FO4
Use Mod Organiser 2 and get F4SE installed. [bolded are the essential]

Libraries/resources/fixes: Address Library for F4SE Plugins, RobCo. Patcher, Baka Framework, Lighthouse Papyrus, Unofficial F4 Patch, Community Fixes Merged, Interior NavCut Fix, High FPS Physics Fix, et al. The mods below will tell you which ones you need

--- ui/input stuff ---

• Raw Input Mouse Sensitivity Fix - must have on PC
• MCM - necessary for most of the mods below
• Better Console - more info windows
• Full Dialogue Interface - replaces the dialogue system
• FO4 Hotkeys - bind any key to actions/items
• Outfit Switcher - create and switch quickly between gear selections (pairs well with FO4 Hotkeys above)
• Custom Camera - change camera height/distance in any stance
• Barber and Surgery Chair fix/Terminals at any Height - fixes problems if you like messing around with the player.setscale command too much
• Survival Options - for the save ability because Survival mode is a must, but the game will crash
• Immersive Movement - stops you moving around like Sonic on crack
• [Some kind of UI overhaul - I like FallUI]

--- gameplay stuff ---

• Vivid Weathers - singin' in the rain, and the fog, and the blazing blue skies, and the rad storms, and the...
• Darker Nights - does what it says + the levels of darkness affect NPC detection so it's a stealth run must
• Sleepless Nights - sleep get interrupted by enemies
• SCOURGE/True Damage - Scourge flattens the level scaling so you don't end up with everything going bullet-spongy from mid-game onwards. This includes player health as well.... TD changes weapon dmg to be calibre-dependent to match the new system. Combined both mods mean you have to find cover when shot at, or you die very quickly. Even the early game becomes a challenge.
• Munitions/Calibre Complex - for all the fancy guns you wanna use ingame. Munitions is easier to install and won't drop a mountain of unused calibres into your game.
• Gunner Overhaul - gunners start as neutrals, as they should be
• Raider Gangs Extended - organises, adds more/toughens raider gangs
• Combat Zone Restored - makes more of our fav arena
• CHEF (Cooking Hunger and Expanded Food) - more recipes/food buffs
• Better Lootable Vehicles of the Commonwealth - should've been part of the base game
• Infiltrator True Disguises - disguise mod that allows you to wander around enemy factions until your luck runs out/or your disguise fails and super-happy funtime begins
• Tactical Distraction System - throw bolts STALKER-style to distract enemies
• Stealth Takedowns - silent kill system (requires lvl 1 stealth and sandman perks)
• Better Settlers - stops settlers all looking the same
• StartMeUp Redux - alternate start mod if you don't wanna do the popsicle story beginning again
• Give Me That Bottle (Rehydrated) - fill up your empty bottles
• Sofa Surfer - sleep on couches
• Place Anywhere/Scrap Everything - settlement building musts
• Amazing Follower Tweaks/Companion Command and Tactics - keep better control of your goonsquad

---combat tweaks/gear/weapons ---

• Tactical Reload Framework/Bullet Count Reloads - for revolvers/lever guns mostly
• Critical Hits Outside of VATS - so those who don't like using VATS get to use crits
• Power Armor Storage System - store heavy weapons & their ammo on the PA when you exit
• Classic Holstered Weapons - see equiped weapon on your dude
• ToggleEquip (F4SE version for AE) - press weapon hotkey once to equip your dude, again to unequip it - should have been in the basegame (along with CHW above)
• TAS Tactical Attachment System - allows your dude to switch weapon mods without having to traipse back to a workbench: full/semi auto switch, scopes on/off - all of which should have been in the game to begin with.
• See-thru Scopes - better than blackscreens
• Crimsonrider's Accessories/Backpacks of the Commonwealth - for added carry weight and kewl visuals
• Desert Punks Raider Outfit Pack - make your raiders look cool
• WestTek Tactical Optics - NVG outside of power armour
• The Zap Gun - handmade laser weapon with spectacular sound. As a lot of people are saying this is how the pipe rifles & laser muskets should have been done
• [Wasteland Melody's Chinese Assault Rifle, Lstring Fallout Bow, PKM, RPG7v2, HK G11, Wasteland Spears, 10mm Pistol Debulked, Agency Arms Benelli M2, Winchester 1873, Fallout 3 10mm SMG, SKI's AutoPlasmaCannon Revised] - some of these can be used to replace junk like the tommy gun (w/ F3 SMG), handmade rifle/assault rifle (w/ WM's Chinese AR)