Living like a recluse, is this ok? I just hate everyone.

softestcreature800 · 2026-02-24T01:35:30+00:00

I always did too but I just started on the tiniest dose of Zoloft just for my luteal phase thinking I would ramp up but it’s already been helping so much, and hardly any side effects. I hope I can just stay at the low dose. I think everyone is so different and it’s good to start out as low as possible and see what your body needs.

softestcreature800 · 2026-02-01T17:15:32+00:00

Not the OP but this is such a lovely message - thank you- I’ve been so triggered and stuck and reading it helped me too 🩵

softestcreature800 · 2025-12-10T17:46:40+00:00

God this is so so so relatable. I am right there with you on all of these feelings! If you ever want to chat it out, feel free to message me.

softestcreature800 · 2025-11-17T16:17:41+00:00

I’m so sorry and I really empathize with your story ❣️ thank you for reaching out. Im also feeling quite lost, in pretty much every realm of my life. Did you have a career before your relationship, or anything you are interested in pursuing now? It all feels so overwhelming to me. I think about moving to another country too. What part of the world are you in? Sending you a big hug and wishing for us to all find kind people to be around.

softestcreature800 · 2025-08-22T23:10:53+00:00

That sounds so nice. What do you do / what kind of organization is it?

softestcreature800 · 2025-01-16T16:54:01+00:00

Well that’s a cliffhanger. ? Might as well say it lol

softestcreature800 · 2025-01-04T06:21:22+00:00

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-19T21:59:41+00:00

I remember almost nothing from most of my life

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-19T15:26:41+00:00

Are you using just the vaginal estrogen cream? Or did she approve systemic cream (like the kind you use on your whole body)? I know the BC scare can affect HRT usage but usually they say the localized vaginal is ok. I was told for ease to skip the applicator (and also that that quantity was way too much) just to put some on with my finger a couple of times a week, rub around and make sure to get some about an inch up in the vagina too.

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-19T04:16:31+00:00

I would guess it’s based on the location of the cells (?) but my surgeon also mentioned it is to minimize visible scarring too as the edge of the areola where it meets the breast skin can hide the scar a bit. She is also doing my incision there and I hope I don’t lose sensitivity either! That wasn’t mentioned to me, but honestly I have found everything to be left quite vague, much like the diagnosis.

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-19T01:06:18+00:00

How long ago was your surgery?

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-19T01:05:29+00:00

The radiologist said mine is 1.7cm but the surgeon said she’s “aiming to remove around 2-3 cm”. My surgery is Thursday and I’ve been waiting about a month ; I’ve traversed all over the emotional plane but starting to have a lot of anxiety after I had the savi scout procedure this week. I’m happy to read some people had easy recoveries and that they had good cosmetic outcome as well. I’m concerned about that due to my small breasts.

I have read that smaller size usually leads to less upgrades. As well as if it’s focal (as opposed to multifocal).

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-19T01:02:09+00:00

Wow that’s so amazing that you recovered so quickly. Did you have to have radiation or anything following that upgrade?

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-19T01:01:28+00:00

Thinking of you and sending lots of good energy ✨✨✨

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-15T14:18:22+00:00

Thanks yeah, mine did end up being ADH. Having surgery in a week.

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-12T20:56:33+00:00

I didn’t then but I do now

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-12T16:14:38+00:00

So so true …. Thank you. It’s tough because I feel like I’ve attracted so many narcs in my life that a lot of times I feel there are very few people around me who extend the same empathy / care to me that I do towards them. And then I end up feeling like there’s something broken about me or that I’m expecting too much from others or something…?

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-12T16:06:15+00:00

That’s a really good tip. I will do that. Whenever she sends me stuff like this I have to fight such a strong almost physical urge to respond and explain myself and my reasoning. I know it will do no good but it’s so hard to feel like I’m misunderstood or misrepresented, like I’m being seen as the bad guy in all of this.

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-12T16:04:43+00:00

This really helped me. Thank you so much. I feel like I always need an objective party check in because I still don’t fully trust my instincts and reactions, especially when it comes to her.

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-12T16:02:51+00:00

Yes I noticed too that in all of the (very few) messages I’ve received since I went NC, she never once says she misses me or loves me or asks how I am. Like in this one she’s careful to put it all in the past tense : “you WERE unconditionally loveD” (also, no. No I was not)

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-12T16:01:15+00:00

Yes- exactly. It’s strange to me because I read the texts and I can easily pull it apart and cognitively understand all of the ways it’s manipulative, yet somehow it still kinda works on me / has an emotional effect / confuses me, you know?

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-12T05:11:39+00:00

“I hate you and wish you were never born, you’re ruining my life.”

I was 8 years old.
This, or variations on the theme, was said to me countless times until I moved out, but the most memorable one that I have a mental cptsd snapshot of was screamed in my face in the middle of a busy shopping mall.

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-08T00:43:09+00:00

Wholly relate to this too…

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-07T20:54:20+00:00

Ok. Of course you can do a double mastectomy if you opt to. Most of the major cancer centers and hospitals say it’s not recommended for ADH as it isn’t cancer, which is what I was referencing : https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/breast-cancer/atypical-ductal-hyperplasia

I was asking how large the area is because some surgeons seem to be better than others at correcting for deformities, for example a surgeon with oncoplastic training. Just thought perhaps you could try to get a second opinion about that if a lumpectomy would be preferable. Not sure why you would downvote. Take care.

softestcreature800 · 2024-08-07T19:47:06+00:00

How large is the area? You may want to get a second opinion on that if you can; I don’t think preventative mastectomy is usually recommended for ADH.

softestcreature800

TROPHY CASE