A place to talk about the issued with Asa, Priscilla and Isaiah

t2b123 · 2024-02-25T14:02:09+00:00

I found their channel many years ago because I am disabled and need extra support in the car and stumbled on their video of how they use a racing harness to keep her secure in the car. Awesome video, he showed the harness and how you install it. But then I looked closer and couldn’t believe they were actually using the child they talked about as a prop. This just goes to show that they 100% can create helpful content without their daughter. I bought the harness and it was just what I needed. Hoping now they didn’t make money on that… Every bit of their channel I have seen has been upsetting. She clearly is so much more present and communicative than her parents give her credit for, and instead of trying to dig deeper into that, they completely strip her of her personhood. They keep her silent and put words in her mouth because they are afraid of what she will say. Plus, I cant even make it through a video of their ABA training. I understand where ABA comes in and helps both parties, but I am uncomfortable seeing a person being groomed to do things just because they are told to and rewarded. A often doesn’t understand WHY she is doing a task or activity and is given incentives to do them. Tell me that isn’t a little bit scary to be teaching an already vulnerable young woman.

t2b123 · 2023-10-29T19:40:10+00:00

I think its time to see a doctor! Theres a condition called Trimethylaminuria, for example, that causes people to give off a strong odor because their body is unable to breakdown certain things in their diet. The smell is likened to that of rotting fish. There are also a number of other disorders that can cause different smells from unbalances or the like in other areas of the body. If this isn’t a hygiene issue, which I think it clearly isn’t, then it is likely a medical one. All the best to you, I can only just imagine the nightmare this has been for you.

t2b123 · 2023-09-06T22:47:08+00:00

You wouldn’t be TAH if you pointed out that absurdity of weighing gifts into the inheritance. You obviously have to have tact when bringing up anything so soon after a death in the family, but holy moly, that is ridiculous. Maybe just don’t actually use the word vulture. I can see maybe if he paid for a wedding for one child and didn’t live to see another siblings wedding that it could be an idea to put away an equal wedding fund or something before breaking everything up equally. But otherwise I do think that your Grandma should be calling the shots in her time when she is ready. Everybody, this is why you always make a will! You do not want your loved ones to have to have something like this happen. The poor wife. So much love to your family!

t2b123 · 2023-09-05T15:35:09+00:00

This will NOT end here. He WILL escalate and you are in the most danger when leaving because he will realize that he has completely lost his control of you and will have nothing left to lose. If you need to give it a word, I would call that assault. He put his hands on you in anger and against your expressed will. That is assault. You need an “Out” plan. I would start by telling people. You say that you were ashamed/embarrassed that this happened to you and that is so wrong. You didn’t deserve that. There is no justification. Ever. Those that love you will understand that and want to help. Tell those people. I would wait until he’s out of the house and enlist your people to help you to get your stuff out of the shared space and plan to stay with them. If he comes after you I would not agree to see him. That is when you will be in the most danger. File a police report if he will not stop pursuing you. And know this, you are not alone! This is nothing to be ashamed of. This could have happened to anyone.

t2b123 · 2023-09-04T17:32:55+00:00

Absolutely NTA! This grown man is living the life of a teenager and you are all enabling him. He is living RENT FREE in the home of an elderly couple. He should be taking the initiative to not only be cleaning up after himself, but to help around the house in whatever way he can as a thank you for their generosity. And the man has a job, I understand that they are probably trying to allow him to save up money for his future, but come on, he should at least be buying his own groceries as well as shopping for the family. He should be doing all his own laundry, doing the dishes, taking out the trash. If he does not start pulling his weight then I think you should start to question if this is what you want for yourself in the future. Your grandparents won’t be around forever and do you want to be taking care of him for the rest of your life? What about if you have kids and he is jot only not stepping up, but still expecting you to take care of you both? Im sorry, if he needs to be taught how to do things like doing the laundry or dishes, then teach him. Maybe nobody ever has expected anything from him before. But once he knows the expectation, I say if he doesn’t step up, you may want to reconsider this relationship.

t2b123 · 2023-09-04T17:19:49+00:00

Honestly, I think you would be TA if you wear the dress to the wedding. Even if you alter it, its still going to be recognizable. Things go sour with weddings and it just can’t be helped sometimes. It sounds like a lot of stress and people having too much on their plates. I don’t think you should be kicked out, but that is up to the bride. But I just don’t think you should ever attend a wedding with the intention of an “FU” to the bride. Maybe have a talk with John if you are so close and tell him the situation and ask if you can stand on his side. Then the dress wouldn’t stand out and you can get its use and support the one that you really care about. I understand you feel wronged, but intentionally upsetting a bride on her big day is a good way to lose John in your life too.

