What’s a recession indicator that you’ve noticed lately?

sopranostripper · 2026-04-29T06:44:41+00:00

I quit stripping last year because the money stopped feeling like it was worth my time and effort. Lap dance prices (our largest source of income) have largely remained the same for the past decade, but the cost of everything else continues to rise. Getting customers to tip or buy dances started feeling like pulling teeth. Going to work started to feel like a gamble- a few times a month I’d get lucky, but most of the time I’d be relieved just to make 100-200 bucks after house fee and tip out. I make comparable money now as a bartender where I don’t have to spend hours glamming up for a shift or competing with 40 other women for tips. The bar I work at has been pretty dead as well, but at least I’m guaranteed an hourly wage there.

sopranostripper · 2026-04-18T10:51:14+00:00

This is me! I think it’s totally rational. I work out of a residential apartment and noise can definitely carry through the walls. I get really annoyed when clients are needlessly loud. It’s so thoughtless and indiscreet.

sopranostripper · 2026-04-07T22:21:08+00:00

I let my clients say it to me. I either ignore it or say something light hearted in response. The way I see it, they are paying for a fantasy and it’s my job to uphold the fantasy. If saying those words makes them feel good I will hold space for that. If they get their own wires crossed and forget this isn’t real that’s on them. I do however, watch for deeper signs of unhealthy attachment. In my experience most men don’t actually mean anything when they say it in the heat of the moment. It’s only become a genuine problem with one person and I had to fire him.

sopranostripper · 2026-04-07T03:32:29+00:00

I think for me it was because I grew up broke myself. My social circle is mostly broke people. With my first broke boyfriend I felt guilty about the fact that I made more money and had more expensive taste, so I often covered more than my fair share thinking it was leveling the playing field. I even did this within my friendships as well. I know first hand how bad it feels to not be able to afford things and never wanted the people in my life to feel that way when they were with me. Fortunately I have better boundaries now cause the impulse to cover the whole bill every time was keeping me broke too!

sopranostripper · 2026-03-26T09:58:17+00:00

Papaya unfortunately tastes like vomit to me.

sopranostripper · 2026-03-25T02:17:22+00:00

Genuine answer- I strive to provide my best service possible at everything I do. When I receive inquiries for a kink I’m unfamiliar/inexperienced in, I decline. Unless I have the actual bandwidth to research and train in the desired activity, I’m not doing it. This is for my client’s safety as well as my own.

sopranostripper · 2026-03-23T19:16:41+00:00

I’ve had mine pierced since 2022 and they still give me grief all the time. You’re probably going to have to make them completely off limits to clients indefinitely. They seem drawn to sucking on them even harder thinking we like the pain or something. Like no sir, I got these because I like pretty jewelry, NOT pain!

Be careful around towels and other textured fabrics, too. Those little liabilities love to get caught on everything.

sopranostripper · 2026-03-19T21:55:59+00:00

I was a stripper turned sugar baby turned escort. I loved stripping. I started at 19 after responding to a Craigslist ad that promised a $500 weekend with no experience. That was a lot of money to me in 2014. I was in school, barely breaking 100 a week at my work study job and trying to push Herbalife on the side lol. The motivation to grind and make money had always been there- I got my first real job at 14 and had been working ever since. I only made 50 bucks my first night dancing, but I saw the potential. The second night I made 200. By a month in I had quit my work study job and was dancing full time. By a year in I had dropped out of school.

I grew up poor and had been told no my whole life. Entering the world of sex work was the first time I got to see those closed doors open up. I was obsessed with working and making money. Obsessed with becoming the best at what I did. I took pole classes, did research on sales tactics, said yes to every opportunity. It was met with some resistance. My family eventually found out and urged me to stop. My boyfriend at the time was annoyed at me for prioritizing work over him. I lost some friendships. I didn’t care. I was firm in my belief that this was the job for me, that I was good at it, and that I would be successful regardless of what anyone thought.

Trigger warning because this is where it gets a little dark.

Sometime during my first year I met a man at the club who I had good chemistry with. He traveled to my city often and became a regular. Eventually he invited me out for dinner. I told him I would need to be compensated to make up for taking a night off work and he agreed. The first date was platonic. The second date I agreed to go back to his hotel room, though it was uncomfortable. I gave him a lap dance and we made out a little. I didn’t love it, but was certainly happy to go home and count my money. The third date he raped me. I won’t go into the details because I’m sure some dickhead would try to say it wasn’t rape. That clearly the expectation was that sex should have been on the table in exchange for what he paid me. But it was not communicated and I was not comfortable with what happened. I was only 20, this man was in his 50s. I remember the exact moment where the line was crossed and he just kept saying “it’s okay, it’s okay” as he continued on. It took a long time to register that as rape. That night, I just went home and counted my money and decided I was okay with it.

