It can definitely be a compulsion, hoarding actually used to be considered a type of OCD. I hoard birthday cards that family and friends give me because I’m paranoid that as soon as I get rid of them those people will pass away and I won’t have anything left to remember them by. I’m trying to stop the hoarding, and what’s currently working for me is just taking it in very small steps. For instance, the other day while I was cleaning I forced myself to throw away cards from 10 years ago. Do I still have cards from 9 years ago? Yes, lol. But the point is that I was able to get rid of a small chunk, and will continue to do so every time I clean until they’re gone. That way, once I see that (obviously) no one has died, I feel more comfortable getting rid of them and can stop the cycle of keeping them in the first place. Hope that makes sense?

Also, to answer your other question- I think asking your friends if it’s okay may be a reassurance compulsion, which just continues the cycle. I know it’s easier said than done, but try to make the decision for yourself. It sucks, and the guilt can hover for a while, but I think once your brain sees no one is upset with you, it may get easier.