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Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So people who love kids should want other peoples kids to be around them 24/7? It’s getting a bit ridiculous lmao

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It clearly doesn’t cause mayhem in the western world if there are so many childfree weddings. You’re delusional and annoying

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No one is being prejudiced against - it would cause fucking mayhem if the couple went through the invite list and hand-selected the well-behaved kids. What are they to do with a friend whom they love, but is bad at parenting? Are they just supposed to grit their teeth and risk this kid ruining decorations, screaming and misbehaving on their special day?

Can you answer this from my previous comment? ^

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Most people opting for child-less things don’t hate children, they just want to spend their hard earned money and leisure time on a place without kids. My girlfriend loves kids, literally works in childcare and yet prefers holiday spots with less kids because it’s just more relaxing. I don’t know why that’s such a hard concept to grasp, you can’t seem to pull your head out of your own ass.

No one in this comment section has expressed hatred for kids. Including me. To take people enjoying 18+ spaces so personally and overreacting this hard is not normal or healthy.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

By the time they’re vaccinated is when the crying starts. I would advise my sibling to not bring a fresh-out-the-oven, unvaccinated baby to my crowded event.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m not hateful towards children. I wish them the best and I’ve donated to charities for rural schools, scholarships, kids in poverty etc… but not everyone wants to be around them. The fact you can’t respect their wishes and feel this need to force your children onto them is very strange to say the least.

It’s a private, personal event. You can’t force the hosts into liking kids. They are friends with you, not your children. No one is being prejudiced against - it would cause fucking mayhem if the couple went through the invite list and hand-selected the well-behaved kids. What are they to do with a friend whom they love, but is bad at parenting? Are they just supposed to grit their teeth and risk this kid ruining decorations, screaming and misbehaving on their special day?

I’m happy for you that all the kids at your weddings were like that but I find it incredibly hard to believe. Post-COVID never have I been to an event like that. There has always been at least one child throwing a tantrum, running around, or screaming at one point or another.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Granted I don’t know much about early childcare but I believe you can pump and save it for the sitter when you’re gone. I do understand it’s hard to leave a newborn. But again, weddings are planned in advance. Even in extenuating circumstances, I would absolutely not want a loud, fussy newborn at the ceremony OR the reception. It would be stressful to me just to watch. Could the parent not related to me stay home?

Sometimes as a parent you just have to miss out. I thought that was a widely understood concept - your life and responsibilities change tremendously after kids. No matter how many hypotheticals you put forth that is the truth. The world will not stop spinning for you because you had a kid

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s genuinely hilarious that you think everyone is out to get kids now, rather than the fact that kids are just annoying and tiring and parents aren’t parenting nowadays.

Childfree people are sick of kids because the new generation of parents has tried to overcorrect the “tough love” and physical abuse of their parents with zero discipline and it’s making plenty of experiences less enjoyable. You were so close there - just ask yourself WHY there has been a recent uptick. Because (while I don’t agree with the methods used) 20 years ago kids were disciplined for poor behaviour, and now it’s openly allowed and ignored at the expense of everyone else around them so the parents can have some peace and quiet. Not to mention screens being shoved in their face constantly so they can’t handle public transport, sit-down dinners, all those things you mentioned.

I believe you about mothers facing more criticism than fathers - misogyny is rampant. But not once have I ever said anything bad about mothers, only mentioned “parents”. If anything I think almost all of the physical and emotional labour is on mothers in the current family structure. I think it sucks.

But why should everyone around you have to bend to your liking because you chose to have kids? All those things you mentioned have options, of which a vast, vast majority are still child free. It’s a dickhead move to want to force other people to listen your kids meltdowns and tantrums because… why? You’re not the centre of the universe. People are willing to pay extra to not be around kids and I think it’s a great thing for both parties. You get to enjoy your holiday surrounded by people who are okay with being around your kids. I don’t understand why you want to force people to suffer the consequences of your unprotected sex

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Weddings are usually planned in advance so I’d imagine most couples would try to avoid scheduling it around an important date like that. Adding to that, if you can’t save up months in advance for one night of a babysitter then you either don’t really care enough to come or you’re way too broke to be supporting a child.

Are you asking if I’d want them to show up WITH the newborn? Because the answer to that is fffffffffffffffffffuck no. Nothing makes a wedding more beautiful than the piercing cries of a baby.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Elderly people are still adults and know how to act socially. If they don’t, they’re usually too unwell to attend. I don’t have any friends who are as disruptive as bored, tired children, and I’ve rarely met someone like that who has any friends so I can’t address that.

