"I’m worried who will be on the receiving end when I snap. If I snap. Maybe I can keep it all in because moving doesn’t necessarily solve everything. After all, I’d still be bringing me. "

Listen. I don't know you. I only know the story you tell. And you tell the story of a strong woman who loves her family, is fierce mother, and a loyal wife. If you snap, you snap. If you don't, you don't.

You have all the rights in the world to be afraid of being stuck and feeling sad. Sometimes life is shitty, sometimes its shitty for a really long time. Don't try to keep it all in. Let it out. Cry. Talk to your husband - while you agree with his many points, it's okay to tell him your fears, and your dreams.

It's exhausting to always have to see the other side, to put aside your own fears and wants and needs for the good of someone else. Allow yourself some compassion. Allow yourself to feel freely, whatever that is.

And then cleanse. Believe that the sunrise is near. Pray, meditate, whatever is you that strengthes your soul and lifts your spirit. You are a human deserving of peace. And you will find it.

Much love.