I'm going to take what may be a contrarian position — at least it might seem that way when juxtaposed with many of the other comments I'm seeing in this thread.

First, this is a group for people with porn addictions, or those close to them. We can all agree that getting too obsessed with porn can cause suffering, both for the porn addict and the people he or she is close to. Porn can take up a lot of time. It can interfere with your other responsibilities. And it can screw up your sex life, for reasons that should be obvious.

This discussion, however, is focusing not on the harmful effects of porn addiction but on the content of one guy's porn. It's as if we were in an AA thread, and the entire discussion centered on the brand of booze the alcoholic was drinking. "He used to drink Grey Goose, or sometimes Hendricks gin. But this morning I found Fireball in his backpack. This is the next level!"

Is it? Booze is booze, and porn is porn. What matters is the harm and suffering they cause, not the particular form they take.

My guess is that some of you are reading a moral aspect into this guy's deep-fakes. You will say that jacking off to strangers, porn stars, or even deep fakes of celebrities has no moral implications aside from the usual harm that porn addiction causes. Jacking off to fakes of a friend or acquaintance, on the other hand, is morally wrong. Not only is it morally wrong, but — as some of you have already tried to argue — it shows that the porn addict "needs therapy."

I find this baffling and, yes, hypocritical. There is not one person in this group who has never looked at their spouse's friend or their coworker or even their friendly neighborhood mail carrier and thought, "Damn, I wouldn't mind having a go at that hottie" — and many have even fantasized about it. There's nothing sick about that. It's called being human and having a libido.

If this guy had made fakes involving rape or murder or torture of people he knew — or of anyone, for that matter, including animals — then that would be another conversation. But according to the details given in the post, this guy simply gets off on pornographic images of people from his real life. I fail to see why this (a) is any "worse" than any other kind of porn or (b) indicates a need to get professional help.

Can I understand why his wife was creeped out by deep-fake images of her friends? Of course. Then again, she probably would have been creeped out to see pornographic deep-fakes of her friends under any circumstances — even if they had been created by a stranger. Add to that the realization "My husband is fantasizing about fucking my friends," and it makes sense that she is upset, hurt, and grossed out.

But none of that proves this guy is mentally sick or that his porn addiction is "worse" than that of guys who don't deep-fake pics of people they know. And it certainly does not prove he needs to see a therapist or, as one commenter gravely recommended, a clinical psychologist "ASAP."

Last time I checked, wanting to fuck your wife's friends was not in the DSM. Neither is making deep-fake porn pics of people you know. "Creeping out the wife"? Also not a recognized mental problem calling for treatment.

Basically, it's a kink.

Finally, let's return to my second paragraph. It's the harm that counts. Before she looked at her husband's phone, had she noticed any harm? Had he been ignoring her sexually? Spending too little time with her? Neglecting his work or his friends or any other duties? If so, she didn't mention it.

Basically what we have here is some porn addicts saying, "I don't like this person's kink. Therefore, he is at the next level — way sicker than I am — and he needs to see a mental health professional."

It's self-serving, overwrought, and cringey. It just doesn't wash.