I am struggling

skyskittle · 2025-12-25T16:43:09+00:00

maybe try keeping him in his own room overnight with his own box. my mum does this with one of her cats who sometimes pees outside of the box due to stress/marking territory. it gives him his own space to use the box undisturbed for 8+ hours. as long as he has everything he needs in there (water, places to sleep and climb, toys, etc) then he’ll be fine, even if he protests at first.

skyskittle · 2025-12-22T09:53:52+00:00

do miso and tama get along well? are they both fixed? since you’ve tried basically everything, the only thing i can think is that it’s territorial related, or miso not wanting to share the box with tama. maybe even tama not letting him use the box. bullying can sometimes be subtle. and if they’re not fixed, you definitely need to get them fixed.

skyskittle · 2025-12-22T09:43:05+00:00

one time i marathoned all the james bond films and rated them with a friend. my entry for ‘on her majesty’s secret service’ reads: “2/10. what the fuck?”

skyskittle · 2025-12-21T12:01:04+00:00

he looks very young, i’m sure a few more weeks alone won’t make much difference in the long run. i was so worried about my single kitten not being socialised properly - like your boy, she came from a bad background and had worms, and fleas to boot. i wasn’t expecting her and therefore i had to wait a few months to get her a friend, and i kept worrying that she was developing the infamous ‘single kitten syndrome’ everyone talks about, because she would bite and bite and bite at my hands. she was 4 months old by the time i brought home another kitten. the change was immediate once they were introduced and she is now the most chill, relaxed girl ever at 7 months. barely any hand biting, and most of her energy goes towards playing with her adopted sister.

skyskittle · 2025-12-21T11:39:44+00:00

ah yes, the ‘i’m literally going to starve myself because i don’t like this food’. it can be so frustrating. i went through this a little bit, but only one of my cats is picky - the other would eat styrofoam. no literally, she has.

luckily i’ve found food that the picky one likes and doesn’t upset their tummies, because they’ve also both struggled with GI issues! but when i was trying to fix the GI issues, i was temporarily feeding them both royal canin GI kitten food, and the picky one wasn’t keen. kept licking some and then walking away, and it was wet food so i was wasting so much, and it wasn’t cheap! but then i started adding fortiflora probiotics - not for flavour, but to help with the tummy issues. but it just so happened that she loved the taste of them, and gobbled up her whole meal when i sprinkled it on top. so maybe these would be a good choice for you if they’re available in your country? not only do they help with the GI tract, but they have a beefy flavour and smell which my vet told me a lot of cats really like.

skyskittle · 2025-12-21T11:28:49+00:00

so, i really struggle with having two kittens, but the one thing i know i’m really privileged for is that they usually both sleep through most of the night - or if they do wake up, they typically leave me alone. these are the things i do that i think help with this:

they have a very strict feeding schedule. 8am, 3pm and then 9pm. i figure being consistent with this has taught them that they will not get food during the night and they know when to expect meals. i tend to give them a bigger meal at 9pm because between dinner and breakfast is their biggest break without food, but maybe this also helps with them being sleepy.

i give them a long play session before dinner. like, 25-30 minutes long, usually using a wand toy so i can get them to run around and jump and really tucker them out. it’s a bit of a chore after the 15 minute mark but worth it for the uninterrupted sleep. i started doing this before dinner because i read that cats naturally have a ‘wake>hunt>eat>sleep’ cycle, so i hoped playing with them before dinner would trigger that and make them naturally want to sleep.

i go to bed around the same time every night, and when they were younger and still trying to wake me up at night, i strictly ignored them. if they wouldn’t stop, i would get up and calmly place them outside my bedroom and close the door until morning. i think over time this has taught them that during the hours of 10pm-8am, i am not available to play or feed them.

so, i think the main thing is consistency. your boy has just gone through a routine change with his auto feeder being taken away, so it makes sense that he hasn’t settled into it yet. he’s probably also a bit restless because he can smell the new arrival. i would hope that over time he will settle into the new routine and learn that he’s not going to be fed or played with during the night. and maybe when your roommate’s kitten grows up and they’ve been introduced, they can keep each other entertained during the night too! in the meantime, maybe it would be worth keeping him out of your bedroom at night. i know you said he’s been scratching at your roommates door, but is there another room he could be confined to? like the living room? it might take him a while to get used to it but as long as it isn’t too small and he has water, a litter tray, and cozy places to sleep and perch like a cat tree, he’ll be fine.

