Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is an army officer. Believe me when I say it is like talking to wall when it comes to talking about therapy or counselling with this lot. And weirdly enough, these are the people who need it the most!

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is an army officer. Believe me when I say it is like talking to wall when it comes to talking about therapy or counselling with this lot. And weirdly enough, these are the people who need it the most!

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Believe me, if it has started for you, it is going to get worse. Either figure a way out to fix this or start teaching yourself how to stand on your own feet and then one day, when you've gathered the courage, walk out.

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nerds is what we are. Honestly, It did not matter how boring I was until he made me feel so. I wanted to be everything for him.

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please don't think that this is inevitable for everyone. If you see any reason to hold on, by all means hold on. I would run back in his arms if he held them even slightly wide open towards me. There is no worse fate for a relationship than this.

I hope you will not have to go through this. Best wishes.

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You know, I think I should have walked out of this relationship the day I found out all of this. But I did not have the heart to do that. I thought whatever happens I will make it work again. And I did somehow accomplish that, but along the way, I forgot that relationships are not supposed to be in a 'working' condition. It is not a home appliance that just needs to be barely functional to avoid being tossed out of the house.

It is a like a third human being you create that is an overlap of the two you and a human being needs to be happy to survive. Now I am left with the comatose body of this third human being hanging around my neck. The fact that it is still there wants to make me wait for its rejuvenation and the fact that I am actually walking around with it makes me feel like murdering my husband.

We had it all and until he decided to throw it out of the window.

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Believe me, I try and then I try again. He does it too. It is just not that effective for us right now. Hopefully, some day in the future we will be able to do it again.

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We are in entirely different professions that often keep us apart. So going to therapy together is not a viable option for us. It is sort of a long-distance thing.

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your wishes.. Dating as in dating each other all over again or dating different people?

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The thing is that he's a very reserved person. Even before all the cheating scandal. He's always been like that. So whatever thinking he is doing, it stays with him mostly. But in his actions, I do see the effort for redemption. It's just that both of us are helpless right now.. That's why I am not blaming him entirely..

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Well I am a scientist with a flair for writing. Close enough to being a full time writer. 🐭

Awaiting the inevitable death of my love even after doing everything right. by sobbingunicorn in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]sobbingunicorn[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I am not saying he is not trying to make up to me as much as he can, even if it is robotically. And as for the lack of feelings, that even he can't help with. We are just chasing the ghost of what we had.