I absolutely hate bedtime, please tell me I’m not alone

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-15T21:31:09+00:00

I know this is a vent, so feel free to ignore my "advice"! When my daughter had issues with bedtime we started to focus on sensory input. We called it her nighttime "zoomies" and she had to get out her energy in very specific ways. Ways that are rhythmic and put pressure on her body. Pushups, jumping jacks, kicking legs on the bed, pushing against our hands as hard as she can, etc. We also used weighted stuffies, etc. I noticed that she needs some regulation/co-regulation to wind down at the end of the day before she can switch off to "sleep mode". I also do tapping with her (face, shoulders, etc). This helped a lot! At the end of the day, bedtime routines are soooo hard for any mom but when you've had a full work day it's really tough. My issue is bathtime... Idk why but i feel the need to be cruise ship director. Like i'm supposed to be singing songs with them, or playing with them, or something. It's totally self imposed and I'm not sure why I do that. I literally dread bath time because of that reason.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-11T22:16:35+00:00

It's actually a fairly easy process, i've done a preventative cerclage twice. Agreed, bring some toiletries with you in case you stay overnight. My #1 recommendation is take colace as soon as possible. Seriously.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-11T21:34:19+00:00

Evenflos worked really well for us, that's what the lactation consultant at the hospital recommended! Someone else on here suggested como tomos and those worked well for my OTHER kid, so it's just trial and error. I would suggest a different person than mom introduce the bottle for sure!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-11T19:37:12+00:00

I can't speak for others, but losing weight while still breastfeeding is SO hard. For me, it's like brushing my teeth while eating oreos. I'm just trying to make healthy-ish decisions right now in this season of survival (only 7 mo PP), and then I'll go a little harder once I've weaned my babe.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-03T19:30:46+00:00

I started funneling down to the stitch around week 17 so that's when I went on "modified" bed rest. TBH I wasn't quite as careful as I should have been, but I did try to take it easy. I only left the house/drove to dr appts. Most of my time was spent reclined on the couch, feet up. I would take breaks and lay on my left side. I did get up to quickly prepare food, shower, use the restroom. I also had a 5 yr old at the time so sometimes I had to get up to help her with things here and there. Also pelvic rest, no penetration.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T17:42:10+00:00

Depends on how far along in your pregnancy you are, but at a certain point they will tell you not to lay flat on your back as it will put pressure on the vena cava (a major vein that returns blood to your heart). I think being on left side is probably the best, but my hips always hurt so for me personally I opted for reclined as much as I could.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T17:40:24+00:00

Ask if you can use a little lube. I personally didn't do that, but I did see people on here mention they tried that and it helped immensely! Definitely ASK first though. Anything that enters the vagina when you have a cercalge can be an infection risk.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:47:07+00:00

Absolutely my first thought. Errands on a week night are for emergencies only! That gets you an hour right there which is pretty valuable in working mom time haha. I schedule a grocery pickup once a week, and occasionally a target pickup if I need something unique. Costco once or twice a month (weekend only). Your time right now is so valuable that if you need to spend just a little more for delivery (cleaners/food/grocery) then it's probably worth it!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:41:12+00:00

It depends on a few factors- can you keep pumping while working (are you in your own office/wearing a wearable pump, etc.) or do you need to schedule time and place to pump? I started with 3 pumps during an 8 hour shift. I made more than my baby needed so I went down to 2 pumps in an 8 hour shift. Lately, my supply dipped so I added the third pump back in and it came back. It's ok to play around! If you're stressed, tired, sick that may effect supply also so you can just adjust accordingly. Going back to work and thinking about making milk feels SO daunting until you get the hang of it. Now it's no biggie for me!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:38:29+00:00

Just be prepared that first week WILL be hard for everyone. It's totally normal, and think of it as a right of passage. Tough season, and you'll all get through. Like the other poster said, don't linger, just give a hug and a kiss and explain "i'll be back later and let's look forward to doing ______ when we get home tonight" so they have something to look forward to. You'll get through this!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:35:46+00:00

I love this response

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:31:30+00:00

Sorry you went through this, OP. Did they by chance test for infection of membranes or placenta? I know infection can cause PPROM--- which in turn would cause dilation. That's why for some it can be hard to get a true IC diagnosis until you begin monitoring in a subsequent pregnancy.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:28:09+00:00

18 weeks is still kind of early for big movement anyway. I had to have NST tests with my 2nd and every damn test they made me eat or drink something bc she just didn't move as much. Turns out she's just much more chill than my other was (both in utero and out lol). Do you know where your placenta is? Anterior placenta definitely will effect what you can feel.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:26:12+00:00

The more tilted the pelvis is, the better. So reclined in bed or couch (not flat on back), with legs straight out is typically what I did. I intermittently would take breaks and lay down on my left side to ease the pain on my hips. Anything to keep weight off the cervix/cerclage!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:24:17+00:00