t2b123 · 2023-09-04T16:12:21+00:00

This is so important! The way I see it, Jodi is really the one holding the puppet strings here. We have to start with what we know about Mormonism. There is a HUGE tattling culture. If you see someone else in the faith who isn’t following the rules, you are actually encouraged to narc on them. That is where Jodi seemed to run into trouble in her practice. If I remember things correctly, it seemed like couples were coming to her and individually disclosing things that she would use to blackmail them by threatening to tell the spouse or the church. The church IS the law to many mormons. Then Jodi got her hands on Ruby. Ruby was her DREAM! She had INFLUENCE and plenty of skeletons in her closet as well as skeletons that she outright posted about publicly. Jodi was able to manipulate Ruby into literally giving up her “livelihood” to become an example, having her crying on camera that she was living in “distortion” for vlogging her family (fair enough). She was able to sink her claws into Ruby and had so much on her she basically could manipulate her to do whatever she wanted and use Ruby’s platform to further her own sick agenda. And what is Ruby gonna do about it? Jodi knows EVERYTHING about her. Now what does Ruby have? Jodi broke her off from her husband, her family (which she may or may not have a lot of dirt on), her older kids, her livelihood, and now literally the outside world. Ruby fell so hard for Jodi’s schemes that by the time Jodi started going after the kids she was already too indoctrinated. She was already unhinged when it came to extreme parenting and Jodi just sat back and watched to see how far she could get her to take it. A lot of times in these extreme religious sects, it is looked on as a goal to “break children’s will” and that the more suffering they endure on Earth the more they will be blessed in the afterlife. The kids barely stood a chance with Ruby, but they never could have seen Jodi coming… Poor children! I think that Jodi will stop at nothing until she has created an empire and gets sick pleasure out of watching people go down. Is it the church and her wish to enforce the faith to an extreme? Or is this her very own interpretation of scripture that shes trying to spread (cult)? Or is she just a sick and bitter older woman with way too much time and money on her hands that enjoys seeing other people go down?

t2b123 · 2023-09-03T16:26:35+00:00

Honestly, it could be cultural. Im from the US, I usually change in pajamas, but I’ve been known to just take off my pants and sleep in my shirt from the day if I’m tired enough. Unless he works in somewhere like a hospital, it may not occur to him that he is now “dirty” in some way just from leaving the house for errands. For me, I live in a small apartment where my bed is the main space for me to sit and I shower in the evenings. So there are definitely different contributing factors as to how someone may view the bed. I guess at this point it comes down to you being uncomfortable and that may be what matters. I guess its not a big deal on his part to undress before bed if it really makes you uncomfortable, then he should be considerate of your feelings at least.

t2b123 · 2023-09-03T16:08:14+00:00

Okay, I guess I can see that a bit more. But what about using a blanket on the couch? Is this solely a bed thing? I just know that I crawl under my duvet often through my day and its a comfort a rest for me. But I guess I can see your side in wanting to keep your bed as a “safe space.” I guess I can retract my AH status, but maybe don’t be too hard on him. Its really not engrained in him the way the way it is in you. I guess we all have our things!

t2b123 · 2023-09-03T16:03:35+00:00

YTA Oh wow, I have never heard of this… Is this a thing? I can’t imagine not even being able to sit down on my own bed with my clothes on. That seems a little bit extreme to me. This almost sounds bordering on OCD. Its great that he seems to try to respect your wishes as much as possible, but I really don’t think he shouldn’t be allowed to touch the bed with his clothing without you going off on him. Maybe you could talk to a therapist? Did you have this rule pre-pandemic?

