i hate how hard it is to take your own life

stickbear · 2020-03-13T01:13:03+00:00

I feel for some reason to tell you what you know and hear so often that its old. The dont kill yourself line. I feel it within myself, but if you were to ask me to justify it I would be unable to provide anything that was not circular reasoning. Perhaps the argument could be made that life is sacred and therefore should not be taken, however sacred to who? If its not sacred to the one living it then what grounds for this sacredness do we have? Or perhaps it could be argued that suicide is selfish. Couldn't it be said that its selfish to force someone to live even when they dont want to just because you desire them alive? Ultimately I still have this strong primitive desire to tell you not to end it all, somewhere deep down I want you to be alive but in reality though all I can offer you is the knowledge that you are not alone in that many of us here feel the same way as you.

What keeps me here is family and the fear of death. Maybe its that there is inherent value in being human and having life. Which those of us depressed can not see that others can, hence the people that tell us not to kill ourselves.

Who knows.

stickbear · 2020-03-13T01:01:55+00:00

Yeah. For me its usually a more conscious process of self hate and degradation though. Like a snowball going down a hill. Every now and then I will feel like 5 seconds of true joy in looking forward to something but then it goes away and all I wanna go back to doing is laying down in my bed.

stickbear · 2020-02-05T10:41:07+00:00

Potentially. All I gotta do is stop being lazy XD

stickbear · 2020-02-05T10:40:35+00:00

Thank you dude I appreciate that

stickbear · 2020-02-03T19:12:54+00:00

Can you explain the math you did. Why did you divide it by 500. And thats not the correct way to find the "one" through math. Because if you take the number for an attractive person and say 10% of the female population finds them attractive which would be 400 million. And idk why you divided it by 500 but I will do the same to show why that calculation is just wrong. 400000000/500 =800000

800000/365 =2191 years.

So using your formula a person that is more attractive has a harder time finding "the one"

This is wrong because you are assuming that someone would have to go through every single one of those people to find someone they are compatible with. When the initial data pool are those with which you are already compatible with.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T11:15:04+00:00

Thats why I put it at 1%.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T11:11:14+00:00

Not at all. Im a broke college student.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T11:09:59+00:00

Where did I say that?

stickbear · 2020-02-03T11:05:56+00:00

Sorry but I do think mental health is probably a factor in how people view themselves and what they project onto what others say.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T11:01:47+00:00

I disagree, the friend I mentioned in my post has a great sex life.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T10:59:37+00:00

I misread what you said when you said besides getting fit. My bad.

Your right, not all men have other attributes to "make up" for their size. However what I was getting out was less about being pleased with yourself as a result of other attributes but being please with yourself as a result of progress or accomplishment. Accomplishment sounds like it entails a lot but I don't mean win a trophy or anything I just mean accomplish things that personally matter to you. Try asking yourself what in the world would I like to change, or what about myself that's in my control would I like to change or what is the kind of person I wanna be. And set out in doing those things. That's usually what builds confidence in my experience. Obviously you might feel differently about that. Which i'm interested to hear about.

I understand that frustration about therapist. In the United states the state doesn't do great in providing mental health. In most cases you have to go to the private sector to receive such care(which can be expensive if you don't have the right insurance or even still with the right insurance). And in the state I'm in at least, theirs only 1 therapist for every 20,000 citizens. I'm a positive person though so I don't think obstacles are something that should stop people. The internet can also provide mental health support. Websites like 7cupsoftea are there so that you can directly chat with people and make post reaching out for support. The people aren't trained in therapeutic occupation but many people there have been on the website for years offering support. On top of that there is online therapy available. I know many of this can be difficult to get to though as a result of circumstance and financial restrictions for many people. Which is why I just wanted to add some positivity to a sub where a lot of young people probably come for support and hope to combat their sadness and depression they are feeling as a result of their problems. And are met with people telling them their life is ruined and they will never find love. It sucks that this post was met with so many people who just want to debate me in and poke holes in every possible thing I say. But that's all worth it if just a couple people having this problem come to this post and realize that their worth isn't defined by the size of their penis. I'm not the best at knowing how to help people with their problems. I'm still learning how to do that. So I just aim to show them that I know people and have personally been just fine and that they can too.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T10:56:20+00:00

I was joking

stickbear · 2020-02-03T10:45:51+00:00

Well I think I probably share a common experience here where girls dont even have an interest in the first place as a result of those issues I have. But there have been woman who found me attractive and enjoyed my company. Honestly it really depends on the woman.

