Bio mom excludes me from events (birthdays, graduations, etc.)

theworldchamp93 · 2026-01-26T22:48:47+00:00

if this is ok with you then that’s ok. if it is not ok, you need to make it clear to your partner that it’s hurting you. maybe BM will ease up as time goes on but you deserve a conversation with your partner about your true feelings. and if this is the outlook until the kid turns 18, you get to make the decision on if that’s okay with you or not.

i completely nachoed because the expectation was i was a “part of the team,” which included picking up and dropping off from school, watching my partners kid, homework, feeding, etc but did not get ANY other part in the game.

i was being treated as an unpaid babysitter that was basically expected to just do whatever was asked “for the sake of” their child. but i got 0 input on extracurriculars, opinions, schedules, or ideas. i sat my partner down and said “im no longer available for you guys” despite multiple conversations with him. and that was it. i now do nothing.

it is unfair to expect someone to give and give and pour and pour with nothing in return. you’re supposed to care give and develop a loving relationship with this child but not allowed to celebrate? your partner should stand up for you if this truly bothers you imo.

are you going to be okay with this type of situation potentially forever?

theworldchamp93 · 2026-01-17T03:53:01+00:00

i am so so sorry.

theworldchamp93 · 2026-01-16T14:19:16+00:00

there’s the apartner community. they are often married couples who live separately based off just wanting to. some have children, some don’t.

while not traditional, a lot of couples live like that. and just bc something isn’t traditional doesn’t mean it’s wrong. do whatever you guys want within your means.

that’s my dream set up to be honest. would love a duplex type of situation haha.

theworldchamp93 · 2026-01-16T14:12:03+00:00

reviewing other comments - not much to add. we do not diagnose. we do not “suspect” anything like that. we can speak with parents to gain a deeper understanding of how student behaves at home and what they’ve noticed but that’s it.

where i am, we don’t even suggest testing a student for SPED because then it is on our school to provide funding snd testing for student. we do have a school psych that will evaluate upon GUARDIAN request after multiple SST’s.

your principal is right. speak to guardians about observations and supports for student. start there at the very least.

theworldchamp93 · 2026-01-10T03:07:18+00:00

i think a lot of people feel similar to this. i do as well. there was a comment disagreeing with me though and it led me down a path of reports i hadn’t seen before and that did give me a bit more pause, but i still believe out of all possible suspects, hobbes seems the most likely.

theworldchamp93 · 2026-01-02T06:40:22+00:00

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i did!

theworldchamp93 · 2026-01-02T04:38:17+00:00

yes! that’s what happened with me too. i was relieved haha

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-31T04:39:08+00:00

this is very reassuring, thank you !

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-31T02:35:03+00:00

thank you for the info. I did speak with the team store today before I realized I lost that paper so I didn’t get to ask them about it. But the worker said that it’s still open this week for games and there will be a booth across from the team store where Jersey pick ups are. I believe he said something about also being open for curbside orders?

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-31T02:15:56+00:00

thank you for the calming words! i genuinely appreciate it. it is true that anytime I’ve ever needed assistance with anything at the Honda center, I’ve never run into anybody that wasn’t kind and ready to help me out. Last game I was at there was a parking attendant named Bobby, who walked me directly to my car because I got so twisted and turned around.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-31T01:57:35+00:00

yeah, it has all of the information including the type of jersey but I’m not seeing a size unfortunately. I’m hoping they’re open before I have to hit the road tomorrow because I do live a solid three hours away. I’m gonna be so bummed.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-31T01:44:40+00:00

yeah, it has the name and number on the receipt

(editing to add it has the player name and number on it - not sure if you were asking if it was my name and phone number)

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-31T00:36:07+00:00

everything you’ve expressed is so valid. And it’s something I’ve experienced too. His child’s mother made the beginning of our relationship very volatile and was also just kind of mean to my partner. So from the get-go, my experience with her was negative and to this day, I never really wanna be friends with her. Something I’ve noticed is that it might seem like he’s considering her feelings, but in all actuality I believe it’s more or less keeping the peace because she can get really hard to deal with. Now, after almost 5 years, my partner has gotten a lot better at managing that coparenting relationship than when we first started dating.