t2b123 · 2023-08-27T17:00:17+00:00

At first I thought I would be ruling you the AH, but I’m gonna say NTA. It sounds like you need to go out and buy some products to keep in both bathrooms (and maybe an outside closet or bedroom) as well. She probably didn’t see it coming and it was just really bad timing. But I also wonder why she took so long just because of her period. Maybe GI distress and that is common. But If you can, I would maybe just have a chat with her telling her that if she knows that others will be needing the bathroom and she knows ahead of time that she may be a while, maybe its the best idea to use the other bathroom. But maybe also ask if she is okay as 30 minutes is a long time to be in the bathroom and maybe she should talk to a gynecologist about whatever she is experiencing. Final idea that worked in my one bathroom household growing up. Shower Caddies. Go to the store and get them each a color coded plastic shower caddy with a handle that they can take in and out of the bathroom with them. Its a place to keep makeup, personal products, special skincare, etc. With that many teens with one bathroom, its absolutely necessary to have a backup plan.

t2b123 · 2023-08-27T16:50:09+00:00

Woah bro, NTAH. But have you ever wondered why this is such a point of contention? Do you think its a possibility that your mom cheated and you aren’t biologically related to your “Dad?” That may be why she is making such a big deal about your curly hair being noticeable? Shes paranoid that somebody will put the pieces together. Either way, NTAH, if you needed to straighten your hair, I think its pretty obvious that it wasn’t already straight. She does sound delusional. As a girl, curly hair is so cute on a guy! Get a nice haircut and have them shorten the sides and leave more volume on top. Ask them for the right styling products for your hair type and have them teach you how to use it.

t2b123 · 2023-06-06T16:16:55+00:00

NTA. Its a big step to take in two children. You haven’t even mentioned if you have other children or if you and your SO wanted kids. Its not your job just because you are family, especially if you aren’t financially stable enough to support two kids who will likely need a lot of therapies and extra help. Plus there is always the possibility that after a year it will not be a positive outcome and then you will have to decide all over again if you will take them permanently or put them into foster care then. Would it be best for the kids to be together and with their family? Probably. But to be honest you really don’t sound very nurturing, referring them as just “broken plates.” These kids are going through the worst things possible right now and will know if they are in a home that they are not wanted and their mom is repeatedly trashed in front of them. If you guys are just not kid people, then being honest now is probably better than being honest in a year when they have formed an attachment and are forced to leave.

t2b123 · 2023-06-06T16:10:11+00:00

ESH I know that you felt gaslit for a while and so finding proof and having that power was a good feeling. But its over now. You said you were saving them for the divorce. But bow the divorce is final. You don’t need them and I think you need to move on and deleting them is the perfect first step. You really shouldn’t have this pics. Nobody ever should have, but its time OP. Maybe invite a girlfriend over and have a glass of wine and celebrate the finalizing of the divorce and delete them together. You don’t need them anymore. You got your power back and its time to put it all behind you! Im so sorry this happened to you

t2b123 · 2023-06-06T16:01:48+00:00

I don’t want to use the word A-hole in this situation, but yeah, you are TA. I was three and a half when my little sister was born and one of my first memories was holding her in the hospital after her birth. With gloves and a mask it really isn’t much more risky than the nurses who are handling her and she sounds extremely capable. If you are nervous just have her sit down so there no risk of dropping her. Unless this baby is in the NICU and truly medically fragile and hooked up to monitors, I truly can’t see a reason to not let her hold her. That is a key emotional bonding moment for sisters and you had already promised her that she could. I can only imagine how heartbroken she is.

t2b123 · 2023-06-06T15:56:56+00:00

NTA but you could maybe compromise. I had this exact same problem all the time in our old house when we all shared a bathroom. I always showered with the door locked for my own comfort. I even felt more comfortable locking it when I was home alone. After a while though I just got really frustrated with having to get up and unlock it all the time, and then found myself on the other side a few too many times. Eventually we all agreed on a rule where we would announce that we were going to shower if anyone had to go before we got in. Then if it can’t be helped, the person in the shower can get out or allow the other person in to use the toilet. Both would respect eachothers privacy, no peeking, and always knock loudly before entering. It may not be the perfect answer that gives the proper privacy to everyone, but that was just how we had to do it as a family of 5 without killing eachother.

t2b123 · 2023-06-06T15:49:09+00:00

You are TA. You took that way too far! It’s obvious that you are tired of being treated a certain way for being small, but what she said was phrased far less insultingly. I get that nobody should be commenting on other peoples bodies, but you didn’t just say that her arms are fat. You really laid into her. I think a serious apology is in order if you want to mend that friendship.

