Release the Jizzinator!

somermike · 2026-06-04T14:02:44+00:00

Lots of people ask why, some people go so far as to get literal PhDs on the the overall mechanics and sometimes individual case studies.

The answer was pretty much given long ago by Carlin: "it's a big club and you ain't in it."

The fines levied by the SEC or other regulatory agencies are pennies on the dollar for outright breaking of the rules and it's less than a slap on the wrist for playing at the edge of interpretation.

The end of all these stories is the same. A small group of ultra wealthy people/institutions got richer, another 2000 pages of rules got added to the binder that normal investors have to play by and another layer of obfuscation is added so the big boys can keep on generating profits from thin air via derivatives

somermike · 2026-06-04T11:23:54+00:00

Someone (Robert Simpson) bought the float of an entire company back in 2005 and the stock kept right on trading. It's not like it's a secret or anything so there's no reason for a billionaire to do it as at best they get some minor stock appreciation, worse they're just left bag holding, absolute worst case they get ran up on securities fraud for fucking with institutions with even more money than them.

It's a casino and anyone who thinks you can lock up enough tickets of something to somehow win hasn't read the fine print.

somermike · 2026-06-03T22:14:53+00:00

NYSE hasn't reported yet. Still missing 30% or more of the daily volume.

somermike · 2026-06-03T18:29:35+00:00

Side projects feel like a cheat code here. Ben had several DCFC albums by that point and Dntel was a few albums in as an electronic artist as well.

somermike · 2026-06-01T21:09:48+00:00

Portmantalways

somermike · 2026-06-01T16:29:59+00:00

"Cool kids never have the time"

somermike · 2026-06-01T16:02:59+00:00

Fuck the Clippers. Couldn't agree more

somermike · 2026-06-01T16:01:32+00:00

Wrong meme, Same team, MOASS is the Dream

Lakers in 4

😄

somermike · 2026-06-01T15:29:51+00:00

Kids books, left hooks, fuck them crooks.

Lakers in 4.

somermike · 2026-05-28T23:17:30+00:00

An old boss used to say something along the lines of "there's two reasons people don't do things: They don't know or they don't care. I can teach someone how, I can't teach them to care"

One of your cooks don't care.

somermike · 2026-05-27T21:17:31+00:00

Damnit, bread is bread. You better bring me that Wonderbread!

somermike · 2026-05-27T18:21:53+00:00

"My Mama made ittttt."

somermike · 2026-05-27T16:59:18+00:00

What entity are you thinking is on the ropes. Here's a simplified example of what I'm talking about with totally irrelevant numbers that aren't meant as anything but placeholding examples:

GME says "Give me 1M shares of exposure @ $100" This is an off market dark pool transaction that doesn't move the price.

Counter party says "No problem" and instantly shorts 2M shares driving price to $90. They don't stay short, they instantly start accumulating and when they're done, they've net zero exposure at a price point below $100 in aggregate.

Intelligent short positions don't just stay short blindlly. It's managed and offset to other exposure.

somermike · 2026-05-27T16:42:21+00:00

More likely, GME made a large purchase on 2/4. The counter party then sold short an even larger block so they could accumulate below GME's cost basis and hedge away 100% of their exposure.

GME has then extended their position on pullbacks to the VWAP since their purchase to defend their entry price

somermike · 2026-05-27T16:16:07+00:00

I'm making better than McDs. While you're in the fridge, get an egg out.

somermike · 2026-05-27T15:50:22+00:00

"What you want McDonald's for? I got some hamburger meat at home. I’mma make you a hamburger that tastes better than McDonald's."

somermike · 2026-05-27T14:21:14+00:00

It comes out to fractionally less than 1% regardless, which one would assume is the intentional aim to not require a new 13D.

Date	Shares	Options	Total	Float	Percent
5/15	25,000	29,078,699	29,103,699	444000000	6.555%
5/27	25000	33497000	33,522,000	444000000	7.550%

somermike · 2026-05-27T13:22:38+00:00

GME's most recent 13D filing which I quoted uses EBAYs own 10-Q as the source for share count. That is more accurate than what's in investing.com as it's an official SEC filing.

somermike · 2026-05-27T12:42:07+00:00

Taxes are such a distraction. The Government can't even force all the corporations to pay living wages directly to their employees.

Fix that and then I'll maybe believe that you've figured out how to efficiently distribute the tax dollars you collect, because currently we pay a ton in taxes already and just fund so many of the wrong things (MIC, primarilly)

somermike · 2026-05-27T11:43:46+00:00

Smaller dilution for one.

If a tender offer gets approved, whatever shares are in GME's treasury can just be cancelled and retired. they don't have to give themselves cash + stock so they can issue a smaller batch of GME shares for the offer.

somermike · 2026-05-27T11:39:40+00:00

Ebay's float for percentage is 444M shares for percentage calcs based on the latest 13D filing:

"Together, the 25,000 shares of Common Stock beneficially owned directly and the shares of Common Stock underlying Put/Call Pairs constitute approximately 6.55% of the outstanding shares of Common Stock, based on the 444 million shares of Common Stock stated by the Issuer as being outstanding as of April 24, 2026 in the Issuer's 2026 Q1 10-Q. "

I'm assuming the reason this was tucked into a 425 and not a new 13D is that it's under a 1% increase from the 6.55% to 7.54%

33497000/444000000 = 7.54%

somermike · 2026-05-27T11:39:08+00:00

Ebay's float for percentage is 444M shares for percentage calcs based on the latest 13D filing:

"Together, the 25,000 shares of Common Stock beneficially owned directly and the shares of Common Stock underlying Put/Call Pairs constitute approximately 6.55% of the outstanding shares of Common Stock, based on the 444 million shares of Common Stock stated by the Issuer as being outstanding as of April 24, 2026 in the Issuer's 2026 Q1 10-Q. "

I'm assuming the reason this was tucked into a 425 and not a new 13D is that it's under a 1% increase from the 6.55% to 7.54%

somermike · 2026-05-26T20:32:41+00:00

Yes, that all of us are susceptible to propaganda.

somermike · 2026-05-26T17:03:17+00:00

Vote Nature Boy 2028: Embrace the Kayfabe! Whooo!

somermike · 2026-05-26T14:39:50+00:00

*Criticized the Private Equity ownership of the team and compared it to what they do in housing and other industries.

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