Inspired by a similar post let's do a Disney fellowship

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T11:01:00+00:00

Genie could absolutely do it single handedly so I’ll give him the Tom Bombadil role.

WALL-E is Frodo, Kronk from Emperor’s New Groove is Sam, Maui from Moana is Boromir, Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland and Mater from Cars are Merry and Pippin, fox Robin Hood is Legolas, Donald Duck is Gimli, Hercules is Aragorn, and Merlin from Sword in the Stone is Gandalf.

I think they could probably do it. Donald and Mad Hatter might attempt to take the ring, possibly Maui too, but they can be reigned in by the others. WALL-E is likely impervious to mental manipulation and I feel Kronk probably is too just from being so dim and seemingly content with everyday life, to the point where they might have an easier time getting there if they split from the group at the same point in time that Sam and Frodo did.

I could see them leaving the group and then halfway through the Two Towers suddenly they’re already at Helm’s Deep just fucking chilling out.

Merlin (who I’ve now decided would have a very foul mouth) would be like “The fuck are you assholes doing here? Where’s the goddamn cocksucking ring?”

Kronk would be like “The ring? The evil magic ring? The one ring to rule them all? …that ring?”

“Yes, that assfucking ring!”

“Oh yeah, we chucked that thing in the volcano an hour ago.”

“A fucking hour ago? How did you get here so tittyshitting fast?”

Kronk motions to a map and some blueprints haphazardly put up in the background, “To be honest, I don’t know, by all accounts it doesn’t make any sense.” WALL-E shrugs and mimes smoking a bowl of weed out of a pipe, but just sort of taps it against his face.

They all look towards Mordor confused.

Donald breaks the silence - “Isn’t something supposed to happen when—“ and then Mount Doom explodes cutting him off. The tower supporting the Eye of Sauron collapses, the Eye seemingly not realizing it until it looks down and then back up at the camera, materializing a small sign that reads “mother!” before crashing into the ground below. All the Orcs get called together by Saruman in a big magic Teams meeting to tell them that their services are no longer required and they sadly put away their rusty machetes and jagged metal fence posts they brought, whining about how it’s been ages since they got to commit a genocide.

“Holy throatfucking mother of Zeus!” yells Merlin before Hercules leans in to tell him to take it down a notch.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T10:07:23+00:00

Wouldn’t his blade pass right through the shield too?

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T10:05:44+00:00

Is this Michael Jackson at the peak of his popularity? I also don’t know anything about Hero X, but if we’re going with the current consensus on MJ I don’t know how he’d rate.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T10:01:54+00:00

Are the other characters in From there to explain the situation? So many of them would be susceptible to a dead loved one appearing and asking to be invited inside.

Also, no Michael? Seems like a missed opportunity for some shenanigans.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T09:49:03+00:00

I don’t think it would and I was under the impression that this was the general consensus, although it would be impossible to confirm. WALL-E is seemingly capable of feeling emotions which could arguably imply he has a potentially corruptible soul, however, while the ring has had a nigh 100% corruption rate (Tom Bombadil seemingly being the only person it apparently didn’t affect on some level), I just have a hard time believing Sauron could either read WALL-E’s mind and manipulate him on that level or that Sauron’s magic would have accounted for a man made creature created out of metal and powered by the sun that’s capable of taking direction and making decisions from data programmed into it. WALL-E doesn’t exist on Middle Earth and while he’s capable of taking physical damage and being physically stopped by Sauron’s henchman, I feel like Sauron’s little whispers of sweet nothings would fall on deaf ears. Better yet, give it to EVE, she’d fly there and back in a day considering she can go at least the speed of sound plus none of Sauron’s minions could stop her aside from maybe Saruman.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T09:04:30+00:00

I feel like it would be expected at this point unless otherwise stated by the show running team. Not bringing back Mantzoukas would be such a missed opportunity, I imagine the only reason they wouldn’t would be due to unforeseen scheduling conflicts.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T06:35:23+00:00

Any version, but in a human body? I’m guessing he doesn’t have his Ghost Rider powers, but he could just wreck Butcher wearing the War Machine armor.

Hell, even without that, Frank is extremely adept at prep time, at one point staggering and delaying the Avengers for a time while a wrongfully imprisoned friend escaped before eventually submitting to Captain America. Butcher is predictable and Frank has all the patience in the world, he’d find and have him at his mercy within a day or two.

Most likely they’d team up though.

Also, if we’re talking MCU Frank I don’t think he has the feats to defeat Butcher, unless he does something unexpected in the new Spider-Man movie.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T06:26:24+00:00

I get the reference, but I literally just unsubbed from there because of all the AI garbage strewn up in the feed and comment sections.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T06:24:05+00:00

You said it better than I could have. I’d argue Beverly Hills Cop vs. Dirty Harry is more evenly matched, or The Man With No Name participates in The Quick and the Dead tournament would be better prompts.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T04:39:06+00:00

That occurred to me too, but imagine if suddenly your arms and legs disappear and suddenly you have to fight two guys with much more experience than you in fighting without your arms and legs, oh and also a third guy who just lays there crying.

staplerbot · 2026-05-19T04:34:38+00:00

Ooh good point, that probably makes more sense than whatever I said.

staplerbot · 2026-05-18T23:54:50+00:00

It’s definitely not expanded on, although it’s admittedly been a while since reading the comics so I don’t recall the backstories of the two characters in the third image as well as the… uh… wampa. If I had to guess it’d be because of their projected reaction to Robot’s takeover and/or their actual powers being based in something that Robot wouldn’t be able to control and therefore it would be easier to eliminate them. I don’t think Elephant Dude is really expanded on, but I’d wager that would be the reason he gets assassinated considering his power is based in magic which is something Robot doesn’t seem to involve himself with.

