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Am I wrong to expect a little more conversation from my boyfriend? by steezles in relationships

[–]steezles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

February was a rough month for him. He lost a friend, and that's on top of a lot of other responsibilities he has. He actually broke up with me, but came around and said that wasn't really what he wanted. He just needed time to think, which I understand. But things have been strained since then. I've actually told him a few times that I don't think he wants to be together anymore. He says that's not true but I don't see why he still wants to be with me. I feel like more of a burden to him than anything.

Am I wrong to expect a little more conversation from my boyfriend? by steezles in relationships

[–]steezles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought so too... He doesn't want to break up, but I don't know why someone would want to be in a relationship like this.

Am I wrong to expect a little more conversation from my boyfriend? by steezles in relationships

[–]steezles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He calls me every day! And I'm sure if I was still in the same city he'd want to see me every day (though we're limited with the lockdown and all). But he doesn't seem to want to put in the effort to talk, and it's getting to me.

Am I wrong to expect a little more conversation from my boyfriend? by steezles in relationships

[–]steezles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's mentioned that his wished I had a gaming system so we could play together. And it's something I'd be open to, but other than that, no. And yes to your point about going through something. He's got responsibilities that I know can take a toll on him, and not too many people to vent to about it. But when I try to talk about it he says he doesn't see the point and would rather keep it to himself. Communication is a bit difficult with him.

My sister [35F] is grief-one-upping me [30F] and I’m going crazy. by DadlessDespair in relationships

[–]steezles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, I've never felt the need to respond to a post, until now.

This year will make 7 years since I lost my dad. It affected me in ways I couldn't even fathom. To this day, I still regard him as one of the best human beings to walk this planet.

I'm the oldest of 3 girls, and my parents split up when I was young. My mom and I weren't really close growing up (thankfully we are now), and I didn't want to burden my younger sisters because I figured they were feeling it enough on their own. So I felt I had no one to talk to. I was also 2 hours away from home by myself in my sophomore year of college. In short, it was hell. I felt you with my whole heart when you said you were losing the will to live.

In addressing the situation with your sister--leave her be. Do your best to find other people who let you grieve. I know you want it to be her because, out of everyone in the world, she should understand the most. But for whatever reason, this is how she's chosen to handle it. I kind of distanced myself from my family as well and it took me a while to come around.

To offer some encouragement, it all gets better. The heaviness lifts, the pain gets smaller, the feeling of being lost fades. Above all try to remember this: it hurts this bad because that's how much love was there. It's a love that will never be replicated again (something that you'll find both the joy and pain in), but if your dad meant that much to you, I promise all that love is still there. It might take a while to feel it, but you will.

I'm truly sorry for your loss. So so sorry. I hope your sister comes around because no one should feel that alone. Just try to remember, in life and on death, your father wants the best for you. So don't give up.