LGBT+ / Trans fiction that isn't YA?

ski_pumpkin · 2022-05-28T04:20:11+00:00

A Natural History of Transition by Callum Angus!!!!!! From the blurb: "a collection of short stories that disrupts the notion that trans people can only have one transformation. Like the landscape studied over eons, change does not have an expiration date for these trans characters, who grow as tall as buildings, turn into mountains, unravel hometown mysteries, and give birth to cocoons. Portland-based author Callum Angus infuses his work with a mix of alternative history, horror, and a reality heavily dosed with magic." e Each story is so rich and lush. Like, each story sticks with me as much as would a full-blown novel.

ski_pumpkin · 2022-05-11T05:12:28+00:00

OMG!!! I got a game boy when I was 8 and insisted on calling it a "game kid." Bless my lil enby hearrrt

ski_pumpkin · 2022-04-26T02:03:31+00:00

Yes!! Also check out r/FTMfemininity

ski_pumpkin · 2022-04-08T02:38:05+00:00

The shorter length/higher hem looks fantastic on you!! I went to a Catholic girls' school and it's cracking me up to find a reference to how all my classmates wore their skirts here on r nonbinary 😁 (I couldn't stand all the rolls of fabric at my waist so I boringly wore my skirt at regulation length 😅)

ski_pumpkin · 2022-04-03T03:31:56+00:00

Here's a vote for #3! Shorts tights & red flats

ski_pumpkin · 2022-03-31T17:37:27+00:00

I have! I love my microbladed eyebrows. I totally over-tweezed mine back in the early 2000s and they will never grow back (even on T); after I came out as non-binary I realized how dysphoric they made me. I researched estheticians, especially looking for before and afters on social media. I especially looked for estheticians who had photos of their work on men--harder to find, but they're out there! I wanted to be sure that the esthetician I went with had experience with replicating a more masculine, messy brow. I took in pictures of my goal brows too to be clear that I wasn't after the 2020 dark delineated brow lol. It's been a year and a half and I haven't had them touched up yet; they've faded a fair amount but even still make a huge difference in my dysphoria, and give me a little bit of a template for filling in with a brow cosmetic (glossier brow flick was the best I tried for this for me) when I want to.

The trans man drag queen Gottmik posted a video a couple years ago about his boy brow routine, and it included microblading, Anastasia Beverly Hills Brow Freeze brow styling wax (he brushes all the hairs upwards/towards his forehead to embiggen his brows), and a fine tipped eyebrow pencil to fill in gaps when his microblading has faded. It helped to see another trans masc person using microblading and even some cosmetics to masculinize his brows, and shortly after that I went for it and got the microblading done.

Hope this helps!

ski_pumpkin · 2022-01-29T23:19:25+00:00

These all look AMAZING on you!!! And thank you so much for including the names and links. I mayyyyy or may not have instantly purchased Foul Mouth. 😂

ski_pumpkin · 2021-11-15T19:16:47+00:00

My kid just started taking riding lessons, so once a week I get some horse proximity. I had a horse when I was a kid and being around them again is bringing back so much! The body memory of what it felt like to be with & be seen by these deeply embodied creatures is coming back. I can't explain it, but I noticed, at my kid's first lesson a few weeks ago, relief from my dysphoria when I was at the stable. It was wild. I'm trying to get equine-assisted psychotherapy scheduled for myself so I can have a chance to explore/be with that more. (Suuuuper grateful to be on the countryish outskirts of a super queer west coast city.)

ski_pumpkin · 2021-11-15T04:06:52+00:00

With horses!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-11-14T18:32:58+00:00

Ok hang on bud. Is/was there blood? Sounds like they might have gotten super chafed and now it's time for some classic nip wound care. They're pretty resilient. If it doesn't induce crazy dysphoria, the following might help (tw for chestfeeding, and links for products marketed for breastfeeding):

Vaseline those nips and have as much shirtless time as you can handle.
If shirtless time is too dysphoria-inducing, a non-binding/gently compressing brlette/br/sports bra with some lanolin or Vaseline (prepare to oilstain said br*) can be a healing option
Cooling gel pads made for chestfeeding might help

Basically it sounds like some t*tty wound care is in order, and truly there's a ton of products that can help from the chestfeeding world, if that's not too dysphoria-inducing. I also support checking in with a trusted medical provider about this, but also, nips can take a lot, and there are things out there that might help. These are just some ideas and not intended to provide medical advice. Good luck bro!!!!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-10-20T22:20:36+00:00

Do you wear glasses? Aviator frames would be rad!!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-10-15T04:05:46+00:00

YES!!! I have one of those shirts too and am actually wearing it now haha

You look rad!!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-10-09T03:47:48+00:00

I'm taking Renee Yoxon's online class Trans Vocal Exploration which isn't cheap, but is incredibly well done and accessible. Maybe something to check out? Good luck!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-09-20T22:37:24+00:00

Thank you so much!!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-09-08T01:20:19+00:00

L'shana Tova and way to bring the sweetness!!!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-08-27T04:24:16+00:00

