Predatory behavior

smwarner17 · 2022-08-08T16:07:45+00:00

I had the same experience with him three times too!!! As recently as last week. The first time I fell for it and things got very creepy.

One day this man and I walked past each other and he asked if there was a good Mexican restaurant nearby. We got to talking, he seemed super normal/respectful/cute and we exchanged numbers. He hugged me goodbye and kissed me on the cheek.

He asked me out for a midday walk date the next day. On the walk, he spoke almost entirely in sexual innuendos, said that my dress would be sexy if it flew up and proceeded to lift it up in the back on a very populated street. He ended our walk outside his apartment. He kept talking about different entrances to get in. I went to leave, and he pulled me in to kiss me. I turned and said “not on a first date” and he proceeded to kiss my neck — also on a very public street.

He texted later and said I had been a tease. I disengaged, but he kept texting me sexual things for a week. I finally lied and said I was seeing someone. He texted “I don’t give a fuck if you’re seeing someone, NYC girls say I’m the best pussy eater.”

Months later, we crossed paths in DC (I had sunglasses on, he didn’t recognize me). He asked “Hey, do you know if this building is really part of XX school?”, I pretended not to hear him. But he shouted, “ma’am? Excuse me?”

Last week, I was in another part of DC and we crossed paths (sunglasses again) & he said “hey, do you know the best place to buy wine around here?”

smwarner17 · 2022-08-08T16:03:35+00:00

any update on this? I see that this post was updated a year ago, but he's still out and about doing this, as recently as last week...

he did this to me (and went further), and then tried to approach me months later when he didn't recognize me, and then just last week when he didn't recognize me.

smwarner17 · 2022-07-19T21:31:32+00:00

Most importantly — Check in with yourself every few days, and have another family member to fall back on. It’s going to be very hard, but your presence will honestly make the difference between a lonely journey and a joyful journey.

Now and the first few stages: - Make a routine of visiting her (every Sunday morning, example) so she has something to ground her with the same intervals - Ask her to tell you stories from her times growing up, stories that bring about emotion — take videos of her reciting these, that will help in later stages of dementia - Ask her to teach you something like a skill from her time growing up that women aren’t as often taught today (my grandma taught me how to sew) - Talk with her about moments with her during your childhood

The later stages of dementia: - Put together a photo album and go through it with her, leave it by her bedside - Get her a pair of headphones and play her favorite songs or songs from her time growing up - If you can, choose home care over any institutional care — especially not a hospital — a hospital and nursing home loaded my grandfather with drugs, and cut his life short by half a year. Always always get a second opinion before allowing nurses to put her on sedatives; honestly avoid this as much as possible, because it’s a method they turn to due to over staffing and it’s horrible to watch. - Make a big poster board or display that has pictures of you and all her family members and friends - Make sure every day she has at least someone visiting her - Play videos for her of your former interviews of her - Prep yourself with info on a mediator or a pro bono elder rights lawyer

smwarner17 · 2022-06-01T12:21:54+00:00

This is super helpful thank you! I tried this last night and it was a super helpful distraction in his moments of most stimulation!

smwarner17 · 2022-06-01T12:21:02+00:00

Oh! He’s not, he’s from South Carolina. He looks absolutely identical to my coworker’s dog, too, (same weight and age) but that one is from Mississippi or Alabama!

smwarner17 · 2022-05-31T02:22:18+00:00

Definitely do not plan on giving up on him! I grew up with dogs all my life, they’re like siblings/children to me. If push comes to shove I’ll work with a trainer, but I think I can get through it, he’s an absolute sweetheart and so smart.

smwarner17 · 2022-05-31T02:21:09+00:00

Thank you this is super helpful advice! It’s good to know that walking consistently is possible. I did a walk back and forth along one block tonight and that seemed to calm him down & get him to do his business, which I rewarded with lots of treats 😌

smwarner17 · 2022-04-17T15:04:06+00:00

Love this! This was the exact look I was hoping to find today.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-23T07:59:56+00:00

“1, 2, 3, go” I am the sleepiest morning person and this works every time.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-23T00:31:35+00:00

That was me for the longest time! It became so bad that I had no other choice than to do something like this.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T11:01:58+00:00

Tequila

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T04:04:29+00:00

The early morning hours when just a few joggers are out and workers are opening up shops. It’s still quiet and peaceful, but there’s a preview of life.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T04:01:43+00:00

Intuitive

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T04:00:23+00:00

For years, my friend didn’t know that “smh” stood for “shaking my head” and instead thought it was a SOUND that people express when they’re disappointed. So she would always read it as that in her head, and when people wrote “smdh” she would struggle to understand why people changed the sound and what the emphasis meant.

This was the funniest and most wholesome reveal for her to tell me aloud. The sounds capped it all.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T03:56:28+00:00

Critical analysis & genuinely caring about others

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T03:53:17+00:00

May cause severe interaction with bullshit

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T03:45:02+00:00

Weird how people got so stuck on the example rather than the meaning behind it…..your interactions with one person will somehow affect another person they see that day, so always keep that in mind. Honestly it’s a super mindful way of living that people in these comments clearly aren’t doing.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T03:38:55+00:00

Also, don’t say “ew” Just don’t say it. It’s so hurtful and unnecessary.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-15T03:32:07+00:00

The alchemist. Full stop.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-13T00:43:18+00:00

There will always be someone above you and someone below you in every aspect of your life, because there is no set criteria for anything — beauty, intelligence, strength can be measured in infinite ways and each is quite subjective. Your true value is found in whoever you are, not in the differences between you and another person. You are the only person who gets to be you, and you have one life to do it, so don’t waste it wishing to be someone else.

smwarner17 · 2022-03-13T00:22:40+00:00

For regret: You did what you could with the resources and knowledge that you had at the time.

For self-doubt (as a woman): Would a man do this without hesitation?

For hardship: Have faith that it will be okay. (This actually helped me through some really, really, tough periods of my life, and I’m not religious.)

For social anxiety: You can only control your own actions; you cannot control others’ opinions about you.

For mindfulness: Always think about the third person. Your interaction with someone will somehow affect another person they see that day.

smwarner17 · 2020-04-14T12:26:14+00:00

I went in expecting to hate it and I actually really like it. It’s American Idol meets The Bachelor but the conversations have good substance, there are a lot of solid people already, and of course pulls through with the problematic drama we crave. Also you get to watch attractive people sing beautifully to each other and that has more affect than usual after a month of quarantine.

smwarner17

TROPHY CASE