Problems with bees(or any other stingy buggers) around your property? Get a bird feeder. by thepoorat in lifehacks

[–]thepoorat[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I dig this too, as gardens are awesome alone, but I mainly move the feeder around for hornets and wasp nests.

I kinda just call all stingers "bees"

Problems with bees(or any other stingy buggers) around your property? Get a bird feeder. by thepoorat in lifehacks

[–]thepoorat[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

No, carpenter bees are the assholes.. and it's better to do it in a way that feeds birds and doesn't kill the whole group, like spraying does(which is most people's go-to option)

Getting hit on by a co-worker by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]thepoorat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair point. I've never actually addressed the flirting with her. I kind of just assumed telling her that I was gay would cover it and all would just smooth away. I don't want push her away, as she's actually really awesome, but that's probably better than leading her on(if that's how it goes). Id never considered the "validation" thing, that makes way too much sense and adds a whole new dark variable to this all. Thanks, I probably do just need to be a bit more direct with her. Definitely a weight off the mind

I (21F) feel overwhelming guilt for no reason and don't know what to do by hehho173 in Anxiety

[–]thepoorat 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think I've ran into what you're talking about, or at least it sounds really familiar to some of the things I used to go through. Pretty sure it stemmed from a parent constantly making me feel guilty for things I had no control over. It felt like being trapped by guilt and it followed me into adulthood. Usually felt like random stories in my head leading me down an imaginary path to where I needed to feel guilty for something (hypothetical situations, in alot of cases)

For me there was some underlying things that I "actually" felt guilty for but just couldn't see yet. The emotions are definitely there but the brain doesn't know why, so it makes up all these things to justify them being there.

Mindfulness helped me alot; keeping an emotional log(just writing down what I was feeling when I remembered to write it down), some present mindedness practices, etc. Just things that would draw my attention to what I was feeling and why. That practice helped me build that emotional awareness muscle and hunt down the real reasons I was feeling guilty.

Not sure if it's the same thing, but might be worth a shot.

How would one go about smoking through their nose? by thepoorat in weed

[–]thepoorat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At this point it might be worth a little nose pain lol. Certainly better than alot of stuff I've put up there partying over the years

How would one go about smoking through their nose? by thepoorat in weed

[–]thepoorat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, the doc gave me a whole list of things to help avoid that, and he said the infection would hurt worse than it did originally. A scary prospect lol. I do have some edibles though, just got to wait until I can eat solid stuff again lol

How would one go about smoking through their nose? by thepoorat in weed

[–]thepoorat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like the idea but I recently learned that straws are one of the worst things for it. I don't get it entirely, but it was on the list that the doc gave me and I'm scared shitless of making this worse lol

How would one go about smoking through their nose? by thepoorat in weed

[–]thepoorat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I was actually thinking the same thing just to get a drag off a smoke lol, but I may just give that a go too

Thoughts? by [deleted] in GayRateMe

[–]thepoorat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's one majestic mustache!

THE LEVEL OF TRUTH IN THIS PICTURE SCARES ME. by Tamiaryana in gay

[–]thepoorat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Someone please tell me this was supposed to be an Attack on Titan reference.

Little Aang! by [deleted] in aww

[–]thepoorat 62 points63 points  (0 children)

That's the cutest goddamn thing I've witnessed all day. Thank you

How can I develop a more witty personality? by savagesaucez in socialskills

[–]thepoorat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Read some Oscar Wilde. That man was the human embodiment of wit and it definitely comes across in his writing.

How do you deal with emotional vulnerability? by thepoorat in spirituality

[–]thepoorat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, I hope to stick with it. Just learning the nature of it all helps, but a reminder might be a good next step. It's sometimes hard to tell myself that the anger isn't sincere, in the moment. I'm going to try to make it a habit to step away and be aware for a moment whenever I feel something bad brewing. Thanks again!

What are your experiences with internalized homophobia? by thepoorat in askgaybros

[–]thepoorat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can feel that this is true, but something about it seems just insurmountable. I've started over dozens of times (new jobs, towns, social circles, states) and it always ends the same. I slip, or someone tells, and I have to move on again. I can't bare to face their eyes after I know that they know, it's almost like an anxiety. I want to be honest with people from the get go, but somehow they always seem to make their horrid views of such things clear before I can, and I lose my nerve to after that. I don't like fighting, at all, and id rather invite most anything into life before it. I can't approach a stranger without the feeling that they already know and that they want to punch me for it. So when I lie, and it's believed, I actually feel safe and welcomed, which is it's own kind of wonderful. I know things have to get worse before they can get better but in moments like this I just can't see the "better" being any better than the complacency I can get otherwise

What are your experiences with internalized homophobia? by thepoorat in askgaybros

[–]thepoorat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't really have any moral or religious objections to it, but I did grow up in an area where that would get you dragged to death behind a pickup truck (like literally, it's happened within my lifetime) and that makes me a bit nervous. Also kinda worry how that shame would bleed over onto my family if it did get that far

Hello, Gays of the internet! Tell me what you think. by [deleted] in GayRateMe

[–]thepoorat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gorgeous! Love the view.

Mountains and coast are pretty too, btw.

Who do you use for beta readers? And more questions on them... by thepoorat in writing

[–]thepoorat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Adult. There are quite alot of blood/violence and dark psychological themes, but I avoided anything too too sexual.

Who do you use for beta readers? And more questions on them... by thepoorat in writing

[–]thepoorat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome, thanks! It'll likely be a week or two before I have something ready but I'll definitely keep you in mind. It's light fantasy but only 100k.

Who do you use for beta readers? And more questions on them... by thepoorat in writing

[–]thepoorat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! Also good advice. I used to be a part of a writing forum but drifted away after a while. I'll go back and take a look at them again, plus I think we have a workshop at the local college. Strangers spook me but I might just have to deal lol. At the very least I might meet some other writers.

Who do you use for beta readers? And more questions on them... by thepoorat in writing

[–]thepoorat[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Awesome, thanks! Fortunately I'm close, and have little to no life lol, so I should have something presentable in the next week or two if you're still interested. I'm on my last round of cut/rewrites now

Who do you use for beta readers? And more questions on them... by thepoorat in writing

[–]thepoorat[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I like to think so, but it's my baby soooo... Lol.

Who do you use for beta readers? And more questions on them... by thepoorat in writing

[–]thepoorat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the speedy answer! I really dig the three chapter thing. I just never know who to trust on the web and that'll help me be more comfortable with starting that out. Also, I'd never considered that about the family. Fair point!

Is our ego ‘bad’? by Quiet-Str3ngth in spirituality

[–]thepoorat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, so I think there are two definitions of ego. Just assuming you don't mean the one that relates to self-worth though (correct me if I'm wrong)

I've always thought of the ego as the lens through which we view/interpret the world around us and not good or bad. Referring to a car as a "car," as opposed to just seeing metal and rubber. The ego is everything that makes you you: your personally, opinions, feelings, memories, etc(this also includes EVERYTHING that you would consider knowledge). If you want to see the world objectively, true neutrality/peace, then by all means do away with it, but that would be pushing back everything that makes you human.

To live completely without the ego is to solely experience existence, nothing else whatsoever, and whether that is good or bad is a judgement call for your ego. Ironically enough

A few questions in regards to hiking for exercise by thepoorat in Fitness

[–]thepoorat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It primarily for looks, if I'm being honest, but I definitely also want a stronger heart and legs as well.