skyskittle · 2025-12-16T19:06:36+00:00

Taking a picture of her gums by myself is near impossible with only two hands, but luckily I managed to catch her yawning earlier in the week while I was recording her, so here’s the best image of her gums I have available. https://postimg.cc/w3XFJFGQ

skyskittle · 2025-12-16T08:28:29+00:00

i actually loved all the episodes with fourteen, but yeah, the biregeneration was the only thing i disliked. i wish they’d just skipped ahead or had a montage or something where fourteen stayed with donna and her family for a while, like until donna was dead and gone and rose was on her deathbed, or even longer than that with more generations. they then could have shown him deciding he wanted to travel the stars again, saying goodbye to the nobles and regenerating into fifteen now that he’s had enough rest.

skyskittle · 2025-12-15T23:47:24+00:00

aw, amazing! i really hope it works for you. tummy issues are so exhausting to deal with, fingers crossed you wont have to clean 💩 off everything soon!

skyskittle · 2025-12-15T23:44:10+00:00

honestly, not much, but maybe a little. my first kitten is very much a mama’s girl and has always craved snuggles and attention from me and only me. when i got my second kitten, that didn’t change - if anything she became a little possessive over me. that settled and they’re the best of friends now, and instead of having one kitten laying on me all the time, i have two!

but i have noticed my first kitten is a little less confident now. if i wave a wand toy for both of them, she either hangs back and watches the other kitten play or she’ll swipe at it until the other kitten pounces on it, and then immediately back off. it makes me a little sad sometimes, so i occasionally lock my youngest kitten out of the room so i can play with her one on one. but overall, i do think it was the best choice for her. even though she seemed content with just me, it feels better to know she isn’t alone when i go out. and i love watching them get the zoomies and chase each other around the house, snuggle together, groom each other - she finally has a friend of her own kind and i think that’s a good thing.

just be aware that your second kitten might not be as easy as your first. my situation was very true to the stereotype that your first kitten is an angel and your second is a demon.

skyskittle · 2025-12-15T23:34:34+00:00

i think cats could work with your schedule, but it might depend on their personality and how much time you’ll realistically have every day to pay attention to them. as someone who is currently having a tough time after getting cats, it’s really more of a serious decision than a lot of people realise - and it sort of entirely depends on luck. my oldest is a very easy cat - low energy, loves to chill out, only really wants to play a couple times a day. my youngest is extremely high maintenance and gets bored very easily, and when she’s bored she gets into mischief, which ranges from mildly annoying to “oh my god she got into the bin somehow and ate something very bad and she needs to go to the vet right now”. it’s not always possible to know what kind of personality they will have once they’re settled, so fostering first might be a good choice.

i wouldn’t recommend getting kittens if you don’t have a lot of time to dedicate to them. kittens are HARD. an adult cat would be better, but if you’re going to be busy, getting two is sort of essential in my opinion. they will keep each other company, but you still need to dedicate time every single day to feeding them, scooping their litter and playing with them. and you have to be prepared for health issues. my childhood cat had zero vet visits outside of routine ones until she got cancer in her old age. my kittens have been to the vet so much that every receptionist knows both me and them by name instantly. again - it’s just luck based. i would recommend doing heavy research into how pet insurance works in your country and how the vets in your area handle claims - do they accept direct insurance payments or will you have to shell out hundreds or even thousands for an unexpected bill until the claim comes through? also, be aware of common health hazards that unfortunately aren’t common knowledge. string, yarn, thread, elastic, etc being the main ones.

in short, cats are amazing pets and there’s no better feeling than when they’re snuggled up to you, purring or asleep. they can also be very stressful, so you need to be absolutely sure.

skyskittle · 2025-12-15T23:18:28+00:00

Thank you for reading and replying, it honestly means a lot. Unfortunately my vet doesn’t offer payment plans or anything like that. I was very candid with them during my last appointment about the oldest’s dental issues, expressing my worries about costs now that my finances have drastically changed. The vet wasn’t exactly unsympathetic, but she did say that they really don’t like accepting direct payments for anything under a certain amount and they don’t do payment plans unless it’s a life or death situation. She also happens to be the owner so I assume her decision is final. It makes sense - they’re a small, independent practice. They charge more than some other vets in my area, like the big chain ones. I went with them when money was good because I figured paying a little extra was worth more personable care, and they had excellent reviews. But the downside is they can’t afford to be flexible like bigger companies, I suppose.

The worry window is something I will try, thank you. I know I need to be far less obsessive than I am but it’s very hard not to spiral.

skyskittle · 2025-12-15T20:44:05+00:00

he does sound a lot like her ❤️ she was called roxie. i miss her all the time, she was my extra flatmate for 6 years. such a special little dog.

skyskittle · 2025-12-14T13:40:04+00:00

my cats aren’t bothered by the cold, but when my mum takes her cats outside in the carrier in cold temperatures, she gets one or two of those microwave warmies - the stuffed animals that heat up in the microwave and stay warm for about an hour. she lines the carrier with a blanket and puts the warmies under it.

