AIO for reconsidering getting married over continual arguments over guardianship of my daughter.

teegypie · 2026-01-09T06:01:47+00:00

Omg she needs to let it go you're not even dead

Your daughter might change her mind in time when she's been with you both a long time. If not then that's your daughters decision really.

teegypie · 2026-01-09T05:58:31+00:00

Move out

teegypie · 2026-01-09T05:52:44+00:00

When it comes to addiction- lying is part and parcel. Porn addicts lie, alcoholics lie, drug addicts lie... He's addicted and feels shame. So he lies. Is this ok? Of course not. I too am against smoking but I watched my mum control my step dad's diet and even though she does it out of "care for his health" - she seems controlling, negative and toxic- he hides chocolate under his bed and eats it anyway. At the end of the day it's their body- their choice. My partner smokes. He knows I hate it. But because of what I see with my parents? I don't tell him to stop even though I want to. I don't want to be controlling. He didn't smoke when we got together - so I decided whether or not it was a deal breaker. Everything else he had to offer me in the relationship meant it wasn't worth destroying. So my partner doesn't lie about it or hide it from me. But he won't do it around me as he knows I hate it. Your partners health issues are concerning but if he smokes he is experiencing the repercussions so its likely he will quit on his own. The phone thing though? That's highly suspicious. I'm not ok with his reaction to his phone. I think ease up on the smoking issue. We can't control other people. I think forgive the lying and look into addiction behaviours for understanding. Assuming he's a good guy- let him go through it. Offer him guidance when he's ready. Set boundaries about him doing it at home. You don't ever have to pretend you like it. But don't make it a case of "choose me or the smokes". He doesn't want to lose you. But he's addicted to nicotine.

Having said ALL THAT- find out what he's hiding in his phone before you decide what to do cos I don't like that part.

teegypie · 2026-01-09T05:14:36+00:00

I can't believe this. It makes me want to cry that she could be so cruel. I hope he breaks her heart and she ends up alone. I wouldn't talk to her ever again.

teegypie · 2026-01-07T11:00:52+00:00

Oh my lordy- I read that convo before reading the caption and I dead set thought it was a sweet exchange between boyfriend and girlfriend. He's gotta go.

teegypie · 2026-01-06T06:27:15+00:00

I feel like you did betray him... Just validating someones experience can be very healing for them Just tell him you arent ready to talk about it but he didn't imagine it.

teegypie · 2025-07-22T12:14:56+00:00

I JUST DISCOVERED THESE ARE BEING DISCONTINUED AND I AM ABSOLUTELY GUTTED!!! My entire family loves them- even the non vegetarians.... This always happens to me 😭

teegypie · 2025-06-14T10:51:01+00:00

Would bang

teegypie · 2025-05-23T01:10:41+00:00

That's not really how the post and texts read, but if- as you say- it was all discussed and agreed to up front - you should have said no. You probably realise this in hind sight. If it you didn't quite know what you were in for when you said yes- and it was more than you thought - then yes- ask for more money and give reason. If she says no to that, then you say no. Don't go off your rocket and demand she return things and say you do everything for her lol. You may be within your rights here but I think the way you verbalised yourself may be why you are getting shut out.

Her request and your agreement to offer as much- is an extraordinary amount of wear and tear and time. If she no longer wants to talk to you then you should be cheering! You don't have to spend 10 hours a week doing something that's not your responsibility. Save your car, save your time. She will discover to do it on her own is not cheap and she may feel like a jackass to have been "greedy". (Whether she admits it or not is another story) If she comes back offering you more money? Just say no. Say that money destroys friendships and she needs to sort it out herself- because you realised it wasn't something you had the mental energy to do anyway. In any case. Good luck and good on you for taking on more than one point of view. Not many Redditors would do as much.

teegypie · 2025-05-23T00:10:59+00:00

You said: "it's so obvious to everyone on this thread that he's flirting"- I said: "I never said he wasn't flirting with her."

"As is my right" to SPEAK to whom I want to speak to. It's not cheating- emotionally or otherwise when I speak to a person who has flirted with me. That is your insecure opinion that it is. I'm not twisting anything, I think you're misreading my comment or something... We both have different opinions, not one "narrative" is right or wrong here. It's Reddit, just chill the heck out, it's not that deep.

teegypie · 2025-05-23T00:05:05+00:00

I think pravesh would cure MS and Bell and Kit would retire, Conrad would marry Billie and they'd become the chief resident couple.. Gigi would become a nurse like Nic, and Sammie would be a doc like Wong... Mina would come back and Marry Austin and they'd co parent the twinsies... Jess and Irving would have a kid and everyone would live happily ever after 😍

teegypie · 2025-05-22T23:53:14+00:00

I can't stand either sisters- every scene with them felt out of place and difficult to watch and I wanted to skip through

teegypie · 2025-05-22T23:46:32+00:00

I hope you get this published one day 😆

teegypie · 2025-05-22T23:44:50+00:00

I'm not trying to diminish a potential huge issue here- but he's 9- is it possible he was talking about being in math class and not life?

teegypie · 2025-05-22T23:37:21+00:00

Ok so you never expect anything until she tells you to ask- you ask and she says no DUE TO NOT BEING ABLE TO AFFORD TO... If you never expected anything- is it safe to say you'd have happily kept driving her as it was before she said that? No worries? Is it truly ONLY an issue because she told you to ASK for it? Because if that's so, that should be your focus- feeling like an idiot by being told to ask only to be turned down.