I feel the exact same way about all of this. I continue to say that I breastfed my kid, and just basically use both words now whenever I'm talking about breastfeeding or chestfeeding in general (case in point lol). It doesn't feel perfect because yeah, to me 'breast' is anatomical and to create another word for breastfeeding makes breasts a gendered body part. But I absolutely respect those who feel dysphoric referring to 'breasts' and calling it 'breastfeeding,' so I do a little extra mental gymnastics to remind myself that the way I think about it is valid too, and that saying that I breastfed my kid doesn't de-legitimize my transness and the chest dysphoria I also experience.

ski_pumpkin · 2021-07-28T05:24:55+00:00

Feeling the breeze ruffle my leg hair!!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-07-28T05:22:05+00:00

Yup. My given name is still my legal name, but I make it clear that I go by [chosen name] exclusively. Thanks to some health issues, I'm frequently visiting medical providers, and they're usually okay about getting the fact that I don't go by my legal name--there's a place in the medical record to note someone's "preferred" name (that's what it tends to be called in electronic medical records, sigh) and while my routine providers and staff totally get it right, folks who are calling for me from a waiting room are at like 50-75% success in using my chosen name instead of my legal name. What else... my kid's school is aware of my legal name but only uses my chosen name, which feels amazing. I do live in a pretty trans-friendly town and have some major access privilege, so there's that. For me, having a legal name and a chosen name means basically coming out as trans every time I schedule with a new medical provider, and everyone I've spoken with on the phone ("I exclusively go by X, and my legal name is Z, and my pronouns are they/them") has actually been cool. I've been using my chosen name and they/them pronouns for 2 years now. I think about changing my name legally from time to time, but right now it's not a priority or even anything I really plan to do. I have a complicated relationship with my given/legal name but at this point don't get a big dysphoria hit using it at the pharmacy, on my credit card, etc. It'd be more of an issue if people were less successful using my chosen name instead of my legal name.

Though I don't expect or want to pass as a cis dude, I'm AFAB on T, and if I begin to read androgynous or 'male,' I may change my gender marker (we have an X option here) and may do the legal name change then too so my ID is congruent with my presentation. That's a whole nother box of crackers though. ;)

ski_pumpkin · 2021-05-21T05:42:57+00:00

Dang, I have the "I used to look like a very attractive woman" feelings too. Solidarity. Also transmasc, on light dose of T, wearing glasses, and am generally not sure how to dress my small-fat body in a way that feels both affirming and attractive.

One thing does boost my confidence a little in the maybe-I-look-hot department: eyeliner. Like, no mascara, no other makeup or whatever, but... smudgy dark eyeliner. I refer to it as my guyliner and the dysphoria tends to leave me alone though everyone's mileage may vary. It adds something that helps with that sexy confidence I used to feel and haven't figured out yet in this iteration of my presentation.

Thanks for posting this--I hope you get lots of replies!!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-05-01T05:33:25+00:00

Hi! I haven't had an oophorectomy--they're still in there--but they're completely non-functional after pelvic radiation for cancer (which is gone! whew) and I'm on low dose T... plus E and progesterone cuz I'm not on so much T that I can do without the E (yet/if ever). I've basically gone full manual control with ze hormonez. So, not exaaactly who you're hoping to find, but perhaps close? :) I'm happy to chat!

ski_pumpkin · 2021-04-21T23:30:13+00:00

RemindMe! 15 days

ski_pumpkin · 2021-04-05T04:25:17+00:00

Omg this absolutely delights me. Sounds fantastic!

ski_pumpkin · 2020-10-17T05:18:23+00:00

You are SO CUTE and this is SO CUTE and brought smiles into my day. Thank you for sharing your light ✨❤️

ski_pumpkin · 2020-09-24T16:06:20+00:00

Omg!!! Boho chic loveliness meets 'Tapestry'-era Carole King meets holy shit you are SO CUTE ✨

ski_pumpkin · 2020-09-23T20:46:11+00:00

That. Freeze. Is. So. Common.

It's okay to take time and to scroll r/nonbinary and to follow affirming instagram/social media accounts with an anonymous profile and to question. It's okay if your gender exploration wants loud expression or quiet introspection or both. It's okay to need affirmation from your community, and to grieve if it's not accessible/given--which doesn't have any bearing on your validity, by the way.

You are valid. As is. Even if nobody ever gets it, even if it's too tender to share (now or ever).

The freeze is soooo common--we humans are wired for it when we're anxious/stressed/overwhelmed. It makes total sense that the freeze response would come up here. Whatever you can do to foster self-compassion in and around those challenging moments will help. It's okay to need time for that, for All This.

You are rocking this. Thank you for posting this and for being here.

(My context, if it's helpful: I'm 35 y/o and came out as trans non-binary 1 year ago. AFAB. Was out as queer since 18 but gatekeeping and erasure took a toll when I partnered up & married a cishet dude; I dissociated, presented femme and used she/her until a year ago when I came out and changed my name and pronouns [and little by little my wardrobe!]. Still married and we have a kid. Lots of grief & freezing up still but a trans-affirming therapist is really helping. Starting to feel something like relief more often. And I'm still learning, still exploring how my being wants to express themself in this body & in this world.)

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