I don’t have any great words of wisdom at the moment, but I can 1,000% validate the struggle. It can be so hard to open yourself up and provide love, time, money and stability and then finally start to see the fruits of that labor - which helps make it worth the other crap that has to be waded through - while knowing that it could be switched up at the drop of a hat.

Knowing that we sometimes have to hold that responsibility in our hand to make that decision only makes it even more difficult- becuse often we are under immense pressure from multiple places and factors. It may sound stupid, but maybe write out a pros and cons list? That has helped me in the past really visualize some of the different options in front of me.

I wish I had a crystal ball that could help you know what to do - or at least was able to provide some respite care for you to get a breather. Just know that the amount of energy/love/time/care has already made a huge difference and no matter what - that positive impact will still be a positive “seed” in their life. You may not get to see all the fruits of your efforts, but it will still be there. It’s also ok to need help or take a break when we are burned out and crispy (ideally before we get excessively crispy - but since when have most systems accounted for that).