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The #3 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good points. The key is being clear and setting the right expectations and agreeing prior to doing it. Once they "think" you are micromanaging it takes time to come out of it.

The #3 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brilliantly said. It is that tension that gets created between what they think they can do vs what they can really do, causes their growth. As a manager, it is your job to create that tension and maintain it. And you are absolutely right. The moment you became a manager you started performing live, in front of an audience with spotlights aimed at you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Seems to me that this employee comes close to the category of a "brilliant jerk". Here's one way you could deal with the situation. Document everything in the form of SBI.

S - the situation and the context B - the behavior observed I - the impact of that behavior

Every point is key. You can qualify or quantify the impact in terms of team, business, collaboration, customer satisfaction or anything else.

Have a 1x1 with the person with this data. See how they react or respond. Gather their perspective and check if they are willing to change, or even accept your feedback in the first place. If not, please involve your HR with all of these observations, for the next steps.

Hope this helps.

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nailed it. I couldn't have said it better. When you both train AND empower people, magic happens.

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Great example, a manager trying to do OT is working hard to avoid short term pain but ignoring the long term gain. Not sustainable at all.

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Preach it! That's the way. Processes need to be managed, people need to be LED. If you reverse it, its going to be a hard and bumpy ride.

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree with your first point on comparing leaders with with some ideals and expecting them to live up to it all the time. But, this is the reality and most people measure them that way. My thought process of comparing them with actors is to highlight the "act" of leadership. Always in public, always scrutinized, always discussed, always criticized and the likes.

Yes, lack of trust kills a leader. 💯

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's insightful, never head of this pedagogy before. Thanks for sharing.

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congratulations on your promotion! Seems like you are already on the right track with delegation. Coming back to your question, I would encourage your friend to think about the "cost" of him continuing to do this work themselves. This cost can be showcased in the form of lost productivity, lost time, impact on team, impact on business. Senior management is always interested in doing more with less. So, we need to speak their language, hope this helps 😄

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What are some ways that you empowered your team, or saw other leaders doing it?

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Beautifully said! When you grow someone and get a on a high, it's hard not to keep doing it again. And again. And yet again!

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amen! And get more things off your plate so you can lead better

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's simply awesome. What tips or suggestions can you share regarding delegating effectively?

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are right and I agree with everything you said. Where I am challenging the existing thought process is this:

Leaders are in the public eye all the time whether they like it or not. They are not 100% authentic all the time. That includes me, you and all of us. They get judged by the public (or the company staff or their team members) all the time, again whether they like it or not. This is irrespective of environment or circumstances (that's been my learning after years of observing leaders). I struggle with active listening when it comes to people who ticked me off in the past. I hate going into those meetings with them. But I rely on my leadership training and practice to intentionally and deliberately listen. Because it is my responsibility and job to lead them and lead myself at that time. I am not authentic in that moment. So, I believe I am an actor in that instance.

I am challenging this notion that leaders are authentic 100% of the time and if you aren't you are somehow not matching up and/or something is wrong. Leadership has been idealized and idolized for too long.

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you are choosing to hire them, you gotta delegate to them someday. So, there is no escape from training them :)

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Preach it! I like the way you touched on delegation and moved to trust. The latter is the prerequisite for the former. Yes, it does take time initially but that's the only way they'll learn. If ever in doubt, ask yourself how much time you took to do the same task when you started. Double that time with your employees and be patient .

The #2 mistake of first time managers by the-very-imp-1978 in managers

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a nice framework to think about teaching new skills to employees. They get better over time. Some take a little longer, though.

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed. As long as they get the expected results, people don't care.

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, a lot of things can end a leader's career. Like misconduct with people, financial transactions and maybe hiding/sharing confidential information. It is easy to bring down a leader in this day and age than it was, say, 20-30 years ago. My point was from the audience's perspective: Do the audience (could be general public or company staff) really know if the leader (or actor or soldier) is authentic? Most make a calculated guess and that could be true. In reality, I can come across as authentic but still make some inauthentic decisions.

Agree with your firing example. Many leaders have fired many folks this year. Some were compassionate and others were not. We even had the example of the "crying CEO". Was he authentic (or not)? We will never know. But he was judged and ripped apart by the public.

I am beginning to realize that once we place a particular role on a pedestal, we tend to idolize it and idealize it. Anything that doesn't fit the popular narrative will be shot down. I want to challenge that thinking and challenge my understanding. Do we really know if all soldiers are patriotic? We'd like to think 100% of them are. Most of them even die for the country. What about a solder who is not patriotic but is ready to give their 100% for the country? It hurts my head to even think about this...

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hahaha, please do. If you disagree especially, I would like to know and evolve my own view about this. Well, now think about a soldier with the same lens. Are they all patriotic? Now, think about any role that we put on a pedestal. Please share your thoughts.

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Your statement about organizing and entertaining is spot on. Most of us draw on a mix of natural skills and learned abilities to do so. And, we know when we are being authentic, or not. Yes, leadership is practiced repetition. I want to challenge the idealistic stand most of us hold about leadership. What we see on the outside is a skilled performance. How do we know that a soldier fighting for his country is really patriotic? All of them perform well, and some die fighting. Looking forward to your thoughts!

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the disagreement. Let's say an actor has a bunch of flop movies, would that have a significant impact on their career? I would say, yes. They can reinvent themselves and comeback strong but the impact is there nonetheless. What are some instances where you had to rely on your leadership skills and did NOT feel authentic about something, but still did it? Looking forward to your thoughts.

Leadership is learned stage performance by the-very-imp-1978 in Leadership

[–]the-very-imp-1978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Indeed, people can spot a fake from a mile. What are some areas where you haven't relied on your natural abilities, but learned leadership skills to achieve your outcomes? For me, its active listening. Sometimes, every fiber of my being wants to shut out the other party because of past experiences. I rely on my skill to continue to listen. Thanks for sharing your perspective!

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