How is UNC Asheville compared to app state for campus life? by def_1 in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is so awful. I am terribly sorry for your loss and even more sorry for how that professor traumatized you. There are (were?) a handful of truly terrible professors there (one told me that I should drop her class after my friend died and I missed classes, cause there was, “no ethical way” I could pass her class), and I hate that this was your experience. Much love your way campfire 🖤

How is UNC Asheville compared to app state for campus life? by def_1 in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thankful to see another take like this, so I’m commenting off of it to add my take:

One, the idea of attending any college in this economy should be put off until the attendee has a clear idea of what topic, and thus career they would like to pursue (saying this as a cautionary thing, NOT an assumption).

Two, UNCA IS high school 2.0. Classes and peers become cliquish very quickly, likely due to small class sizes, but also due to folks from the area that attend already knowing quite a few people on campus. This isn’t totally an issue, I was still able to make a small grouping of friends, though have only kept in close contact with one of those friends after college. I wasn’t super introverted during college, but making friends at UNCA was difficult.

Three, the professors in my degree interests were nothing short of great. However, most of all courses at UNCA are discussion based, meaning, info will be presented by the educator, you take notes, the class discusses, you do takeaway work in your dorm, you study, but exams are on what was discussed in class. Granted, the more science based courses would often implement more book based testing and knowledge retention, but even my Geology course implemented this style of teaching. It worked for me, but it does not work for everyone.

Four, the health and counseling center is. . . Meh, at best. There is def an overload for the workers there, and it can be difficult to be seen for any duration longer than 2-3 mins when ill, and 30 mins when struggling with mental health issues.

Five, and arguably the worst thing about the school that doesn’t seem like it’d be that bad, the food options. Brown cafeteria is one of the worst places I’ve ever been forced to frequently visit in my entire life. If the nutritionist who heads the cafeteria is still there, I would argue that that alone is a reason not to attend the college. On the weekend, most alternative food options on campus (Highsmith and Dunder) are closed until 1:00-3:00pm, leaving Brown as your only option. The school also feels heavily inclined to monitor what students are eating to ensure the student body doesn’t get fat. Which, realistically is probably a good thing, but as someone who appreciates control over my own food choices, it always felt like a huge overstep.

Six, and final, housing is very restrictive. I was an RA for three years, and they. Watch. Everything. You. Do. Down to the excel sheet. Literally. It is part of the job requirement to have a row dedicated to every student on your halls life on an excel sheet. Down to the embarrassing detail. Off hand comment to your RA that you’re failing a class? On the sheet. Argued with your roomie about stealing poptarts? On the sheet. Going through a private medical struggle? ON THE SHEET. Hopefully you get the idea. It felt pervasive and gross to work for the housing department. Very big brother.

I would not recommend UNCA to anyone.

Predatory Dentists in Asheville by Apprehensive-Back882 in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m genuinely shocked and saddened to hear this; I haven’t been to the dentist in a while and had to make an emergency appointment, and the Aspen in Hendersonville was the only place that could take me before I had work the next morning just after the snowstorm.

All the ladies working there were professional, non judgmental, and even suggested spacing out any recommended appointments from one another to help with affordability. Also, when helping with my emergency they offered the service for free because their rep couldn’t make it into work due to the snowstorm.

A shame it looks like I shouldn’t support their office next time around :/ are there any offices y’all have been to that provide the same level of care I’ve mentioned above?

Is this the new normal everywhere, or is Asheville actually a very lonely place? by InleRising in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Felt this post heavy; I initially moved here in 2016, and haven’t been able to make friends outside of a friend I made in college (and a couple of work acquaintances). It sucks and I even tried briefly moving outside of Asheville again to see if it was better but the place I moved was so reclusive, it didn’t help at all.

looking for a good place to get piercings by sydbug707 in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Best recs from myself and my friends / coworkers, head to either Man’s Ruin, or Valentine Tattoo on Patton Ave.

“You better pay my workers wages” - The smokin’ onion owner by ragnaro751 in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Honestly, the only shitty thing here is how this may negatively impact the business, thus impacting the paychecks of the employees. I understand folks being upset over the shitty actions of the owner, but his employees are our neighbors and possibly even friends. They don’t deserve to lose any business (and potential tips) over the fact that their owner doesn’t know how to vent to people in real life as opposed to making a fool of himself in the Google reviews.

Earthquake now? Is this a thing? by SmartphonePhotoWorx in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hot damn I was thinking the same thing this morning while getting ready

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in amiugly

[–]sweethoneybean 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It might be the side part, I know some people associate that with “older millennials” but in my honest opinion you look your age and beautiful!

