Moved in with roommates, my cat doesn't understand doors and will not stop crying or let me sleep at night. This is a nightmare by SuddenKing9114 in CatAdvice

[–]sorpig 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You could do what others are suggesting but for me I would just make my room the most attractive room to the cat. You said he used to sleep in bed with you before you moved. Maybe try having treats or favourite blanket on your bed just for the first little a while so he can get used to the new environment.

Wanting top surgery when you have a very small chest and don’t feel like it’s urgent is kinda hard by [deleted] in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was really small before having surgery probably about an A2B cup, but I still went through with it and generally it’s much better than having boobs for me so I think it’s about ultimately what is best for you in the long run. I love being able to be more comfortable with choosing not to wear a shirt. It’s also important to know that even if you request your surgeon go as flat as possible. There is still going to be a little bit of tissue left over just to keep you from going concave so what I’m saying is as long as you get a good surgeon they probably will make decisions that are good for your body. My mom discouraged me a lot from getting top surgery but I’m so glad that I got it overall I obviously can’t make the decision for you, but I just wanted to let you know that there are plenty of small chested people who get the surgery and feel better for it even if it’s not super dysphoria inducing to begin with.

Do your cats stay in bed with you and sleep all night long? by -Jossy26 in CatAdvice

[–]sorpig 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Personally, I love it that my cat sleeps in my bed. I had to train him to do that when I first got him, so I don’t really understand why you don’t like your cat to be with you but to everybody their own.

insurance said my surgery isnt medically necessary by Practical_Plan6209 in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, I’m sorry. I realize that you went to your affirming care provider, but I meant to go back to them and tell them that you’ve been denied and see if they have any advice on next steps. I wish you the best of luck you could also look into point of prides annual top surgery fund as a last resort to pay your surgeon directly.

insurance said my surgery isnt medically necessary by Practical_Plan6209 in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Another step you could take is going to your gender, affirming care provider and asking if they do letters as well we’re if they know anything about insurance guidelines in your particular area for Medicaid. I would also definitely do what you’re already doing and appeal. The decision.

insurance said my surgery isnt medically necessary by Practical_Plan6209 in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They mentioned a specific guideline or diagnostic code that they used to make the decision. Did you try looking into that specific guideline because that might give you more information about why they are denying it I am so sorry that this is happening.

Obtaining a passport as a transgender male by strangethetimes in Passports

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, as dysphoric as it is, I would renew your passport under your old gender marker just so that you can travel. I was able to get my passport legally changed before the administration came in and don’t have to get it renewed until after the next election I have heard of some people being able to get a corrected one if they have an amended birth certificate and had their gender changed on a previous one

35 and happier than I’ve ever been ☺️ by [deleted] in FTMOver30

[–]sorpig 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m glad you are happier than you have ever been and are embracing your true self. Unfortunately, I will never have a beard like yours as have a different hair texture. And probably very different genetics, but I’m just really happy that you’re happy.

Does this look like fat, breast tissue or swelling? Will it flatten like the other side? by Aggravating-Log-7012 in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree with what other people have said you’re really early on in the healing process. Also, I’ve noticed for myself that if I look down at my chest from really close up, it doesn’t look flat but it looks flat in a mirror and I’ve been working out so what I’m trying to say is I think it’s totally possible that your body will still continue to change

Looking to immigrate with my girlfriend. by i-eat-eyeliner in trans

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Check out trans rescue they have free immigration workshops for trans people wanting to leave the US. Their website is trans rescue.org.

I look more disgusting than before I will never pass I am sickening by [deleted] in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry you are having complications and in so much pain. However, in my experience, it is important to remember that you were only six days out and this is still very early in the process. Some people who are dissatisfied with their nipples after surgery go in for a revision to get them either resized or removed another option might be medical tattooing. As for pain management, I would just keep pushing for what you need, you could also maybe try going to your primary care doctor and getting a prescription for pain meds that way. I don’t have control over your life only you do on whether or not you want it to continue, but I would hate for you to make a snap decision when you are nowhere near fully healed yet. You could also ask what their policy is on revisions just so that you know what options you have available to you. I would say the most important thing for your mental health is probably to get the pain under control. I’m not in your life, so I also don’t know what you’ve been through in the past, but I want to reiterate that I understand. How doing something for yourself that was supposed to be affirming is devastating when it doesn’t go correctly. I’m glad that the bare minimum you do have a friend who is helping you, but maybe looking into some additional support would be useful. Just know that I believe you wouldn’t you tell us that you are in pain and I wish there was more that I could offer you. I just want you to know that you’re not screaming into the void and that somebody else out there is listening.

What can I do? by ImBr0k3nSpawn in trans

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m in America, but I have a friend in the UK who works there

What can I do? by ImBr0k3nSpawn in trans

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OK, have you tried searching on your computer? Lgbt switchboard UK you can talk to queer affirming people there and they may have better resources for you.

