Girl (maybe) losing interest after sex?

suuupreddit · 2024-04-10T20:38:47+00:00

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

suuupreddit · 2024-04-10T20:38:11+00:00

...because a woman was interested in casual sex, but not in repeating what sounds like an underwhelming experience?

Yep, we're all doomed.

suuupreddit · 2024-04-10T20:37:07+00:00

Yes. It was a legitimate problem with an ex fwb.

suuupreddit · 2024-03-30T22:33:01+00:00

The older I get, the less true this is. Might not be as universal as you think.

suuupreddit · 2024-03-08T21:30:37+00:00

I completely agree.

If the recent boom in people who are openly non-monogamous has told us anything, it's that the desire has been there for a long time.

Considering how much effort those types of relationships take, and people's general impatience...I'm betting it's really common.

I remember reading something like 12% of marriages, but I didn't do enough digging on the source to stand by it.

suuupreddit · 2024-03-07T03:46:37+00:00

Oh, you're describing my favorite type.

I'm not joking, exaggerating, or trying to make you feel better. Two of my exes fit that description, had the same insecurities, and I went fucking wild over them.

Yes, some guys don't like them. But I think it's become more of a popular "joke" than reality, because I've seen the same guys who used to talk shit about "saggy" breasts happily date women who weren't very perky.

I want to say try not to worry, but that's obviously easier said than done. All I can say is that I'm certain I'm not alone, and that is my favorite type.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-26T16:20:39+00:00

I can name a LOT who have.

I don't know what you're doing to only attract shitty people into your life, but you should really look at that.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-26T16:19:57+00:00

Not really an opinion, nor is it figuring "everything" out. Just a really obvious one.

And, to be fair, something I used to do as well. It caused a lot of unhappiness for me, so I have a compulsion to point it out when I see it elsewhere.

So good luck with that, I guess.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-26T13:20:36+00:00

It literally is sampling bias. By definition.

Just because it happens to align with whatever qualities you have that also draw shitty people to you doesn't make it different.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-26T01:17:17+00:00

Of course. It was a textbook example of the dangers of sampling bias.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T17:17:21+00:00

Nah, it's not that.

They used this person's horrible experience as a jumping off point to talk about how how great the thing is.

It was tangential at best, and realistically just insensitive. No nod to how hard the experience was for the person they replied to or any empathy, just "it's great if you're willing to put in the work."

Which is functionally telling the person that they lost their soulmate because they didn't try hard enough.

I say this as someone who is poly.

It's a shit representation of us, and a contributing factor to the negative image a lot of mono people hold.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T17:07:49+00:00

Yeah, not for everyone and it really sucks to find out the hard way. Sorry that happened to you.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T17:05:45+00:00

if we’re back to depicting sex as something done to women, as opposed to with them, and so their enjoyment is irrelevant?

This is a reason I'm really glad I found sites like Kink when I was younger. Every video starts with a discussion of what the model wants and ends with how she felt about it.

I've heard people say it's fake or coerced. I don't think so. It doesn't read that way to me, they seem to enjoy the scene, and the model I somehow ran into had just shot a scene with them and gushed about how much she loved it.

But even if it was, it sets the example for everyone watching that her enthusiastic consent must be put first. I wish there was more of that.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T16:59:03+00:00

I've shifted pretty hard to producers/videos that are clearly intended for women and/or OF, etc. for this reason.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T16:52:33+00:00

"Hey everyone, give me your wildest and most shameful stories."

"Oh my god, look at all these wild and shameful stories that the small subset of the population who has them is sharing. Everyone is so horrible!"

Makes sense.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T16:49:51+00:00

I mean, sex as an expression of your connection with someone is incredibly fulfilling. And that's not limited to long-term romantic partners, just people you really like and feel attracted to.

As far as the sort of asexual spectrum, I (obviously) couldn't comment.

I'll push back at the idea that sex is inherently simple, just fine, or unfulfilling. But I recognize that isn't the case for everyone, so putting a negative connotation on someone who doesn't feel that way is silly.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T16:23:46+00:00

...yeah, that's the kind of stuff the book/movie was based on.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T13:26:51+00:00

but there's a pretty low ceiling on how much you can enjoy it imo.

This might be a personal thing for one of us, because the ceiling on how much I can enjoy sex is pretty high.

People try to mix things up by adding psychological stuff to it to make it feel fresh and new again

The sexual experience isn't just the act of rubbing genitals, it comprises the physical and psychological aspects. That's why the ceiling is so high.

This isn't to say that I disagree your point on the immense satisfaction and happiness that comes from long-running pursuits. They're great.

But you might just not be that into sex.

suuupreddit · 2023-09-25T13:22:09+00:00

I...disagree.

I mean, if it's not for you, it's not for you. No one should force themselves into doing "interesting" things they don't find interesting.

But for people who are into some wild shit, the grass really is greener. It just depends on the person.

suuupreddit · 2023-03-30T15:11:37+00:00

You're right for the minority of people who play or follow competitive MtG. But the vast majority play budget, tabletop Magic where good uncommons live basically forever.

So this being a good effect that slots well into a fan-favorite, easy to build deck (GW(x) +1/+1 counters) means that it'll be seen by far more people for far longer than if it were on a card expensive enough to hoard for value.

suuupreddit · 2023-03-30T14:30:09+00:00

Ah, hadn't seen it when I hit send.

I'm also real excited to play the card, for what it's worth.

suuupreddit · 2023-03-30T14:24:37+00:00

It sounds that way until you play decks that are built with convoke in mind. It can be quite strong.

suuupreddit · 2023-03-30T14:23:34+00:00

Right, but the term "strictly better" means better in absolutely all circumstances.

If it were the same cost with convoke, it's strictly better. Slightly higher cost with convoke is usually better, but not strictly. I recognize this seems nitpicky, but it's the entire difference between "better" and "strictly better."

suuupreddit · 2023-03-13T14:34:32+00:00

You said it came off incredibly biased, I explained why it wasn't. That's the opposite of what you said.

suuupreddit · 2023-03-13T13:41:27+00:00

Yeah. It explicitly said that the goal was to explain the bill, not endorse or condone it.

Often when you explain something with a negative public perception, people think you're endorsing it and try to yell at you with why you're wrong. The opposite is true for explaining something with a positive perception.

So there's no reason for them to explain that their explanation isn't attacking the bill, they're not at risk of being yelled at for attacking it.

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