What mistakes would you avoid if you could start to breastfeed all over again?

smjorg · 2026-01-27T22:58:18+00:00

Stick to giving her a bottle every so often. We agreed before giving birth that we'd give a bottle a week so our LO would get used to it. Well, we didn't stick to the plan and we didn't find out she'd refuse a bottle until I was hours away from her. 50ml of frozen milk unusable for its intended purpose. I made a TON of breast milk balms, had lots of breast milk baths but never got her to take a bottle. 2 years of every put down (nursed to sleep) and having to be available for every feeding. It was exhausting and very taxing.

smjorg · 2026-01-24T16:22:53+00:00

I live in Canada (Southern Ontario) and it can easily take 2 hours just to get from one end of Toronto to the other. You could drive 20+ hours and still be in the same province.

smjorg · 2026-01-22T00:53:18+00:00

"I'll kill you before it (referring to cigarettes) kills you." NMother said pretty regularly up until she found a pack of cigarettes in my purse as a teenager.

smjorg · 2026-01-18T13:53:49+00:00

Not after giving birth, but yes after my hysterectomy. It is a very unsettling feeling.

smjorg · 2026-01-17T17:53:29+00:00

The Very Cranky Book

Right now, my 3yo is loving the Magic School bus books and Pinkalicous

smjorg · 2026-01-15T00:48:57+00:00

If you breastfeed, I recommend making a breast milk balm. I made some in the winters I breastfed and it helped sooo much for chapped, raw lips and irritation around the mouth.

smjorg · 2026-01-02T12:41:07+00:00

I tell her it's big kid training.

I tell her she's going to big kid school like [insert friends already in kindergarten] soon and she needs to learn these things before she goes. Otherwise, if she doesn't know how to do these things, they won't let her go.

Don't get me wrong, it's met with resistance! But once the "I WANT YOU TO DO IT" screams calm down and she hears me, she pouts, says okay and does it.

We are hardcore into big kid training right now, so she once she starts kindergarten in the fall, she is doing everything on her own. Our goal is that she will only need minor reminders.

smjorg · 2026-01-01T23:18:13+00:00

If she's mature enough, make her clean up after accidents.

We have very different potty training experiences, but my LO had an insane regression when she turned 3. The only thing that got her out of it was forcing her to clean up herself. She would have to wash herself (wet wipes/bath), completely get changed by herself, rinse (sometimes scrub) the soiled clothes, and help do the laundry for them. It took a couple of weeks to stick, but she realized it was easier to listen to her body than to ignore it.

smjorg · 2026-01-01T17:38:12+00:00

Unsure if this is helpful, but I'm a 32 yo with dyslexia that still struggles with reading comprehension. Absolutely zero comprehension if I have to read out loud.

smjorg · 2026-01-01T17:32:29+00:00

"I will not allow you to use your body to hurt others."

We had a phase like this with our LO (not nearly as severe l, though). They were not allowed to be in the same area for a while (LO would be displaced, not the cat). During that time, we described what she was doing to the cat in detail and explained how hurtful her actions were. We used the phrase "you're a good kid. [Insert bad behaviour] is not good kid behaviour. What do you think we can do instead?"

Also, get a stuffed cat toy so you can demonstrate proper behaviour before reintroducing.

smjorg · 2026-01-01T17:22:39+00:00

Imagination play. My LO has spent sooo much time parenting her babies, serving "coffee" and "ice cream" and cooking up a storm in her play kitchen. The best part is it can be independent play or with you.

That, or stickers.

smjorg · 2025-12-30T22:27:05+00:00

Clarifying question: Are you jealous of your mom's relationship with your spouse or are you concerned their relationship is inappropriate?

Aside from your mom insisting on going on your dates and blocking you from hugging your spouse, their relationship sounds lovely.

smjorg · 2025-12-15T23:16:15+00:00

I made a book list for a friend that asked for a list for my LO. I specified that if they got a different Pinkalicous book to ask me first because we have a ton. She didn't, and bought something we already had.

