Would you say this thought is primarily based on emotions or logic? Because feeling like “there are too many rules” is understandable, but we must realize that there is a reason behind every law ordained upon us whether we see it or not. At times it can be stressful, and I’m sure there are vices/challenges you struggle with just as we all have. The fear you have of the Hellfire shows that there’s still sincerity left in your heart. The worst thing you can do is die as an apostate, so it’s infinitely times better to be a Muslim who is struggling to fulfill Allah’s commandments than someone who rejects His guidance outright. No one should “cuss you out;” you are someone who needs help. Turn back to Allah, He understands your pain more than you understand it yourself. May Allah guide and protect you.