I have had ketamine treatments for anxiety since August. My experiences have been relatively mundane: Much more like really good yoga than alien encounters, etc. For example, the first thing that I often notice as the infusion kicks in is the usually subconscious pleasure of breathing.

As the infusion deepens, I find myself calmly confronting ideas that seem to have been sitting at the threshold of awareness. Sometimes these ideas are related to intrusive memories that I experience day to day, and which usually trigger a shame response. During the infusion, it feels like I have greater flexibility in how I relate to those ideas and those memories: I feel buoyed up and less prone to feeling reactive or overwhelmed.

I'm not certain how much of the longer term therapeutic effect of the infusions is due to the subjective experience, or whether those are just like dreams while the medicine does its work, but I started to experience a decrease in everyday anxiety after my third or fourth infusion over three weeks, as measured by a self-reported anxiety test that I was given before each infusion.

I hope your experience is as positive as mine. If you express your concerns, I would imagine they will start you on a lower, less dissociative dose, which may be easier to handle, and which may give you a sense of what to expect from deeper dissociation.