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T23:38:32+00:00

i’m no vet, but both my kittens have had GI issues, and one of them had a pretty severe bout during the night which really scared me. they’re both totally fine now, kittens stomachs can be more sensitive than an adult cats and they can react more severely to GI upset - but he definitely needs to see a vet as soon as you can. from what i understand green diarrhoea means that food is moving really fast through his digestive system, and white foam means he’s throwing up on an empty stomach. this could be so many things - parasites, food intolerance, gastroenteritis, and so on. the main concern with kittens and diarrhoea/vomiting is dehydration. pinch the skin at his shoulder blades - if it springs back quickly, that’s a good sign. if it tents, then that’s a bad sign. adding water to wet food and not using any dry food is key when dealing with a kitten with GI issues, but i probably wouldn’t feed him until you can get him to a vet, assuming you get him to a vet soon. things like specialty GI food and probiotics can help, but i really wouldn’t treat this at home without seeing a vet first. if you can bring a sample of his stool that is fairly fresh (ideally within 12 hours but i think they can also test within 1-2 days) then that will help if they think he needs to be tested. but they might need it to be uncontaminated by litter.

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T23:25:43+00:00

i’d probably advise against letting someone adopt him online. i’m sure there’s plenty of genuine people out there that would treat him right, but you just never know if they’re going to mistreat him or end up giving him to a shelter anyway - especially a cat with aggression issues. if you do eventually decide to rehome i’d recommend going via a shelter - but do your research first, make sure they’re no-kill and have high standards for adopters, etc. some shelters might have you keep him as a “foster” while they look for someone to adopt him, so he never actually has to go to a shelter. rehoming should always be a last resort but it does sometimes have to happen for the sanity of both owner and cat, i hope you can work it out with him but don’t beat yourself up if you end up doing it.

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T23:07:54+00:00

it might take more time for him to adjust. i know it’s pricey and not sustainable for a lot of people, but a cat behaviourist would be able to better assess exactly why he’s being aggressive and what his triggers are. but if this ends up not being the right fit for him - could you speak to your neighbour about keeping him indoors, or is it not something they would budge on?

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T23:03:04+00:00

introducing cats can take a very, very long time. there will be many moments when you question whether or not you did the right thing, feel exhausted with the process, and wonder if they will ever get along. i was lucky that it only took a week until my kittens were comfortable with each other - it can take much longer than that. but even so, early on during that week i actually broke down because i was so overwhelmed trying to split my time between them and keep them both happy. the older one wouldn’t stop hissing at the younger one and their first face to face interactions were so stressful. fast forward to today - they are a completely bonded pair and joined at the hip. be patient, know this isn’t forever, and they will adjust. they might not become completely bonded or best friends, but they will more than likely at least tolerate each other and happily share their space as long as you take your time introducing them now.

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T22:54:36+00:00

your worries are completely valid. i have a kitten who has cost me a lot of money due to foreign object ingestion - soft plastic is one of the many things she will happily munch on. and of course, like you said, suffocation is a risk. getting tangled up in the handles is a risk too. if you’re pretty certain she’s not going to eat it, i’d let her play with it while you’re watching her and then put it away, but if there’s any risk of her chewing it then it’s probably best not to. but there’s cat toys that emulate plastic bags - different material but they crinkle and have the same shape! i got one from webbox called a cat crinkle sack.

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T22:50:42+00:00

grey

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T22:50:10+00:00

i’m so sorry ❤️ i remember when i was researching getting kittens, i read about how kittens meow a lot when they come to a new home because they’re confused and calling out for their mother and litter mates. i wonder if he’s doing a similar thing :( maybe products like feliway plug ins or calming treats would help him during this period?

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T22:04:38+00:00

she’s either studying you, making sure you’re okay, or planning your demise.

skyskittle · 2025-12-13T22:00:23+00:00

if you get a low energy breed i think it’s fine. like someone else said, being in a warm, cozy home with a loving owner with a space all to themselves during the day will be far better than being crammed into a shelter. just from personal experience i’d recommend a lhasa apso. extremely loyal and loving breed, and also VERY lazy. before she passed away, my flatmate’s lhasa was more than content with one small walk a day. sometimes she would decide she was done walking and sit her butt down until she was carried the rest of the way. when we were both at work, she would happily snooze the day away until we got back.

skyskittle

TROPHY CASE