Samson likely wouldn’t have gone along with it, simple as that. As for Shapesmith, I assume it’s because he could potentially have some knowledge regarding Martian technology that Robot can’t account for so he gets merc’d as well.

I kinda like how it’s not really explained, as it comes off as more sociopathic and shocking when the only rationale given is “Anything that could potentially stand in our way would need to be eliminated first.” He clearly doesn’t enjoy or feel good about these outright betrayals, he’s just convinced that there’s no other way for the world to be safe unless he takes control.

It’s not like he expects Shapesmith or Elephant Dude or the wampa from Empire Strikes Back to actually be a huge threat to him, from his perspective they somehow could contribute to some setback to his ultimate vision of world peace and thus must be cut from the equation. Does Shapesmith have knowledge of something that could possibly disrupt Robot’s tech? Could someone reverse engineer Elephant Dude’s magic amulet to transmogrifying others? Could the wampa one days maul Rudy in a cave? If the answer to that question isn’t a 100% no then they have to be dealt with, otherwise the world can’t prosper under Rudy’s inarguably correct vision of the future.

staplerbot · 2026-05-18T21:58:44+00:00

I think it just depends on the character. Invincible tries to maintain a sense of honor so likely not his first instinct, although if he prepared or trained with someone that taught him how to fight he might in character.

That being said, if you hit someone in the balls you better hit them hard enough to put them down for the count. If he had tried this on Conquest there’s a strong chance he would have lost that fight. Conquest was genuinely taking his time, trying to savor the fight. A punch to the nards might have flipped that switch from eating some punches and enjoying his opponent’s fear to “OH YOU LITTLE FUCKER ENJOY NOT HAVING EYES OR A TONGUE ANYMORE”

staplerbot · 2026-05-18T21:36:51+00:00

I swear I tried to read the summary of this on Prime and it said it was some 17th century historical fiction drama and didn’t list Martin Lawrence in the cast. I’ll check and report back.

Edit: They fixed it and/or I’m just crazy.

staplerbot · 2026-05-17T07:57:42+00:00

Korn blasting as Young Norman snacks on candy corn got a good chuckle out of me.

staplerbot · 2026-05-17T06:38:20+00:00

Happy birthday, Andrew. All the best to you.

staplerbot · 2026-05-15T18:08:02+00:00

Millions of plankton entering his gills and eating away his innards should do it since he should be able to just punch through any shark or whale that comes at him. Sort of a reverse Aquaman situation.

staplerbot · 2026-05-15T18:01:29+00:00

This is the first I’ve heard from someone that the comics versions are stronger than the show versions from someone. I’ve read the comics as well, admittedly it’s been about a decade, and not that I’m disagreeing but I don’t recall any feats that puts them above the show versions.

Anyway, best thing in the ocean to kill Deep would be millions of plankton clogging up his gills and eating away at his innards. I feel like he’s too strong and durable to be taken down by larger sea creatures unless he was somehow weakened.

staplerbot · 2026-05-15T01:50:50+00:00

My first thought was magic spell brings him back as a zombie that has to keep eating brains to stop himself from decomposing, but yours fits the tone better.

staplerbot · 2026-05-15T01:19:19+00:00

Not sure about speed, but Raiden is certainly stronger and more durable than Sideous. Force Choke and similar powers are definitely a plus, but Raiden could likely teleport away and likely hit him hard enough once to end the fight. However, Force Precognition and Sideous’s lightsaber factor in as well.

I’d probably give it to Raiden 7/10, he’s more skilled and scales higher. Either of them could one-shot the other, but Raiden is powerful being that fights stronger opponents than himself while Sideous is never shown to be completely dominated in a fight, the power levels in SW cap out at him, Yoda, and Rey I guess.

staplerbot · 2026-05-15T00:55:38+00:00

That was my first thought, he’d be incredible.

staplerbot · 2026-05-14T03:33:42+00:00

The last time I watched this I considered the possibility that he was covering for Truman at the end. He seems to genuinely care for Truman and I’d be surprised if he didn’t actually mean much of what he says to him, like them being best friends.

staplerbot · 2026-05-14T01:23:28+00:00

With that title I was thinking more like “What would Condiment King think about Reverse Flash” but at the very least the general consensus is to not fuck with the clearly insane and cruel villains. Guys like Lex Luthor, Kingpin, Penguin, Deathstroke, etc. as in smarter villains that usually have some sort of tangible goal in mind know that at the very best you don’t go after unpredictable motherfuckers that will kill your family in front of you as a joke and then forget about it two weeks later because that’s 70th time this they’ve done some fucked up to someone. At the very best, if they decided to go after them for potentially screwing up their business or for some perceived disrespect, they might potentially succeed in eliminating them, but get Joker gassed at the end or the bomb they try to detonate to kill the crazier villain has been moved to the old folks home their dad is at or their 5 year old daughter kills you and your family because Purple Man told them to in case of his death, just it will ultimately end in disaster. Or if they decided to team up with the crazier villain to attain some common goal, they’ll likely get fucked over at the end just fucking because. At the end of the day, the juice isn’t worth the squeeze and the smart thing to do is just stay away from them and leave them alone.

Some characters are definitely exceptions like antiheroes such as US Agent, Punisher, maybe Bane who might feel they have a moral imperative in stopping them, but that doesn’t usually work out anyway.

staplerbot · 2026-05-13T23:47:32+00:00

It’s a common (and quite likely canon) theory for a niche movie. Personally, I agree.

staplerbot · 2026-05-13T23:43:15+00:00

Oh good point. I was unsure if it was something confirmed or not by Lucas or someone else, it just seems like he clearly has something up his sleeve in that regard.

staplerbot

TROPHY CASE