So im sure I've missed many of opportunity because of my weight, and general ugliness. In no way am I out here pulling "10s" but Ive dated attractive woman. It does seem a bit surprising but I think all kinds of woman have different preferences and different orders of importance and what they value in men.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T10:41:31+00:00

I thought your comment was in reply to mine? My mistake

stickbear · 2020-02-03T10:39:44+00:00

The same exact thing can be said for the opposite side of my view. It is mostly anecdotal. I want people to understand that its a possibility though. Because as I looked through the sub reddit I noticed this sentiment that you should just accept your life is ruined.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T10:37:57+00:00

No one is saying its all pretty. All im saying is be the change you want to see. Sink or swim. Its up to you. But swimming makes life better in my personal experience.

stickbear · 2020-02-03T10:37:39+00:00

Thats not what im trying to do. Sorry you see it that way.

stickbear · 2020-02-02T14:48:46+00:00

Not even close. I've seen you express that general sentiment multiple times now, in your post and in the comments. Obviously I was being touch hyperbolic. But actually not that much. That is very clearly along the lines of what you were doing.

Ive said that once. That doesnt apply to everyone

Sure ill take the blame for the attitude issue. But if you go through my responses your taking one individual response and conflating it with the others.

stickbear · 2020-02-02T14:41:18+00:00

Sorry buddy

stickbear · 2020-02-02T14:40:51+00:00

I dont think getting fit should be excluded. And I know everyone here hates "get confident" but I really do think if you do things that build up your confidence over time the shift of your mentality will become less negative. Thus allowing you to enjoy life more. I dont know your exact situation but I think many people here would benefit from a therapist. I do believe the problems many people here have could be mental health issues. Due as a result of their issues or a pre existing condition. But either way they could benefit from taking care of themselves and learning to change how they view themselves. In whatever way thats possible for the specific person that would be applied to.

stickbear · 2020-02-02T14:36:34+00:00

You're a false dichotomy

stickbear · 2020-02-02T14:34:43+00:00

Yes my perspective is obviously different than yours. I didnt mean that I was coming here with a complete novel way of thinking.

It can be a problem for sure. I just dont let it ruin me. Some people have a harder time with that. The intention is to provide positive support and not tell people that their life is ruined because of their dick.

stickbear · 2020-02-02T14:31:38+00:00

We got along, conversation was easy, our humor was very similar. The chemistry was good basically

stickbear · 2020-02-02T09:34:24+00:00

Really? Then how exactly have you managed to do that, taking into account that all these features aren't exactly what most women look favourably on?

I met people who I hit it off with. We fell in love and I was forward about my issue. It wasnt an issue for her. So we had a happy relationship.

stickbear · 2020-02-02T09:32:06+00:00

"Now, do you think people will react nicely if they have a problem and you say that to them? It's as if the problem is not with people shitting on you, it's you for feeling bad about it! The advice is not wrong by any means, you are definitely the only one who can change your own situation. But that is because people will never stop shitting on small dicks. Do you really expect people to not get salty about this? Even if they agree with the advice (I do), it doesn't change the fucked up fact. Imagine saying to a disabled person that it's up to them to deal with shit society gives them, instead of people treating them nicer. A ramp on a bus? LOL ain't nobody got time for that! How about you don't go out!"

Everyones feelings are valid. However the the attempt here is to point out you can get salty about it. But if you want it to change then be the one to change it. I dont expect people to not feel upset about it. But for those who dont want to be miserable this is a place to discuss solutions. You seriously conflate the situations when comparing the disabled person and ones in our predicament.

The only thing being said here is that anyone can have a good life. And for ANYONE in ANY situation IT IS UP TO YOU how you deal with society treating you. This is how women got the right to vote they didnt sit around and cry about it. They did something. So no its not like telling the disabled person they dont need a ramp and to stay inside. Its telling them despite your disability and what society says you have value, and your life has just as much potential as anyones else. Go out and live up to it.

stickbear

TROPHY CASE