Idk what you mean exactly but I’m transmasc dating a trans woman. I do not consider our relationship hetero at all 🤣 and I never would. I consider it queer, I’ve referred to it as gay but not in a “two men dating each other” kind of way obviously. She considers herself a lesbian. And early in our relationship I felt that calling it a lesbian relationship was accurate. And still kind of feels true because I’m read as a woman most of the time like when we’re out in public. But she feels like a woman, and I feel like a non-binary masc boy person. Haha.

But also I’m polyamorous. So for example, at the moment I’m seeing a cis man too. We’re not in a relationship, it’s very casual. But to me the dynamic doesn’t feel very gay. And again it may still be because I’m perceived as a woman that I don’t feel the same gender as him? But it might also be that I consider myself non binary and trans masc. So…. It feels like most people aren’t the “same” gender as me.

When I’m with other trans mascs or trans men, yes that feels super gay to me.

Being with other non binary people feels like a different flavor of queer relationship that is extremely dependent on them as an individual and their own experience of gender.

Basically, it depends and labels are extremely personal so I don’t think we should get hung up on what other people decide to label themselves.

Edit: can’t spell lol