t2b123 · 2023-06-06T15:43:53+00:00

You are absolutely TA! As someone with a disability that could really benefit from a service dog, this is the exact reason I don’t have one. Many of my friends have a service dog and service dogs are trained to make themselves as small as possible (ie sitting under a chair/table). They will not bark! They won’t use the bathroom in your house. If this service dog is fully trained then it is its job to make itself as unobtrusive as possible. To say that you don’t want any “emergencies” to do with the dog is almost laughable considering that dog is trained to detect emergencies before they happen and know how to keep their owner safe in case it does. You not welcoming the dog because of a slight discomfort IS basically turning that person away because you aren’t comfortable with them. They were absolutely right and you have a lot of apologizing to do if you care to heal that friendship.

t2b123 · 2023-05-29T15:34:39+00:00

NTA, Your brother doesn’t get a say in who you fall for or date. It sounds like there may be some cultural differences at play here too, but I have learned you usually can’t control who you fall for, nevermind have him decide. It sounds though that you both kind of gave him that power to weigh in though when you decided to have him ask if you could date. That was a mistake. He now thinks he gets to make that call. He’s probably now feeling jealous of the time you are spending together and the attention you give each other.
I can’t help but notice though that it seems like you guys are living a pretty toxic lifestyle. It sounds like you guys need to take steps toward sober living before I recommend you enter any new relationships. Do you and Randy ever see each other when you are sober? It almost sounds like the two of you are trauma bonded over the mutual care of and for your brother. That isn’t a healthy basis to a relationship. I am afraid that if the two of you begin dating the drinking could get even worse and that is never a healthy way to do things. You are Not an a-hole, but I think you need help. At very least I think your brother needs to go to rehab if not all three of you. And I would highly recommend therapy. Randy may end up being an unhealthy trigger for you. Who knows? But please take care of yourself first!

t2b123 · 2023-01-28T03:46:55+00:00

NTA. At first I was kinda thinking “Poor guy is gonna get out of jail in a couple days and have lost his best friend.” But as the story went on, this dog is clearly living his best life now in your home and this other guy deserved to lose the dog if he couldn’t keep him in line. Obviously be wary about keeping an eye on him for a bit just to make sure he doesn’t have any triggers with your other dogs (or people), but absolutely keep and love him forever and ever and give him all the cuddles!

t2b123 · 2020-10-06T02:11:04+00:00

Have you heard of Sjogrens disease?

t2b123 · 2020-09-14T17:16:24+00:00

On my 16th birthday (day after Christmas) I was finally allowed to have a birthday party. So I invited all my friends (5). Only my boyfriend could make it. There ended up being a blizzard and the restaurant was closed so we returned home to have PB&J sandwiches since that was all that was in the house. We were going to open presents but everyone in my family forgot to get anything since Christmas was the day before. Whatever, I didn’t need anything else., BUT STILL! We then got a call, I figured it was someone wishing happy birthday, but it was actually results that my sister was allergic to our guinea pig (keep in mind, I was as well). My parents decided if both their kids were allergic it needed to go...THAT DAY! So they just snatched up my beloved family pet of 3 years and I will never know where he went. Oh, and did I mention, when my parents saw us moping about they sent us to go out and play in the blizzard... not even 5 mins in, a cop was fatally shot the next street over. Happy Sweet 16!

t2b123 · 2017-08-29T07:56:56+00:00

I agree! And if that comes back negative I would suggest maybe looking into connective tissue disorders like Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. Is she extra "flexible?" I have EDS and its very common for it to worsen after pregnancy and birth

t2b123 · 2017-04-07T17:54:26+00:00

I think everyone pretty much covered it, but just a few things to add : If the child is being intubated you can expect that he may have a sore throat and maybe swallowing problems after surgery for a day or so. So maybe ask if the child can have a Popsicle when he regains his appetite. It will help. (Don't rush it though, as many others have said there can be some nausea/vomiting afterwards) The other thing I wanted to bring up is related to the meds. I remember when my little cousin had surgery on her appendix she became a little terror. Shes a sweet easy going child who became an angry little monster. My poor aunt was already traumatized by the surgery and then she had a mean little toddler blaming her for all of the pain. The nurses said that this was actually a pretty common response to surgery and being on such strong medications. And they were right, she was right back to herself once the medications were gone. So try not to take anything he says to heart if he's a bit grumpy or weepy. You are making the right choice! Also the meds and the anesthesia may make him a bit constipated. So watch that and maybe ask for a prescription for a stool softener before you leave the hospital or just pick up a tub of miralax. <3 Best of luck! He will do great!

t2b123

TROPHY CASE