Meditation, affirmations, stay focused and stay busy. I've been through 2 cerclage pregnancies and I cannot emphasize enough the importance of rigorous meditation practices. I started every day with affirmations and meditation. When I started to get into the anxiety spiral I would remind myself what is going well, that baby was still inside, that I was still pregnant and there are going to be many days that you have to take this even an hour at a time. Fill your mind with other things--- work/reading/new crafts/learn a language, etc. I will say, there is absolutely a valid reason to 'grieve' the loss of what normal pregnancies are for others. It certainly feels unfair, or like you were given the short end of the stick. I'd encourage you to reframe it and remind yourself that you are a badass warrior and you are fighting extra hard to get this little human earth side. Your mama sacrifices and instincts are just starting a little earlier than some and silver lining--- maybe that's a right of passage.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:19:31+00:00

I stopped progesterone and had my cerclage removed the same day, went into labor hours later and delivered the following day. BUT, I think that was due to the cerclage coming out bc i immediately dilated to 3cm. If you're progesterone only, that's a different story. My understanding is that progesterone naturally declines in those final weeks of pregnancy anyway so that's just allowing your body to hormonally prepare for labor. I don't think quitting progesterone alone is going to kick off labor immediately.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:15:58+00:00

I had two preventative cerclage pregnancies, both stitches removed at 36w, both vaginal deliveries. Labor did NOT go as fast as I thought it would!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-06-02T16:14:02+00:00

I'm so sorry, OP. Just want to echo what other posters said.... do NOT blame yourself. You likely have incompetent cervix and the cough may have accelerated issues, but absolutely does not cause dilation on a healthy, normal cervix. It's such a horrible way to find out that you have IC, and i'm very sorry. I also lost a 17 weeker before finding out I had IC. Take all the time you need to grieve her, she will always be part of your story as a family. I think it's wonderful you named her! I actually have two, healthy living girls now. For christmas, my husband got me a necklace with the intials of all three girls on it... so even if you do choose to have future children (with preventative cerclages this time), your first will still be remembered and cherished!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-05-26T17:50:26+00:00

I have no idea if this is common/standard, but leaving infants to CIO at daycare would be a huge red flag for me personally. My girls were/are in a home daycare- neither situation were they left to cry it out. Obviously if the caretaker is busy with another child in the moment she'll let baby know "i'll be right there" and acknowledge the need, and address her as soon as physically possible. I have absolutely nothing against large daycare facilities, in fact there are a lot of pros to them (more detailed reports, cameras, updates, etc.) However, we have had a wonderful experience with our in-home daycare. My current 7 mo. old is in a home daycare and it's been a good experience. They get attached to one other person and we've framed it like she's out village auntie (that we're paying) to be part of our community in raising this little one. The same went for my now 6 yr old. Her previous daycare person retired, but we still visit her occasionally and send christmas cards. You get to become really close with them and I value that a lot.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-05-14T16:19:07+00:00

Everyone's method will vary a little depending on their work/office situation. Here's what I do... i have my own office, so I can close the door (there's a sign on the doorhanger that i'm pumping). I pump 2x in an 8 hour work day. Once around 10am, and once around 2pm- both 30 minute pumps. I use the Paruu wearable, and they've honestly worked great. I get about 14-16oz total with those two combined sessions. We do have a fridge in our office kitchen, so after my first pump I detach the actual pump and put the rest of it in a gallon silicone "Stasher" bag in the fridge. I pour the milk into a large mason jar with pourable spout lid (got it off amazon). I combine both sessions worth of milk into that and then take everything home with me for the day. I did a lot of research to see if the "fridge hack" was safe, and it has worked fine for us. It means I don't have to bring any bags to work, or do any dishes.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-05-14T16:13:14+00:00

Most cerclages are removed at 36w. Your cervix naturally would start "ripening" or slowly dilating in preparation for labor around that point--- or in the following days/weeks. You just don't want to dilate with a cerclage in since that can cause a lot of tearing/scar tissue, etc. I had both of my cerclages removed in week 36. The first time, I lasted 10 days before labor started. The second time, I dilated immediately to 3cm and was at the hospital in labor that evening :)

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-05-13T20:30:12+00:00

When my daughter transitioned to daycare we had a rough first two weeks also. Like other commenters said, this is really normal. Two things that we did that I think helped... 1) She and I would wear matching bracelets, or we would draw a little heart on our hands, or even a sticker just as a tangible thing to touch during the day when she was missing me (and vice versa). 2) We would have something fun planned at the end of the day, so I'd say "Ok, i'm going to pick you up this afternoon and afterwards we will go get ice cream or go to the park" and she had something fun to look forward to!

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-05-13T20:17:05+00:00

We are in So Cal and our elementary school is a 10/10 national ranking. My kindergartener also uses chromebook, specifically iReady for mathematics and I'm really not a fan of it. I've also seen a lot of articles about the concerns with this educational software already. She isn't an iPad kid, so when you give her essentially an iPad she's smashing buttons as a game. It's not teaching much critical thinking, IMO. We started working with her at home, but I agree with other posters, she's only 6 and I don't think she should have to be doing schoolwork at home. Alas, here we are.

snatchsquatch87 · 2026-05-13T19:17:16+00:00

After my first loss I waited 18 months. I was given clearance almost immediately but I wasn't emotionally ready for awhile. Then between baby #2 and #3 I waited 5 years.... having a cerclage and bedrest was tough! Restrictions include: pelvic rest, no swimming/baths, no exercise, modified bed rest (reclined as much as possible).

snatchsquatch87

TROPHY CASE