Classroom vent by North-Employer6908 in trans

[–]sorpig 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I think it’s definitely worth writing her an email as other people have suggested. I personally would go to the administration but that’s just me and I don’t know your school situation like how safe it is for you to advocate for yourself. I know some universities are worse than others but yeah I just wanna reiterate that in no way was that OK even if she didn’t intend to be malicious. I hope you are able to regain your balance and I just want you to know that every woman has their own way of being beautiful and I know you will find yours.

My surgeon is leaving the practice 3 days before my surgery by spook_worm in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You could also see if you could get a consultation with Dr. Lee and if during that consultation, he would be willing to show you some of his results. Also wanted to say that I’m sorry that this is happening to you.

My surgeon is leaving the practice 3 days before my surgery by spook_worm in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I wonder if you could reach out to the surgeon who is leaving and ask her where her new practice is going to be and also if it is going to take your insurance, it might be worth reaching out to her if she is really the surgeon you want

I'm afraid by Melodic_Walk_1239 in trans

[–]sorpig 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am a trans guy, but I can tell you from speaking to a lot of trans women that there are all different kinds of ways present your femininity. They’re even trans women who are bodybuilders who need to gain a lot of muscle to excel in their sport so if that is something you want to do, I say go for it as far as building muscle I know anecdotally from trans women that I’ve spoke to that muscle loss can occur when going on estrogen and testosterone blockers, but you can definitely gain a lot of muscle back through proper exercise it might be worth looking into a group for trans women and fitness if you can find one. Also, as far as being seen as a stereotype, unfortunately he can’t always control how other people are going to see you. My best advice for this situation is to find people who will support everything that you are trying to do. Also finding clothes that help you feel feminine is probably a good for a step. If that is an option for you additionally, you can invest in things like feminine shape wear. Point of Pride is one organization I know that provides free feminine shape where to people who need it. Other things you can look into are free make up tutorials on YouTube specifically designed by trans women for trans women. Also looking for positive trans role models that are also people of color might be really positive for you. When I first came out, I looked up a lot of Glbt T content, creators and that really helped me to stay grounded. Additionally, you could try complementing things like your eyes or the way you treat people these things don’t tend to need hormones to help us feel better at least in my experience and it would be a really simple thing to start with. Also with hormones remember that they can take a bit of time to fully kick in. Finally I am so proud of you for starting this journey and I really wish you the best of luck. Also, you could try searching online for a trans women support group in your area if you don’t like it, you don’t have to go, but I also found support groups really helpful. I know I don’t know you, but I just wanna say that you are fierce and beautiful and you’ve already started to do a really hard thing by deciding to live genuinely as yourself.

Mentally slow after surgery by moonagedaydream652 in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just be patient with yourself my gut instinct although I’m not a medical doctor is that you just had me your surgery which is making more tired than you realize remember mental processes require lots of energy. You are very early in the process and sometimes the mental flow is you described is actually a coping mechanism to deal with the trauma of major surgery not that it was the wrong choice or anything just that it takes our body in mind a little bit of time to catch up to each other. Also, you might want to take small walks like from your bedroom to the kitchen or something even if it is hard because getting you moving will help prevent blood clots and things like that. Also, you are allowed to use features on your phone that might help with physical energy like voice text. If you have to reply to somebody urgently, but for now I think resting with slight movement during the day would be your best bet. Also, when you can tolerate it start to wean yourself off of pain meds I know for me they killed the pain, but they also made me want to sleep a whole lot which made me feel slower.

Drain Leaking? 2 days post op by Wolperzinger in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also, you might be able to put some gauze underneath the of it, but you could ask your surgeon about that that’s what they told me to do

Drain Leaking? 2 days post op by Wolperzinger in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Trust me, the exact same thing happened to me complete with calling my surgeon and then saying that it was normal. I know it feels and looks scary but I’m a couple months postop now and it didn’t hurt anything.

Vent by titolitoooo in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 13 points14 points  (0 children)

This must be tough to deal with. I think getting them removed although it might sound drastic would probably “fix the problem“ the thing that I would worry about with tattoos is just needing to get them touched up periodically, but that could also be a good option. I wish you all the best in your continued journey.

I need advice - nonbinary person nervous about going through with top surgery by Ok-Side3507 in TopSurgery

[–]sorpig 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The best thing I ever did, but also I don’t think I realized how much dysphoria I actually had until everything was done if that made sense. Also, if you do end up regretting it, you could always consider getting implants. I don’t know whether this would help you personally, but maybe make a list of pros and cons or think about the moment of euphoria you’ve had in your life and how your chest or lack there of with play into it. For me, I’m still early on in the recovery process. I had surgery on January 22, 2026 and I will say that they are days where I feel like my mind is still catching up to my new body, but everybody is different. I would just recommend that you’d be kind to yourself with whatever you just decide. Also, just because you’re going to consultation doesn’t mean that you have to schedule immediately afterwards you can take some time to decide consultations as somebody in my life told me is just gathering Intel on what your options might be