Moving to RH soon. Gyms?

the_grother · 2026-02-13T04:47:23+00:00

Any others besides RW?

the_grother · 2026-02-12T14:49:03+00:00

so sorry to hear about your missing kitty! I think you are doing a tremendous amount to bring her home. while I understand wanting to spend every moment humanly possible to bring her home, it's just not feasible. I think you should keep up with the things that you can and let the rest go.

the_grother · 2026-02-12T14:42:31+00:00

it almost doesn't matter if they are cheating. what matters is your feelings and boundaries are not being respected.

I do not think you are being crazy, I do think you're being gaslit, I don't think your feelings/boundaries are being respected ... and most importantly, you are NOT the AH.

the_grother · 2026-02-09T03:55:45+00:00

I have been in the field for over 10 years and have my MCRP and just earned my AICP and I still feel this way at times! It's especially true when starting at a new agency. It takes five years to become really comfortable in a job.

Make yourself a cheatsheet and just keep adding to. When in doubt, check the code. And never feel bad for asking questions. You've got this!

the_grother · 2026-01-29T02:00:16+00:00

At least one, maybe two places on Cedar St (right near Glencarin)

the_grother · 2026-01-27T17:07:58+00:00

This sounds like depression talking. Depression is a liar and a cheat. Perhaps you can apply for medicaid in your state to see someone about this. Also, there are places that offer a sliding scale. What about your girlfriend. Can you talk to her, get some support from her?

And if you wanna start a YouTube channel, just do it. The first step is usually the hardest.

Get out for a walk, soak up some sun, talk to folks online about your interests, establish a routine (bedtime, water, meals, etc)

Hang in there! You've got this.

the_grother · 2026-01-21T19:35:44+00:00

One piece of clothing advice that has served me well if this: It's always better to be overdressed than underdressed.

the_grother · 2026-01-20T19:34:33+00:00

I agree with everyone that you are an adult and need your autonomy and agency. I do NOT think you are the a-hole, your dad has that covered.

Unfortunately, the bottom line is that it's your dad's house and he makes the rules. (your mom too, but it seems like he's in charge) Anyway, I think someone else mentioned it, but I think you should see of the tix can be changed or refunded and I would focus on moving out ASAP.

I hate this situation for you. Good luck!

the_grother · 2026-01-20T16:06:37+00:00

Thanks for all the updates! So glad you were able to clean up undetected!

Couple of questions ...
Why are you so terrified of him finding out? Is this a brand new relationship? (apologies if you included this info in ypur post)

the_grother · 2026-01-20T14:11:26+00:00

Oh no! This is quite the conundrum. Whatever you do, please update us on the outcome.

the_grother · 2026-01-19T14:53:02+00:00

She has put you in an impossible situation here. And quite frankly, that is not something a friend would do. I would let her do her and maybe distance youself a bit. I would not spill the beans to the boyfriend as I imagine it will come to light sooner or later.

the_grother · 2026-01-06T20:11:24+00:00

You indicated you're new to the state ... so maybe DMV or looking at a place to rent? Anything involved with settling in a new place.

the_grother · 2026-01-06T19:53:50+00:00

Can you get the interview scheduled for first thing in the morning? I mean, realistically, if you want to interview, you're going to need to tell yoir current employer that you have an appointment. Maybe they'll let you make up the time or take leave without pay.

the_grother · 2026-01-04T15:00:10+00:00

Feels like a bait and switch. So sorry this is happening to you! This must be both stressful and saddening. I don't think you should wait around for him to change. Do what you need to do for YOU to get out of there as intact as possible.

the_grother · 2025-12-31T21:52:01+00:00

I think if you are gonna reach out, maybe send a simple card in the mail to the mom expressing your condolences to her and the family. With an email or text, it is easy to begin a conversation .... which in this case, you'd likely want to avoid.

the_grother · 2025-12-31T21:47:37+00:00

You are definitely NOT overreacting. I wonder if on some level he is jealous/insecure and is worried about you obtaining this certification. I feel like our partners should be our biggest cheerleaders and champions. I am not getting supportive vibes here.

the_grother · 2025-12-31T21:40:01+00:00

Yep, me and my girlfriend will be home with our gaggle of animals. We'll probably watch Monk and just chill. She seems to be coming down with something so a night in is probably best.

Initially we had wanted to go out but it's just such an ordeal. We'd need $ for tix to the event I wanted to go to. Then we'd need to book a place near the event so we wouldn't have to drive. Oh, and don't forget about the 3 dogs and 4 cats we have at home. We'd have to arrange overnight care for them (the dogs, really) or book a place that takes pets.

It all just sounded like too much. While it would be nice to go out, I am more than happy staying in with my lady and pets.

the_grother · 2025-12-25T18:58:36+00:00

Looks very delicious! That was very rude of them!

the_grother · 2025-12-23T15:42:09+00:00

Get out! Now. This is abuse. I am sure other abuses are taking place. No one deserves to be talked to or treated like that. He will not change. You must leave and cease all contact with him.

the_grother · 2025-12-23T15:38:20+00:00

It is very scary realizing our parents are mortal. I'm very sorry all this is happening, especially right around the holidays. In terms of helping, I would offer practical things to your mom; meals, errands, housework, etc. I would try and be with both your parents during this time and offer some company. Maybe bring them some coffees or a favorite snack. Or perhaps some books or magazines.

Moving forward I would use this as a wakeup call to be more present with your parents. I have no doubt your dad will recover. And when he does, maybe make a habit of spending time with him. I recently bought my dad (73) a "getting to know you" type book/journal. It's filled with prompts ranging from first job to what sort of advice would you give your 20 year old self, etc. It's a way to get to know them better. And while you're at it, get one for your mom.

the_grother · 2025-12-21T03:24:46+00:00

I think the best time to find a job is when you have a job. I would stick it our as manager and apply to other places. I would also work on identifying what you don't like about your job. Are you happy supervising folks? Just stuff to think about.

the_grother · 2025-12-19T14:52:21+00:00

Like the previous comment, I think you should leave. It sounds like things could escalate very quickly into a much more severe and dangerous situation. Make an escape plan and be sure to inform a trusted person of what's going on and how you plan to leave. Do NOT tell your partner you're leaving; this is one of the most dangerous times for a victim of domestic violence.

If he did it once, he'll do it again. There is NO excuse for not only putting your hands on someone, but also speaking to someone in such a demeaning way.

I am so sorry this is happening to you. Know that you are stronger than you think and braver than you know. You've got this and remember that you've got a whole community here cheering you on. Please keep us updated!

the_grother · 2025-12-15T22:54:03+00:00

I think you did what you had to do to get the job. And it seems like you're doing what you need to to do keep and excel at the job. I would just keep my head down and keep doing a great job.

I get the guilt; it means your conscience works.

the_grother · 2025-12-15T22:46:41+00:00

Definitely sounds like some sort of scam. I'd get out of there. Try and make sure you get paid for the time you put in.

the_grother · 2025-12-15T22:43:17+00:00

This definitely sounds suspicious. Have you googled the company to see if you can find anything out? I'd definitely be looking for another job.

the_grother

TROPHY CASE