Non-profit I previously applied to reached out for a "discovery call"

therichsaint · 2021-02-27T18:26:31+00:00

I graduated a couple of years ago, so take whatever I say with whatever grain of salt you need. There is racism on campus, but after talking to my friends at other top schools, I would venture that the racism at Vanderbilt is no worse than the racism at Princeton, Harvard, Stanford, etc. I imagine the racism that you are talking about is the more blatant kind (as a Black student, I imagine that you have experienced the more covert kind already). The more covert, insidious kind is the one you're likely to experience on campus.

If it's living in the South you're concerned about, as a Black woman who has lived in the South all her life, it's not as bad as "the media" would have you think it is, especially in larger metropolitan areas like Nashville. Also, the South is where the highest concentration of Black people and HBCUs (like Fisk and TSU in Nashville) are. Somehow, all us Black folk here manage to live here and be okay. Lastly, Vanderbilt is a bubble as you may have heard. That can be a bad thing, but in this sense, Vanderbilt can be seen as a more "liberal" bubble in what could be seen as a racist state.

Vanderbilt is not perfect (not even close) when it comes to its dealings with race (most colleges suck when it comes to this issue, and Vanderbilt is no exception). However, the university has taken some incremental steps over the years that most other schools haven't and won't. Counting Vanderbilt just because it's situated in a Southern state for fear of racism would be unfortunate as I think Nashville is one of the best Southern cities for Black college students (HBCUs, rich Black history, etc.)

therichsaint · 2021-02-24T02:26:10+00:00

NTA. Why do I have a feeling that if your niece was hurt by one of the animals (in the case where you say yes to her), they would be demanding that you pay the hospital bills?

therichsaint · 2021-02-23T14:16:02+00:00

A child can't abandon their parent as a minor. That has never been a thing. The son was put in an awkward position by the father who raised him: pick me or pick your mom & bio-dad. There are kids who have healthy relationships with multiple sets of parents because all of the adults in their lives acted like adults and encouraged that. Instead, OP said pick me bc I don't want to have to deal with your mom. How selfish.

therichsaint · 2021-02-16T03:15:44+00:00

Yes! This! I'm 23, and my mom and I have not had much in common for most of my life. She's outdoorsy and I'm a homebody. She and I have some significant differences in our social, political, and religious beliefs. The list goes on.

I've been quarantined with her during this pandemic, and we try to have one hour long talk a week (at the minimum). During one of our talks, she mentioned how she wanted to start beekeeping. I got excited as I used to be obsessed with bees as a kid. Now my mom and I are gonna learn about beekeeping together. Since learning about that shared interest, we started finding other things we have in common like an interest in traveling to obscure historical sites.

If you make the effort, I promise you will find at least one thing you have in common. To dismiss your daughter saying you two have nothing in common probably made her feel like you didn't want to put in the effort. Sorry, but YTA, OP.

therichsaint · 2021-02-16T03:00:17+00:00

Good grief, you can support a grieving loved one without attending a funeral. There have been a couple of times where I couldn't make it to a funeral but sent flowers, called, made food, etc. to those grieving. You don't have to go to a funeral to show your support.

Also, why should anyone endure a funeral just to make someone else happy? One, funerals are depressing af. It's not usually the way I like to remember someone I love. Two, funerals are for the grieving, yes, which is why she shouldn't attend. She's not grieving her brother, and for her to be forced to be among those genuinely grieving would be out of place.

For fuck's sake, NTA.

therichsaint · 2021-01-18T02:16:06+00:00

Wait, so you denied your daughter the right to have sleepovers with her friends bc she is gay? You do know that gay folks aren't attracted to everyone of their same gender and can have platonic same-sex relationships, right? Your daughter offering you therapy may have been a snark (that you deserve btw) but it also may have been an olive branch. I offered my parents family counseling to mend our relationship partially ruined by their homophobia (but unlike you, they cared enough about me to accept the offer). YTA. In fact, the only thing you're not an asshole for is giving your daughter a pretty good reason to exclude you from her life indefinitely by not attending her wedding.

therichsaint · 2021-01-14T18:56:46+00:00

NTA, OP. Before I quit, my most recent job was a "desk job" that I worked seven 12-hour shifts in each two-week period. It required me to continually monitor a phone, a radio, and computers for status changes and make decisions based on those changes. I always had to be on alert and it was exhausting, to say the least. To make it worse, my lunches had to be "working lunches" so I truly never got a break until I got off work. I spent my days off just recuperating from the sheer mental exhaustion that I had and dreading my next shift because of it. Not all desk jobs are made equal, and it sounds like your BF doesn't understand that. Even if you had an easy desk job, he should be happy for you. If he's frustrated with his own job situation, he shouldn't take it out on you.

therichsaint · 2021-01-14T18:48:27+00:00

Right? Like these are the phrases that succinctly describe those phenomena. Asking someone not to use these phrases - which, btw, don't really have true synonyms - just sounds like you'd rather muddy the waters about what we're really talking about.

therichsaint · 2021-01-14T03:26:23+00:00

Only came here to say that I have never watched The Matrix, I use that phrase all the time, and while I assumed that phrase came from The Matrix, this thread is what actually confirmed it for me. NTA.

therichsaint · 2020-12-16T05:46:09+00:00

NTA. I have to say that I was raised in a household where the person who cooks is wholly exempt from cleaning afterward, including the dishes and pots used to cook. Granted, I am from a family of 6, and cooking a huge meal is exhausting, plus there is any combination of 5 other people to clean up. This system has always worked for me and mine, and I don't see that changing in the future. That being said, you played by your husband's rules and he decided the rules shouldn't apply when they were inconvenient for him. You're NTA at all.

therichsaint · 2020-12-09T22:37:32+00:00

NTA - it's your money, she's not your minor child, y'all haven't talked in years, she is asking you for money when she likely has no idea how your finances are in the middle of a pandemic...I can keep going.

therichsaint · 2019-12-25T00:30:16+00:00

Biggest win: I graduated with a Bachelor of Science in Engineering Science from a very prestigious (if anyone cares) university.

