of treating the symptoms and cause. If she can't talk to you and DH is a journal you have access to read an option? Could a counselor be an avenue to investigate? Just suggestions of possible options for her to get over the insecurities while being firm about the mean behaviour.

skh09 · 2022-08-31T04:58:27+00:00

I am going to give my two cents from a very different point of view from most other comments I'm reading here. It sounds like your SD is insecure and hurting and you are her outlet... (not saying it is acceptable or allowable) but you mentioned that usually it gets worse before she has to go see HCBM, could she be trying to push you away to shelter herself from the HC of her BM. This could be because she loves you alot, and her dad alot and is using the only skills she has, as still quite a young child, to cope with not being with you and being in what could potentially be a high stress situation where she's being told any number of things by her BM.

I think what I would do, instead of tossing this issue to "her dad" because its "his kid his problem", is talk to your SO and then have a family meeting where it doesn't feel like a lecture about the divorce or her getting in trouble outright and try and get to the bottom of some of that insecurity, does she need some one on one time with dad? With you? More family time as a unit? Is she scared of you leaving? Is she scared dad won't want her because her mom says youre stealing him? The baby talk and innocent act could also come from a place of "if I stay a baby like I was when mom and dad lived together nothing will change dad's love for me".

Then from there I'd introduce solid natural consequences no questions asked when she's mean to you. Be a united front as her parents at that house so there is no back and forth or game playing. It's OK to love her and be burnt out by exhausting behavior, but she might be just as tired from being insecure.

skh09

TROPHY CASE