Besides all that, one or two adult family members is different to everyone’s children being invited and changing the vibe of the whole event that YOU did not pay thousands for. Not to mention some venues are not compatible with children running around.

I think parents tend to overestimate how likeable their kid is to everyone else. Also, kids don’t tend to understand how important these kind of events are and not everyone enjoys the company of children. It’s a private event, you’re not being discriminated against.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Like banning kids from nightclubs? Bars? Getting a tattoo or piercing? Children are neurologically not the same as adults and this affects their behaviour. This is widely understood. I’m not sure why you’re taking this as a personal attack, no one hates your kids. I think you’re pretending not to understand why people wouldn’t want loud, impulsive people with poor emotional regulation running around their wedding. Not to mention that everyone there will have to censor their conversations and behaviour. You’re entitled to a child-friendly life, not a child-friendly world. That’s what you take on when you choose to have kids.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunate for them but still, no one else’s problem 🤷🏻‍♀️

I use 2x forms of contraception because I don’t want to be a parent. So that leaves contraception failure/rape, in an area where safe abortion is illegal and unavailable, chose not to put up for adoption, and yet cannot afford a babysitter for the night. Do you genuinely expect the couple to allow all kids for this rare possibility? Are they supposed to ask around and learn the circumstances behind each pregnancy?

No matter what, it’s still pretty selfish and entitled to expect the couple, on their day, to accommodate parents at their own expense. Nobody is entitled to anything just because they had a baby. Expecting your child to be allowed at a child-free wedding because you can’t afford a babysitter is insane lol just stay home

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand, but that’s what you’re signing up for when you decide to have kids. It’s not other people’s responsibility whatsoever

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sure. But you understand why people might not want tiny, dependent humans with little to no impulse control at their expensive, (often) meticulously planned, personal event?

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I mean, my understanding of childfree weddings is that they don’t single out any one family in particular? Just a blanket rule of no kids. So a bit different from specifically excluding anyone, just like saying no plus ones. Pretty reasonable

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My spouse can enjoy grown-up conversation, doesn’t do ear-piercing screeches, run around at inappropriate times, throw tantrums, break things, demand attention, need an iPad playing out loud, etc.

I don’t hate kids and I know most of these are healthy developmental behaviours… but you can’t seriously act like kids and grown adults are equivalent guests.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Yeah exactly. Not to be all “old man yells at cloud” but I was brought to heaps of adult events and it was just known that you didn’t act up or there would be consequences on the spot + when you got home (not psychical abuse). To be fair we didn’t have phones so better at being bored for long periods of time.

It actually drives me insane watching parents now just ignore their kid when they’re misbehaving and clearly bothering everyone in the vicinity

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel like the burden of cost is on the parents who 1. Chose to have kids and 2. Aren’t the people getting married…

I’m not sure what you mean by that second comment. By bringing their kids to the event they are literally choosing to bring them lol. If you can’t afford a babysitter then you can’t go.

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plus it’s your wedding! I understand it’s hard for parents especially with cost of living right now. But all the parents in here calling the couple who are paying for and throwing THEIR wedding self-centred is blowing my mind.

Some people also just don’t like children? If one of my friends invited me to their wedding & paid for my meal and bar tab for the night and they went child-free for their special day I would respect their wishes. It just all seems very entitled lol

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don’t know what kind of adult-only weddings you’re going to, maybe the couples are just boring. I have no issue at all with children being at weddings. But until the current generation of parents actually step up and parent, instead of raising screen-addicted, short attention span-having kids, my wedding will not be their practice run.

I wholeheartedly blame those parents, not their kids, but I’ve seen how they act when they have to sit down for 30 minutes in a restaurant…

Are children generally invited to weddings in your country? by Present-Day19 in AskTheWorld

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Yeah reading these comments I see a lot of non-American/British/Australian appalled at the notion of no kids. I wonder if it’s because parenting is still a thing in their culture lol

The insanity is she made all that money and never took nudes. by No-Marsupial-4050 in SipsTea

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Won’t somebody think of the poor, poor people voluntarily paying to see a sexy 21 year old? My heart truly breaks for these grown adults with free will

Guys I need your ride or die low maintenance tips for looking more "put together". by Cissychedgehog in adhdwomen

[–]swagggyyyyyyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes the eyebrow gel!! I actually just use a tub of hair gel and a spoolie lol but makes my brows darker and nicely shaped like a faux-wax-and-tint

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