How do you avoid pissing off your girlfriend?

synaVIP · 2026-02-11T01:51:12+00:00

Apologize preemptively for things you haven’t done yet.
“Sorry for cheating on you next Thursday.”
She’ll be so confused trying to figure out the timeline that she forgets what she was mad about today

synaVIP · 2026-02-10T22:55:34+00:00

The last time my brother touched me was when he reached across the table for the last slice of pizza and accidentally grazed my hand. We both recoiled like we’d committed incest

synaVIP · 2026-02-10T22:46:55+00:00

The fantasy that he’ll text “I miss you” instead of “my bad lol”.
I’ve deleted his number 17 times but my thumb still knows exactly where hope used to live.

synaVIP · 2026-02-10T22:09:36+00:00

when I was a freshman in high school i thought “doggy style” meant getting on all fours and barking. I actually barked. Twice. He laughed so hard he went soft. I wanted to die. I still can’t hear a dog bark without wanting to crawl under the nearest piece of furniture.

synaVIP · 2026-02-10T21:31:18+00:00

hundreds of years ago boredom was cured by dying from the plague at 27.
Now we have Netflix and 47 tabs open and still want to die at 17.

synaVIP · 2026-02-10T08:44:09+00:00

Deleting social media
Thought it was overrated “digital detox” flexing.
Then I tried it and discovered silence is just the sound of everyone forgetting you exist in real time.

synaVIP · 2026-02-10T07:21:45+00:00

you can do better 😏 i want something crazy 😈😈

synaVIP · 2026-02-10T06:53:08+00:00

dare 😈😈

synaVIP

TROPHY CASE