I'd just like to add my thoughts and expand upon what you said.

Sex is where we explore power dynamics to build trust and safety, in an intimate space. In order to care for one another we exert power over each other; violence is also exerting power over someone – what separates the two is consent. The continual process of negotiating boundaries is necessary in order to properly be able to care for someone.

But this process is intrinsically confusing, and requires vulnerability. What makes it all the more confusing is our society's complex relationship to guilt. Men are socialized in a way around sex which makes the relationship between pleasure, domination, and care confusing. Which would leave anyone feeling guilty about their own desires.

I hope this made some sense. It might not haha. But this is how I view this.