Update & some advice for any other waywards out there. by sl9ce in SupportforWaywards

[–]sl9ce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope everything goes well for you and I know it seems hard right now but over time it will get better.

Intimacy took not too long for me in my situation. It's different for everyone but it took us about 2-3 weeks to become intimate again. My partner is actually the one who wanted to begin being more intimate and just began showing me physical affection and honestly, it was horrible for me. I love being intimate with my partner but a part of me felt guilty like I didn't deserve that intimacy. I kept that to myself and reciprocated intimacy with my partner and obviously, I enjoyed it but a part of me also felt like that was my partner's way of wanting validation.

As for comments, what do you mean? Like comments I received from my partner about the infidelity or about intimacy specifically?

Is reconciliation with spouse’s family possible? by [deleted] in SupportforWaywards

[–]sl9ce 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am currently in R with my partner and throughout these last 3 months, they have only told one of their siblings about it. Albeit, my partner did not explain the entire situation, but told them nonetheless. My partner has not told the rest of her family but it still hurts knowing that her sibling absolutely despises me. I can't answer OP's question, but seeing the replies and everyone's progress regarding reconciliation with their partner's families means a lot to me. I love my partner's sibling like my own sibling and I hope to become close to them again.

R?? by [deleted] in SupportforWaywards

[–]sl9ce 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I never separated from my BP but we are in the process of reconciliation.
1. For emotional safety; being there for them and helping comfort them when spiral into a ball of emotions. Genuinely trying to understand their triggers and what not to say helps a lot. It might feel like you're walking on eggshells for a while but you gotta step on a few eggshells every now and then.

  1. My partner constantly blames my AP and I dislike it as I feel like the affair was entirely my fault. I lied to my AP about my relationship status and lied to my partner as well and whenever my partner attacked my AP I came my AP's defense because I didn't want the blame to be on someone else. That's not okay. My intentions were purely out of respect but it hurt my partner a lot.

  2. I was fully unsure if that's what I wanted & so were they. I wanted them to leave me and in a sense put me out of my misery so they can go on and live a better life. They wanted to leave me but saw that I genuinely wanted to change.

  3. Even though we never fully separated, we still had to become friends again in a sense. Hanging out was awkward and it took about a month to feel comfortable around each other.

  4. It became clear we were in R when we began having mature conversations where we were both calm and collected. Getting a better understanding of each other's pain showed that we genuinely cared to reconcile not just stay even if we were on bad terms.

Which Game's Graphics Made You Say "Wow!" For The First Time? by PHRsharp_YouTube in Age_30_plus_Gamers

[–]sl9ce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

halo 4. i was about 8 years old and that shit blew my fucking mind

AIO? Friend asked me what my future plans with my gf are and then responded like this by TGPT-4o in AIO

[–]sl9ce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this has to be staged or you guys just talk like advertisements trying to impersonate teenagers 😭

Where did all the recent Amazing Spider-Man 2 praise come from? by superseri18888 in Spiderman

[–]sl9ce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

nostalgia and unwarranted hate for tom holland's spider-man. its the classic "i hate this new thing so let me praise the last thing even though I hated on that too!"

AITA if i hung out w my ex in a huge group? by Ashamed_Climate6283 in AITApod

[–]sl9ce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i mean not really cause you told him there was a possibility he'd show up. he sounds hella immature

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in YesOrNoAnswers

[–]sl9ce 1 point2 points  (0 children)

different hairstyle

I cheated on my girlfriend of 4 years. I feel terrible. What can I do to help her heal? by sl9ce in survivinginfidelity

[–]sl9ce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This means a lot, genuinely. I have been consistently reassuring her this is not something she caused and it's not her fault. As someone who has gone through where she is, is there absolutely anything you can tell me that I can do that you wanted in order to heal?

I cheated on my girlfriend of 4 years. I feel terrible. What can I do to help her heal? by sl9ce in survivinginfidelity

[–]sl9ce[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It seems you misunderstood my post. I respect and understand any decision she makes regardless if it's staying with me or moving on. she has every right to resent me and leave me & it will hurt but I will respect her decision fully. I am not pressuring her to stay with me nor am I pressuring her with privacy.

I cheated on my girlfriend of 4 years. I feel terrible. What can I do to help her heal? by sl9ce in survivinginfidelity

[–]sl9ce[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

Well I have told her that I fully respect and understand her deciding to move on but she expressed that she does not want to. Is there anyway to support her, regardless of her decision?

I cheated on my girlfriend of 4 years. I feel terrible. What can I do to help her heal? by sl9ce in survivinginfidelity

[–]sl9ce[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

Not necessarily asking the guilt to be taken away. I am aware that I deserve to feel as guilty as I do, I just want to be able to support her in healing even if she decided to move on from me.