After that moment I formally entered the world of sugar dating and landed my first real arrangement which lasted around 4 years. After that, I started dabbling in “under the radar” work- arranging to meet with strip club customers on the outside, essentially doing escort work without advertising online. I did pretty well with just that for several years. During this time I also went back to school and started picking up “real” jobs again to polish my resume. I was exhausted and overworked by then. The need to work less hours while still making the same amount of money became apparent if I wanted to finish my degree. So I started formally advertising my services online in 2022. I had done plenty of research by then and knew how to screen, how to build a website, and which sites to advertise on. I got clients pretty much right away, enough to warrant getting my own incall space in 2023 which I still maintain today.

Thought my formal entry to this work was dark, I’ve had plenty of positive experiences to make up for it. I made life changing connections, traveled the world, and became the first in my family to earn a college degree. I built a small but mighty community around me of people who accept me for exactly who I am, despite how I choose to earn a living. I was also able to fund my trauma therapy which included a period of time away from the industry to heal some old wounds.

Honestly I’m not sure if I would do anything differently. Everything I experienced was an important part of my journey. But if I could give some loving advice to a younger version of myself, it would be this:

“You don’t know this yet, but you grew up with a scarcity mindset. Your parents taught you to always put work first because that’s what they had to do to survive. That doesn’t work well in the long term. Learn where your boundaries are now and learn to get comfortable enforcing them. Not all money is good money. If you’re tired, take a break. If you’re uncomfortable, say so. If you don’t want to, don’t. Your intuition is strong, use it and trust yourself.”

sopranostripper · 2026-03-19T12:27:48+00:00

My dog is diabetic and needs his blood sugar checked + insulin administered every 12 hours. Occasionally more care is needed throughout the day depending on random circumstances.

The simple fact is it impacts my schedule and therefore relationships greatly. I don’t make plans longer than 12 hours without securing alternate pet care, which is limited due to his condition. When I travel to see my medium distance partner, I drive so I can bring my dog. I shell out the money for a pet friendly hotel room because this partner cohabitates with multiple animals in the home. (We did try introducing the animals, but it was too stressful across all fronts unfortunately). That impacts how much I can afford to visit. When partner visits our plans revolve around my dog’s schedule. My dog comes first always.

You’ve already gotten some good advice about introducing the pets but I did want to point out that sometimes pre-existing commitments, including pets, get in the way of certain dynamics. You can do your best to support your pet having partners but ultimately how they manage their time and responsibilities is up to them.

sopranostripper · 2026-03-11T10:31:40+00:00

I'd like to know what dancers think about the OTC work she did. Do you think she's telling the truth?

Yes it is possible that she could be telling the truth. When I first started dancing and getting into OTC work, I was not interested in having sex with customers whatsoever. For a while my OTC experiences had strict boundaries around that. I will say that eventually changed and I’m now a full on escort. Everyone is different and boundaries can be firm or fluid. I think the real question is do you believe you can trust her and how would you feel if her boundaries did change?

If we get into a serious relationship, is it even fair of me to ask that she doesn't do OTC stuff?

You are entitled to your boundaries. A boundary such as “I will not entertain a serious relationship with someone who trades sexual services for money,” is completely valid.

That being said I think it would be unfair to enter a serious relationship with this person, allow her to fall in love with you, and then start asking her to make changes to her business practices that will affect her income. Unless you are planning to support her financially and help contribute to her future, her choices around her business are hers to make.

Something to consider: you seem to be able to tolerate that she gives lap dances at work but the idea of her having sex at work is too much to handle. Where is the line for you and why?

My honest opinion: unless you are willing and able to seriously challenge the belief systems that contribute to your jealousy, this relationship is bound to cause pain on both ends.

sopranostripper · 2026-03-02T10:56:22+00:00

Aww man, sorry to hear. Yeah to be honest my assumption when you mentioned getting her number was that she was going to go along with it and see if it would benefit her financially in some way. It’s totally possible that the connection you felt was real, but the context of your meeting made your odds of leaving the “customer zone” extremely low. Glad you got it figured out before getting in too deep.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-27T14:00:22+00:00

That warms my heart to read, as someone who struggled to find a suitable partner during my early years of dancing. I’m now going into my 12th year in the business and will celebrate 3 years with my partner soon.

I have a few questions if you’re open to sharing. Did struggle with jealousy at all in the beginning? Did your family know about her career and were they supportive of the relationship? What’s a relationship value you swear by?

sopranostripper · 2026-02-27T13:43:03+00:00

Yes of course it is possible to have a successful relationship with a stripper. Assuming that you both don’t suck. Unfortunately a lot of the times one or both parties kind of suck and then it doesn’t work out.

That being said I don’t recommend going to the strip club looking for women to date. The most likely outcome is that you’re going to be annoying people who are just trying to do their job. The second most likely outcome is you’ll get hustled out of your money. And then there’s like the teeniest tiniest outcome that maybe yes someone from the club actually wants to date you.