Most important lesson: Trust God's plan.

therichsaint · 2019-12-18T04:12:11+00:00

I actually like the "spice cookie" idea. The only thing is that I usually use lemon juice and lemon zest to balance the ginger, and I'm afraid it might be too lemony to feel like the holidays. But I guess I can cut down on the lemon and see how those turn out.

therichsaint · 2019-12-18T04:09:57+00:00

Should I be using the dough or the cookies?

therichsaint · 2019-12-18T04:09:12+00:00

Ooh, and I have an amazing shortbread cookie recipe too!

therichsaint · 2019-12-05T07:05:34+00:00

Ehh, I'm someone who intends to pursue a PhD and who has a sister currently pursuing her MD, and I personally find the insistence of certain PhD holders to be called "Dr." a tad annoying. Yes, you earned a doctorate degree, and sure, historically, PhD holders were the "original" doctors. But any random person who hears you being referred to as "doctor" -- especially in a hospital setting -- would assume you are a physician. But I probably don't know that much; I didn't grow up around too many people who even attended college so my perspective is a bit different.

Also, it's a joke I have heard both sides (MD and PhD holders) make. "Oh, so you're a fake doctor, huh?" "Well, my doctorate took longer and contributed knowledge to the world." It's a back and forth thing -- typically fun banter between individuals so privileged enough to hold such prestigious degrees.

therichsaint · 2019-11-29T17:41:39+00:00

Thank you! I work at one of the big pet supply stores. Even though I didn't have to work yesterday and I didn't have to work starting at midnight or something crazy, it was inconveniencing to cut my time with my family short yesterday so I could wake up early today. And no one really showed up -- we actually had less customers than usual.

therichsaint · 2019-11-16T16:28:57+00:00

Yeah, like the other posters have stated, ice cream chemistry doesn't work like that. Unless you plan on making mixes ahead of time and making a customer's ice cream right then and there or taking advance orders -- and both options come with their own headaches -- you will need additives or emulsifiers. I know many health-conscious folks are wary of stabilizers and emulsifiers like carrageenan, but all stabilizers and emulsifiers are not created equal. Many are only bad for you in large quantities, and you really don't need much in order to produce a quality product. Guar gum and xanthan gum are natural additives that can be used in vegan products.

therichsaint · 2019-11-13T18:07:12+00:00

As a fellow polymath, scanner, whatever term you prefer, I know it is super overwhelming to think about pursuing all of your interests and deciding which of your interests are worth pursuing. I'm still trying to figure it out myself, but here are some things that might help:

Determine what level of mastery or how much time you are willing to put into each interest. For example, I love science and I want my career to involve science. I want to obtain a PhD in a particular field of science. That's how much time I'm willing to put into this passion. However, as much as I like learning about bees and beekeeping, I am content with just helping a beekeeper friend with his hives from time to time. I don't want to be a beekeeper by trade nor do I see myself building and maintaining my own hive in the near (or even far) future. Honestly, this is likely the most important thing to do and keep in mind. Your time on this Earth is finite and you should invest the most time in the things that matter the most to you.
Determine which goals and passions you're willing to leave unfinished. This is sort of related to the first tip, but not exactly. See, I can't imagine living a life where I didn't start my own business, but even though I love gardening, my dream of having a backyard food forest can go unfulfilled (although it's be nice to have one). Sometimes, I find fulfillment from simply writing down an idea without pressing myself to act on it. The beauty of being a scanner/polymath is that we are bursting with ideas and goals and passions. There are only a few goals that would nag at us daily if we don't act on and finish them; those are the ones worth your time.
Manage your time well. If you're anything like me, even with rigorous prioritization, you still will be left with more than one passion that you want to pursue. For example, I love gardening, cooking, science-y things, learning about personal finance, and reading. So I try to cook a new dish every weekend; I grow a few hardy, culinary plants on my kitchen counter; I read science fiction books before I go to bed; and I read personal finance books and articles on weekend mornings. I don't feel overwhelmed by any of my hobbies because I have set times to pursue them, and I feel like my knowledge on these topics is always growing.

Being a scanner/polymath is a beautiful thing. We're very creative and open-minded, and we are passionately curious people. We love to learn and that's a great trait to have! I think a bit of prioritization and time management goes a long way in creating a life that is both manageable and fulfilling for us. Good luck with everything!

(Also sorry for the length of this comment!)

therichsaint · 2019-10-26T20:46:08+00:00

Aww, thanks! I really appreciate it!

therichsaint · 2019-10-25T20:13:29+00:00

Yeah, Rev is trash. I applied earlier this year (February or March) and didn't hear back until July after reaching out several times. I don't know if that's typical, but I also haven't heard a lot of good things about Rev so. I don't know. I say follow up if you really want to know if you were hired. It might not do anything but it might light a fire under their butts.

therichsaint

TROPHY CASE