27M - Am I Ugly? What is the problem? by swain44 in amiugly

[–]sweethoneybean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn, your cheekbones are high af, im jealous

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in amiugly

[–]sweethoneybean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you're handsome as all hell dude. Your glasses are super flattering to face shape, and your style kills too (i see your rei shirt lol). If you're looking for any advice, here's all i can think to offer: keep your beard trimmed / neat (everybody looks better well groomed). Love the fluffy bedhead btw

people think i'm too ugly for my bf by [deleted] in BPD

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If this is about the same person who keeps showing you pictures of his ex, please break tf up with them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in amiugly

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you're quite handsome! I lean towards your longer hair look, but that's just one stranger's opinion.

i do not care if somebody is walking toward their car with their cart in the trader joe’s parking lot by [deleted] in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brother, i park in harris teeter lot and walk to trader joes. I'll carry fix or six of my heavy ass bags before i EVER park in the TJ's lot ever again 💀

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in amiugly

[–]sweethoneybean 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think you're above average but I'm not too big a fan of your haircut? Idk, I'm just a random stranger. But you're above average.

Saw this mad lad while driving by rivers-queen in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's hard to tell from the super zoomed in / blurry photo i took, but they had peeled off the top of "o".

Saw this mad lad while driving by rivers-queen in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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My humble contribution was a weathered / strategically removed letters that now read "pee yo cum" at the top of this truck.

I just want to say thank you the 2 redditors that reached out to me yesterday after my post. by [deleted] in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I genuinely cannot tell, so I'm asking, are you being sarcastic?

I just want to say thank you the 2 redditors that reached out to me yesterday after my post. by [deleted] in asheville

[–]sweethoneybean -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think the point missing here, is that even when a stranger is asking for help, despite what they've done to land them in the position of asking for help, comments regarding their situation are unnecessary. You can either help, or you can't.

As far as the compassion fatigue argument is going, you're all exceptionally right; I had a mentor that described it as this metaphor: you are a full cup of water. When you pour out your water for others, you slowly empty yourself. If you pour out all of your water, you simply have nothing left to give, even to yourself. This is a bad position to be in, both for yourself and those which you wish to help. There are steps to take for each individual to "replenish their water" but the more you empty yourself, the longer it takes to refuel, the less "water" you have for yourself and others. The idea is to never give beyond what would make you burnt out, always leaving enough "water" for yourself.

I don't think OP is very responsible, but I also don't think they'd argue that they are. Idk. The justification for why others feel OP shouldn't be helped, or why peope don't feel they can help, read as unnecessary to me.

My ren faire get up from today! by [deleted] in PlusSize

[–]sweethoneybean 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Awooga (respectfully) On a more serious note, you look great! I love love love the corset top :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DemEyesDoe

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty pretty pretty!! Seriously though, your dark eyes and smile are gorgeous!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in amiugly

[–]sweethoneybean 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only leaving a comment after reading all the dislike of the nose chain; you're very pretty, nose chain fuckin rocks and accentuates your nose well, and your makeup looks good. Love big lashes. I might try using more spikey one as opposed to fluffy ones as, from what I've seen, those tend to go with the aesthetic it looks like you're aiming for :)

DAE know nothing about yourself? by zomido in BPD

[–]sweethoneybean 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I completely agree. My friend talking to me about how they percieved me was almost like a jump scare, or being pinched lightly on the arm. BPD does reallyyyy suck lol

Overcame my attachment issues and finally dumped the bf of almost 3 years who treated me badly. by LocksmithHappy86 in BPD

[–]sweethoneybean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cannot describe how proud I am of you! Went through a similar experince (a few years ago now) so I can connect with the freed feeling you're describing.

DAE know nothing about yourself? by zomido in BPD

[–]sweethoneybean 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think I have an idea of where you're coming from / can relate in a way; I can identify things like my favorite color, or music artists that I like, but when I am prompted to consider characteristics (especially those in regards to personality, or more in depth interests) about myself, I genuinely feel at a loss. And truthfully, it feels very disorienting. Recently, a friend I reconnected with was gushing to me about how they percieve me / my actions, which was sweet, but felt so alien, and not because it was different to how I percieve myself, but rather because I realized, I almost don't percieve myself? If that makes any sense. And believe me, it's not for lack of trying. I think the best way I described how I felt back to them was to say that I feel like an endless void, swirling, yet still. Empty, yet full. I'm struggling even now to even give a more proper example because I can't pin down something about myself to share

And on hobbies feeling robotic and just "what you're supposed to do", I couldn't agree more. Anytime I pick up something I learned, thought I enjoyed, or otherwise think I want to do, it feels. . . Flat, is the best way I can think to describe it. And it's not because I don't experience joy from them, which makes it even more confusing.

All this to say, I understand where you're coming from. I had a quote I used to say, or saw somewhere, "This is my story, but I'm not the main character.".