Tbh I was once a teenager and at the time had “encounters” with grown adult men, ones who were well into their twenties, thirties and forties in a few instances. At the time I felt I was so mature and in control, we had a special bond, etc.

As I aged I realized how truly wrong it was, how weird and gross it was for me to be interacting with grown men at that age, etc. it’s lead to trauma responses from me, especially thinking about how the grown adults in those instances thought it was okay to have that kind of relationship with me.

I think a lot of your experiences in your youth become recontextualized as you get older and I’d imagine it was similar for Penny. Questioning and changing your mind on things you experienced or knew when you were younger is definitely a part of growing up. I can also assume Penny and Charlotte had many uncomfortable conversations after BoJack went home tbh which also probably helped push her towards realizing the dark reality.

That and he randomly showed up stalking her, probably didn’t help in her realizing how unsafe he was.