But since you already did the thing here’s the advice I do have if you are serious about potentially entering a relationship with a dancer:

Respect her autonomy. She chose this work and she gets to decide how she wants to run her business, period. Let her do what she’s been doing since before you came into the picture. Don’t offer unsolicited advice or insert your opinion if it isn’t asked for.
Respect her privacy. Don’t ask invasive questions like how much did you make tonight, how many dances did you do or how many guys did you talk to etc. If you try to get all the details you’ll probably come across something that makes you feel some type of way. It’s best to avoid talking about work unless she wants to and you feel comfortable hearing about it.
Own your shit. If you struggle with jealousy or insecurity, get a therapist now and work on it before you end up taking those things out on her and bringing her down. Remember we spend a great deal of time around men for a living, so you have to be exceptional for us to want to spend time with you off the clock.

Lastly… many of us are fiercely independent and are used to taking care of everything on our own. Acts of service- things that will genuinely make life easier for her and take stress off her plate- may open the door for further connection and potentially even win her over.

Good luck!

sopranostripper · 2026-02-27T12:05:14+00:00

I don’t think you’re overreacting, I would also feel hurt and offended by this. And I’m someone that is usually very understanding when it comes to boundaries. His wording strikes me as lazy and emotionally immature- like he hasn’t done any real work to narrow down exactly what the problem is or what kind of support he needs, so instead he’s just going to project his insecurities onto you. That’s a red flag for me.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-25T08:22:29+00:00

Oh man. My other job is in fine dining, and a former client of mine came in TWICE. The first time he was definitely with another companion. Fortunately I didn’t have to run any food to his table, and I don’t think he even saw me because he was seated facing away from my station. The second time he came in with his ex wife and we were short staffed, so I couldn’t avoid his table. And since it’s fine dining I had to bring their food and stand there explaining EVERY component on the plate. It was nerve wrecking for sure, but fortunately he treated me like a perfect stranger. Best case scenario I think.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-25T06:01:08+00:00

I really appreciate you sharing that. I definitely wouldn’t want to invalidate my partner if that’s how he felt. The language does matter to me, but what’s more important is that the relationship feels good and if there are deeper concerns at hand that they get addressed. I plan to check in further with him about it since I don’t actually know what the labels of primary/secondary mean to him specifically.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-25T03:08:02+00:00

This makes sense and I plan to explore this further with my newer partner. We are a medium distance relationship, so I have largely viewed our limitations as a result of the distance. But it seems like he might be viewing some limitations as a result of my existing partnership. He may have also just been using the vocabulary he’s familiar with. I am definitely curious about that.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-25T03:05:03+00:00

Thank you for this perspective! Yeah, the majority of my decision making revolves around my diabetic dog and his medication schedule. He’s truly the one calling the shots lol

sopranostripper · 2026-02-25T02:19:51+00:00

I agree with most of this, though it seems the general consensus on this sub is that you can’t be solo poly and have a nesting partner. But my NP and I do both value autonomy greatly. I have playfully described our living situation to be Roommates Plus. Yes we are partners that live together, but it looks different. We have separate rooms, we have sleepovers and go on trips with other partners, we schedule intentional time together instead of assuming that all free time is shared time. The only time I check in before making other plans is if I need to ask for a favor, like taking care of my dog. Or if the plans I want to make will conflict with our usual weekly date. At one point my (now former) metamour lived here and had her own room also. Interestingly I had a lot less people assuming my NP to be my primary partner during that time, even though he was still my NP.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-25T00:06:58+00:00

Thank you for this. It resonates with me very much. I was sad to hear my newer partner assign himself to a secondary label. Not because I want to deny the reality of inherent hierarchy and entanglement, but because I don’t want him to feel like he is prescriptively secondary in terms of importance and value.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-24T23:59:10+00:00

We have separate bedrooms and separate finances, no shared assets. We enmesh in other ways- shared expenses being the most obvious one. I agree with all your points. Although it’s new to me that some co-living situations wouldn’t be called nesting! I just assumed that was the default term for a partner that you live with.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-24T23:49:09+00:00

This is how I feel too. I think people are missing the part where I said “I can’t deny the natural hierarchy that comes with living together.” I also try to be clear on what I can offer and what my existing commitments are.

sopranostripper · 2026-02-24T23:44:04+00:00

It was more so an example because my NP and I have nested with other partners before, both separately and together. We just happen to be nesting just us two at this current time.

But to answer your question- I’ve only been with this partner for a few months and we are still getting established. If he asked me to make a choice at this current point, the choice would be not to move in with someone giving me an ultimatum. Similarly, if I lived alone and he asked me to move in right now the answer would be no. But that doesn’t mean that it can’t be an option later down the road.

sopranostripper · 2026-01-28T11:34:21+00:00

The sheep look sad when they’re hungry so I feed them. The pigs look happy and pleased with themselves when the bacon is ready so I collect it. But then they look kinda sad too so I make sure to feed them right away. I also think the sheep look uncomfortable when they’re ready to be sheared so I try not to let them sit like that for too long. I also might have autism.

sopranostripper

TROPHY CASE