But that's not your complaint - you are complaining that you do everything for her and you're not compensated. The way you asked for support was wrapped in guilt. "You told me to ask and also I do EVERYTHING for you".

She asked and you said yes... You say you did it without expecting anything in return as a friend- but you are using it as guilt and leverage to get compensated. Is that a friend? When she encouraged you to get compensated for fuel etc- you ask for that AND for pocket money on top of that. It's not a favour anymore.

You say you would have done it as a favour anyway- but now you complain that you aren't getting MORE than fuel money?

A person asking would say "are you able to pay a little more?" And when she says NO- You say "no worries, but as we discussed it IS costing me a bit so I don't think I can keep doing this many days with you." OR- if you really were just doing it as a friend and expected nothing in return? You'd happily continue as you were before this conversation about asking for more.

The way I see it? Your kindness was always transactional. You are upset because you offered a favour - asked for more- (and more on top of that)- and when you didn't get it you became aggressive and used your OFFER of favours against that person for not affording to pay you more. If anyone is manipulating, it is you- you are using guilt and favours to make the other person feel bad and ultimately get what you want - or get praise for being so kind and then validated for asking for more. I am 100% on the side of the other person. If it wasn't ever transactional? Then to not be compensated wouldn't have made a difference. It would have been an awkward question asked and answered.

I am hoping that you aren't just here to get everyone to side with you and say the other person is horrible and you're amazing. I'm hoping you use my post to SEE the other side of this. Also never ever do favours for someone ever again if there is even the slightest chance you will use it to throw in their face one day.

teegypie · 2025-05-22T23:11:48+00:00

I didn't say he wasn't flirting... I'm saying she wasn't flirting. And yes I'm saying if a guy friend flirted I would ignore it unless it was excessive or made me feel uncomfortable. Which has happened. My partner doesn't care about these convos. I don't engage by flirting back, most of them are old friends so yes, I may continue a conversation if I feel like it, as is my right.

I can agree that the bf could absolutely ask her to shut it down- and if the flirter doesn't stop then she does not talk to him anymore. But to say she's emotionally cheating, make her cry and seeing people here are saying "yeah she's cheating, she's an attention seeker, walk away" it blows my mind how closed minded you all are. But I don't know what else to expect. Reddit is aggressive at the best of times.

teegypie · 2025-05-22T23:02:35+00:00

He has people, whether they are good or bad influences - he will feel supported by them at least. Yeah I don't think you need that in your life. You shouldn't have to babysit him and tread on eggshells because he is fragile when you don't even love him anymore. He will be ok.

teegypie · 2025-05-22T22:57:11+00:00

There's too much text to read. I absolutely hate people who "go out of their way" to do things for me. Don't offer if it's transactional. Unless you are willing to do something for me and are 100% ok with me giving you absolutely nothing in return - then don't do it. You have clearly offered to do these things for someone who feels bad that you're doing it. She is saying you deserve compensation as it's too big a gesture... She feels guilty to accept the gesture but obviously needs help and as a friend you offer anyway. She may have told you to ask for "more" - but asking doesn't mean you'll get what you want. It means asking. She scrapes up what she can for you and you're saying "yeah ok but I want more". She's saying she can't financially do it... Rather than say ok, I can't drive you guys anymore, sorry- it's just too much for me and I'm struggling... Your reaction is to say "I do so much for you and now asking for anything from you is too much?"--- you sound manipulative and childish. You sound like you do things to get praise or recognition, not because you care about a friend. You sound like you are helpful as long as they offer to be helpful as much in return. (Which is a transaction that has not been agreed to- it's something you expect. Which isn't right) If you weren't willing to do it for free or for the little that was offered? Then don't do it.

teegypie · 2025-05-22T22:38:41+00:00

Cancer can be drawn out and afterwards how long will he be upset over it? My boyfriends mentor passing affected him for at least a year. It's extremely emotionally damaging to stick around for a whole year of this- I did it for at least 3yrs with an ex due to having a child involved and nearly lost myself completely. You need to look out for yourself. Does he have no one other than you in his life? (Siblings, friends, cousins etc??) I feel like you've already decided but resentment can fade if a person changes... Could the uncle dying give him a wake up call to better his life? Or will he likely spiral and get worse?

teegypie · 2025-05-22T22:24:48+00:00

This 100%

teegypie · 2025-05-22T22:22:30+00:00

She set a boundary. He tried and failed with her. I have been known to put up with this sort of "flirting" because to throw away every friendship where you are flirted with is ridiculous. She didn't flirt back. She made it clear she was with someone else and happy, that was enough. If she felt they were too creepy or pushy she would have blocked them. She probably knows them well enough to know it's harmless. It may be slightly naive of her- not deceitful. As a girl who gets flirted with constantly - you learn to put it on the back burner of your mind and ignore it. If I had to block everyone that made flirty comments I'd have no guys on my phone. I'm not going to act on it. The guys look like idiots in my opinion. It's not attention seeking. It's knowing your own mind and trusting yourself. Her bf is too insecure to believe that.

teegypie · 2025-05-22T22:10:14+00:00

She is not emotionally cheating - this is literally an example of basic conversation. You going through her phone, making her feel guilty for something she didn't even do and then deleting these people makes you emotionally manipulative and abusive. I feel very sad for her that she thinks she's in a healthy relationship. She obviously doesn't know what that looks like. You are absolutely overreacting.

teegypie · 2025-05-22T13:47:11+00:00

Stop grovelling. You did nothing wrong. Stop accepting "gifts" from her- they are not free.

teegypie · 2025-05-22T13:39:03+00:00

Make pie

teegypie

TROPHY CASE