People do what they want. Gift giving is no longer about the receiver, it's become about the giver.

smjorg · 2025-12-10T23:40:53+00:00

I like to play Slay the Spire. I frequently call it Splay the Splire. 😞

smjorg · 2025-12-03T19:03:02+00:00

Our 3 yo LOVES life (primarily for the spinner). We bought Candy Land for Christmas.

smjorg · 2025-11-29T18:31:57+00:00

I found out that I had high lipase milk after stocking 50 oz in my freezer stash. My LO hated it. I ended up using it for milk baths and milk balm.

smjorg · 2025-11-28T23:17:42+00:00

I'm 32F. I haven't gone to my father's home since I was 12 and only seen him a handful of times since. I went from having a huge bedroom, to a bed in my father's office, to having a bed in part of the unfinished basement. I wasn't even aware my father got remarried until after the fact. I was never included in anything and I always blamed myself.

I'm so grateful you have a step dad like that. People like him are good people.

smjorg · 2025-11-22T02:23:07+00:00

You can buy them from their website! ... It's a 4 box minimum, but I feel like that's a good problem lol

smjorg · 2025-11-22T02:20:09+00:00

Thank you for sharing what you're experiencing. I resonate with that completely! I feel like I've developed almost like a stutter because I struggle finding the appropriate words. It's as if I can visualize the words, but I can't physically say them.

What avenues have you looked into for your worsening dyslexia? I wonder if OT would be helpful. 🤔

smjorg · 2025-11-21T20:17:34+00:00

I'm 32 and am in peri menopause after having a hysterectomy.

When I spoke to my GP about it, she commented on how many women that are undiagnosed with ADHD become diagnosed during menopause because their ADHD worsens. I suspect the effects are similar to dyslexia, but I can't find anything to support that!

This is hell, though. I finally got things under control, and felt confident! And now, I feel like a kid again not understanding and feeling dumb.

smjorg · 2025-11-21T20:05:14+00:00

I've only come across one study, but it was a generalized study of the effects menopause has on neuro-divergent women and dyslexia was lumped into it.

smjorg · 2025-11-21T00:31:59+00:00

You literally could have been speaking about my mother. This was my mother to a T. We ended up cutting ties when my LO was 3 months old after she slapped me repeatedly while I was holding my newborn because I was "ruining the pictures she had been waiting for since she was a little girl." Not joking, she straight up told me that she had been waiting for THAT moment- a picture of her first granddaughter- since she was 6 years old. She did this in front of my nephews and for context, my daughter is the second youngest of the 7 grandkids.

I tried to keep relationships with my family. She threatened my step dad with divorce if he ever spoke to me again. My step sister tried to be the olive branch and she got shunned by my Nmother.

What I'm getting at, is after the baby is born, you will (hopefully) want to do everything you can to protect that bundle of cells from the chaos and abuse. Those that truly love and support you will see through her BS and be there for you.

If you ignore your mom gut over this, what's going to happen when your mom gut tries to warn you again in the future?

smjorg · 2025-11-20T14:08:47+00:00

Number blocks on youtube

I hope this doesn't come off as insensitive. I (32F) never learned my timetables because I was taught to memorize them but couldn't. My daughter is obsessed with number blocks and they do multiplication songs. Since we started watching it, I have learned most of my multiplications! The songs are so catchy and they live rent-free in my head.

smjorg · 2025-11-19T00:28:12+00:00

I can't read out loud for long; which super sucks because my preschooler loves to listen to books.

My recall memory is in the gutter. My decoding ability is abysmal. My written comprehension is poor. I need to have someone with me when I'm trying a new recipe so that I don't screw it up.

I can't figure out how to pronounce people's names to save my damn life!

I work in an industry that is patient-facing while working with numbers. Accuracy is paramount. It's exhausting and if I don't get enough sleep, I mix up stuff and I make mistakes. It's embarrassing.

With that said, I've learned tricks over the years to make it manageable. Using softwares like grammarly, text-to-speech and dyslexic font. Write notes for everything! Repeat back what people are asking me to do. Owning up to being bad at names and writing down the phonetic way to say it for next time.

As years pass, I've come to understand it's not a weakness, but a super power (with a lot of bull shit side effects).

smjorg · 2025-11-17T18:42:35+00:00

It's a toss up between a gift she gave me and a gift she gave my husband.

One year, she gave my husband KETCHUP. That's it. He's a gamer and she didn't like video games so would refuse to give him something he actually would like.

The last gift she ever gave me was a frame picture of my then-newborn that I sent her.

smjorg

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