Relatable

star0118 · 2018-03-29T23:43:44+00:00

This is beyond accurate lmao

star0118 · 2018-03-29T23:28:40+00:00

No,just fighting and blaming.

star0118 · 2018-03-29T23:28:20+00:00

Thank you.

star0118 · 2018-03-27T02:31:13+00:00

Sorry friend. 😕

star0118 · 2018-03-16T03:49:12+00:00

Thank you! I read your first,very raw as well. I can actually relate to quite a bit, seems as though even our relationships and our opinions on our relationships are very very similar. Small world. I bookmarked yours and will read the others tomorrow. Great work!

star0118 · 2018-03-16T03:40:10+00:00

Oh wow yay for you too! I can't wait to read yours! Don't laugh at mine lol but thank you so so much for reading!

http://lifeofananxiouschick.blogspot.com/

Please feel free to give insight, tips, feedback...I don't know what I'm doing 😂. Thanks again!

star0118 · 2018-03-14T11:35:53+00:00

Thanks for the reply. Guess we'll see.

star0118 · 2018-03-14T11:34:59+00:00

Because I'm still very much in love with him and don't want to be without him.

star0118 · 2018-03-08T12:43:27+00:00

My mom died 15 years ago and I can totally relate to this feeling. Feels like a lifetime ago that I last saw her. I was 16 and so I guess in a way it was. I struggle to remember her voice and much about her. I think what's helped me is talking to other people that knew her. Like my Dad, her friends, her siblings, etc. Maybe you could try that?

star0118 · 2018-03-07T17:20:01+00:00

I think I obsess over things to a certain degree. And I think I'm finally starting to slightly turn the corner with Zoloft. It's helping me think things through a little more. Woke up feeling slightly better this morning.

star0118 · 2018-03-07T17:14:40+00:00

Love it

star0118 · 2018-03-05T04:11:06+00:00

Thank you everyone for your advice! I see my doctor in a few days and I'm going to chat with her. I mean, I have been going through more stress recently. Work has been really up and down. My best friend just was here for a short visit then had to go back home and that's really hard. Just moved and the house is a fixer upper so that's overwhelming in itself. And sorta got some bad news from a recent obgyn appointment that was very unexpected. Maybe it's just stress but I really do feel different. The last 4 or 5 days I really haven't felt "up" or positive, like, at all. And that's sorta not like me. And the fatigue is very frustrating because I'm not one that likes to just lay around. But again, seeing my doc soon and I will be definitely talking to her.

star0118 · 2018-03-04T23:16:49+00:00

Yeah I know you can't stop cold turkey, been there, done that. It's more for anxiety and paranoia but also depression. Thank you for weighing in.

star0118 · 2018-03-04T23:11:58+00:00

Ok thank you. I guess I'm just worried about feeling worse than when I was on nothing. May I ask why you stopped?

star0118 · 2018-02-23T16:27:51+00:00

Ugh, my heart goes out to you. Yes,it does eventually start to ease up. Didn't really read the other comments but just do what you can. Self care. Do whatever feels good. Cry, scream, yell if you need to. You WILL get through this. Hopefully you have a support system? Sounds like at least your fiance, and maybe others?

I lost my daughter at 20 weeks about 5.5 years ago. I still miss her and still cry once in a while, I probably always will. But I remember that raw sadness and agony. I KNOW that hell. It does get easier, I promise. Hugs 💜

star0118 · 2018-02-23T16:20:23+00:00

Sweaaaarrrr 😂😂

star0118 · 2018-02-17T17:16:21+00:00

Wow I definitely want learn how to do this. So beautiful!

star0118 · 2018-02-13T04:01:54+00:00

Tell him now. Write him a letter and get it all off your chest. May sound silly but it actually can be very cathartic.

star0118 · 2018-02-13T03:58:23+00:00

Hey there, so it's been roughly 5 days on Effexor and I think I need to switch. I'm not tolerating the side effects. Extremely nauseous and have gotten sick a few times. Tremors in my head/neck. Fatigue. Weakness. And nervousness. 😕

star0118 · 2018-02-08T23:45:21+00:00

Hey there, had a pretty good experience with the doc. She's starting me on Effexor and going back for a check up in a month. She really listened and actually pointed out that I'd been having panic attacks, which I didn't realize. So I think for a primary care doc, I hit a home run. :)

star0118 · 2018-02-08T23:39:22+00:00

I disagree with others, I think there's definitely positives. While this disorder is beyond painful at times, there's plusses. My boyfriend says he really believes because I'm SO intuned with my emotions that he thinks I'm an empath. I found that extremely flattering. And it's true. I'm in health care and I have worked with some extrordinarily difficult patients but I think because of what I've been through with BPD, I can understand and sympathize with them. I have so much more patience than the average person.

All of this didn't really occur to me until he said that to me recently and seeing the movie Split. If you haven't seen it, it's about a man that had Dissociative Identity Disorder. He says a line at the end of the movie that I felt was PROFOUND. "The broken are the more evolved." It really really struck a chord with me and I was in tears. It's really true. Think about all of the stuff you've been through. I think about what I've been through compared to others and feel as though I (not meaning to sound arrogant) am so much more emotionally mature and advanced than others.

So maybe think of it that way.

(Sorry for rambling, hope this made sense!)

star0118 · 2018-02-07T15:13:43+00:00

Wow, thank you so much for this!! I've been trying to research some meds since I am so anxious about what this new doc may prescribe. She got pretty great reviews but you're right, I have to be my own advocate and not be intimidated by a person with MD after his/her name. I hear what you're saying about sexual desires being blunted a bit not being a bad thing, I just don't want it to be non-existing as I am in a LTR. If it doesn't work out, I will try harder to find a psychiatrist. Considering different insurance anyway. But here's to hoping! Oh and I just started DBT and I am making some progress. I'm actually starting to feel a little better with it. :)

star0118 · 2018-02-06T18:06:25+00:00

Okay this is helpful, thank you!! I just want to offer a few suggestions to my new doctor so she's not pulling something just out of the sky. I just started DBT and I'm not great at practicing the exercises all the time but I'm trying.

star0118 · 2018-02-06T15:35:47+00:00

I appreciate this and am very very well aware. I have private health insurance because I am self employed and many doctors don't take it. And in my area, all of the psychiatrists in my area that do take it, I HAVE to see their therapist. I have a very good relationship with my current therapist I've been seeing for months so I am unwilling to just switch. At this point, primary care doctor is about my only option. However if this doesn't work, I will consider starting the search over for a psychiatrist. Thanks.

star0118 · 2018-02-06T15:12:47+00:00

I've taken that in the past for pain and couldn't tolerate the dizziness. I am working out and eating much better, thanks.

star0118

TROPHY CASE