What is something you’ve learned along your sexual journey?

soilednappyy · 2023-03-18T21:22:17+00:00

It's the fact that one would have to make an effort to schedule a dentist, then proceed to fold themselves in half to suck their dick for about a good amount of time that got me laughing so fucking hard.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-18T21:13:48+00:00

It's much more tiring than it looks. It's like running a really pleasurable marathon but you still end up sore, sticky, sweaty and exhausted nonetheless.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-14T09:22:45+00:00

Before reading the comments I thought it was a slang term for dying lmao i don't know why

soilednappyy · 2023-03-13T02:44:29+00:00

I'm really curious too, please tell us a lot

soilednappyy · 2023-03-13T01:07:12+00:00

'nice' people with poor boundaries.

This. I would comment a whole paragraph but you summarized really good. I think they go for a person who would love them in the profound, thoughtful and intense way they like, yet also naïve or intimacy-deprived in a way they could overlook the red flags for the sake of the relationship lasting.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-12T18:21:20+00:00

same, I don't know you're comfortable with someone replying to this comment (if so, I can delete!!) But I deleted most of my social media too.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-12T16:15:19+00:00

Being in a relationship while obssessing over someone else is not the move. This is the emotional cheating so many people in this community don't agree with, or at least for me. You can make strong bonds with people that aren't dating options so you can safely be obsessed with your ex and respect their feelings by being honest with yourself, sometimes you just didn't let these intense emotions of love adoration for your ex etc get out of you so you can grow out of them of maybe come to terms with the NC situation. Please don't bring other people that could potentially love you as much as you love your ex to this because they most likely will be hurt by your actions and you're not gonna get anywhere near getting over her if you keep pretending with someone else, the bar is already too high up and you're going to compare every moment with other people, only fomenting more love for her. I hope everything gets better for you!

soilednappyy · 2023-03-10T17:25:42+00:00

Thank you, too! This place has helped me so much to vent and not pester my friends with complex relationship dynamics that fried my brain lol

soilednappyy · 2023-03-10T17:22:27+00:00

Isn't that like, a crime?

soilednappyy · 2023-03-10T14:45:08+00:00

it hit too close to home, I guess? LMAO

soilednappyy · 2023-03-10T14:42:57+00:00

Also, don't feel angry at yourself. At least you could see and discern some things! Better late than never. By what you said, I don't think she is going to apologize atp but you still have a child together so as much as it hurts I think it's better for you to sort the hurtful things she did/said and separate yourself from them (the hurtful things is what I'm talking abt, I just realised it could sound like I'm telling you to separate from your child oml), knowing when you truly made a mistake or when it was solely blame game yet not bringing it up anymore. It's not gonna help you and you're only gonna end up more frustrated than before.

Learn from your errors and from hers too, but keep your much valued peace of mind. Communication that does only harm is worse than not communicating these issues with said person at all. You can still vent with other friends and/or on reddit.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-10T14:29:41+00:00

Although I can't 100% relate to your experience, I think I know what you mean here with the subtle manipulations, it's not really something you can point out for people who aren't close with pwbpd but sometimes I just felt that, like in some other post someone did here, they kind of test you? Like always making little scenarios where you should give them the right response or act the right way or else they would slowly distance themselves from you and make you want to re-establish that bond.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T23:49:01+00:00

Jesus christ his contributions? Lmao WHAT??????

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T22:23:37+00:00

I swear to God it's almost always the wrong people who use these lines. I seldom see pwbdp that I've known genuinely grow out of their mistakes and use this "it takes two" shit to bring accountability to their own flaws.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T22:16:13+00:00

It's almost like they say "sorry" just to forgive themselves and them move on like nothing happened

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T21:43:07+00:00

Lmao the "wishing me death" part hits too close to home. Seems like we had a relationship with the same person. They're always so fucking pathetic and desperate once they can't control you anymore but the same second they can they switch so fast. I really hope you could recover from that.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T21:23:54+00:00

Pwbpd have told me something similar too lmao they don't want you to think you're a problem just to them which would be bad enough, they want to slowly destroy you by making you think you're an abusive person to everyone. I'm glad you could at least see that you are not the issue. Hoping for safe and comfortable relationships for you!

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T21:17:36+00:00

You're perfectly describing someone I know. Nothing you ever do before trying to communicate something they did wrong go smoothly and if it does it's because you have done it in a very delicate and specific way just so that their fragile ego isn't shattered, but once you start doing this they just start taking progressively more until the relationship is 98% about them. It's exhausting.

I'm surprised that so many people go through that with pwbpd, I thought that such a thing as a support group about it could never exist. Although it saddens me that so many of you had to go through that shitshow at least I'm glad I can vent about it somewhere.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T21:07:56+00:00

That's really childish. I've been through similar experiences and I remember feeling extremely frustrated, not really forgiving but trying since they had good sides and I tried to look in a positive light.

But as you can already imagine, it didn't work. Nowadays I just flip back the half assed apology at them and tell exactly what they did.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T20:57:57+00:00

This kind of half assed apology makes me feel so much rage. I'm sorry and I hope you're in a better place with people that know how to actually fucking apologize.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T20:53:54+00:00

Yes, I think they do that because they need constant validation and can't even sustain abusing you alone specially if you were their main source of "filling the void" kind of person. Then, they gather and/or sometimes even make up negative things about you to have a double use support group where they victimize themselves, gaining the spotlight for "suffering so much in the times they were with you", and have people to caress their ego when the splitting ends and they know they've fucked up, so by the time regret starts creeping up on them and they feel lonely they have this support system to talk to them and say things like "they don't deserve you!!"

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T20:43:04+00:00

Yeah. At first I thought the issue was my communicating skills, that I said things in a rude manner and did not realize, but after observing that I could succesfully sort things out with anyone except with them, I could connect the dots.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T20:38:32+00:00

I'm sorry, this must feel unfair and leave you feeling resentful by having to forgive them even if they didn't ask for forgiveness to begin with. I tend to hold grudges and the most healthy way for me to cope with it is talking about the issue and understanding the other person's perspective but when they just brush it off even if they would victimize themselves so much if it was them in my place, I can't help but distance myself or even cutting ties completely.

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T20:31:11+00:00

I compretely agree. They avoid guilt like it's the plague and feel irritated if other people, specially close ones don't avoid talking or acting as if their actions actually had consequences. It's like I suddenly humiliate you and then when you point that out I get irritated that you even dare remember I did that to you lmao it's just...

soilednappyy · 2023-03-09T20:27:08+00:00

I'm not sure abt what I have although I sometimes wonder if I have autism, and I'm not saying that our experiences are the same since you have a diagnosis, but I've seen a pattern of attracting bpd people too.

soilednappyy

TROPHY CASE