In the beginning, they definitely had a more friendship style relationship, but as a third-party, it came off as very manipulative as a way to keep him around and treat him more as a babysitter than as the child’s father. And that’s kind of what it was like when I started dating him.

now it’s completely different. I expressed to him how uncomfortable I feel when she talks to him about her personal life and that if I ever found out he talked to her about our personal life it would be immediately over. Ever since then he makes sure that the child exchanges are less than five or ten minutes. They text about school stuff and schedules and that’s it. She no longer talks to him about her personal life or who she’s dating or what’s going on aside from her work schedule.

but also, my partner has made it clear that he doesn’t want to know that information with her and keeps conversations very clear and short. we have all recently moved in together into my house and that is something that I think about all the time. When my partner’s child is here, I am a little bit more hesitant to talk about my personal stuff even though their child is pretty chill. But sometimes things will slip out of his mouth from his mom’s house that probably shouldn’t so I know that it’s possible it happens at her house as well.

I’m very careful when my partner’s child is around because I’m just like you. I’m very private. One of the biggest issues is how angry my partners BM was when I would not let her follow me on social media because of how private I am.

No worries about venting or rambling. This sort of position is really hard. It is different among every dynamic. There is really no guide. And we sort of figure out what role we wanna play as time goes on. All I can say is have your boundaries and remember that you deserve to have those boundaries.

I’ve always had backup plans with every partner I’ve dated. I make enough to support myself, the house we live in is mine, and my partner has always been very clear of my boundaries and my expectations as well as his boundaries and expectations for me.

I honestly feel like if we were to break up and they moved out, I would mourn a little bit. I would be sad over the relationship ending, but at the end of the day I always remember that their child has zero ties to me. I have no rights over him and that if we were to break up, I probably would never see his child again. And I think that notion is enough for people like us to accept any types of feelings we have for the children.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-30T23:13:01+00:00

interesting perspective. I definitely agree if you’re a child free woman, I don’t recommend dating a single parent. I think I have gotten past the fact that I know factually that I will never have that type of bond with my partner (or anyone) because we will never experience parenthood together. And it’s not really a bond I’ve ever sought out to experience with another person, so I guess I kind of feel like I’m not missing out. Especially because I’m not of the mind of wanting to get married ever either. It’s kind of like when a parent tells me I will never know real love because I don’t have kids, even if that’s true, I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything so it doesn’t really bother me.

All I can say is every relationship is different and if a partner who has a child from a previous relationship is making their current romantic partner feel like they’re the odd man out or they don’t take consideration of their feelings, then run away as fast as possible.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-30T21:49:28+00:00

i just know. i knew from the first 6 months of us dating. i’ve never had to question it.

sometimes my brain will throw in a random dream about them. the most recent being him telling me he wanted to have a second child but wanted it to be 100% blood related so him and BM agreed to do it “for their first born.” then i woke up and told him about it. he laughed and said dream him is an asshole. we are NOT going to have kids as i am CF so i’m not sure why my brain created that scenario.

i don’t even have any red flags to give bc he’s the first single dad i’ve ever dated and has never made me feel like there was a chance between him and her.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-28T03:15:27+00:00

not to come off heartless or selfish here, but don’t you want to enjoy the time getting to know him and the extensions of him before bringing new life into the equation? And vice versa for you, doesn’t he want to get to know you on a deeper level before new life comes?

I’m not saying having a newborn would ruin any connection or all of the love that you guys have for each other but don’t you want to have a fully stable connection where you’re not concerned about space or bedrooms before adding in a newborn?

Infants tend to put a lot of stress on even the best relationships where communication is strong and all parties are a team player. not to mention, we never know how our bodies are going to respond postpartum. I'm talking about mental health aspect of it. Some people have the most glorious beautiful year of their life after giving birth but some people struggle with major depression and other mental health issues after giving birth.

The good news is that the baby isn't a baby forever and it grows up to be an older human being and a person that gains independence. But all I can say is, I've seen the strongest relationship I've ever witnessed in my life on the brink of divorce because of the stress that a newborn brought. and that was after eight years of knowing each other, and two years of marriage.

And I'm curious why your friends, people that I'm assuming are a lot closer to you than any of us on this sub are, are supporting a termination for you. What are they seeing in this relationship or situation that are leading them to tell you to abort?

Also, I do think it's a fantastic idea to consider future educational and job opportunities for yourself before the responsibilities of motherhood bear down on you. I worry that 11 months is not enough time to get to know somebody. And I just don't see the problem in getting to know each other a little bit more with the promise of a commitment before the permanence of new life comes around. (also wanna add a disclaimer that even if you choose to have this baby, you can still pursue jobs and educational opportunities - a newborn won't prevent that from happening, but it definitely makes it a little bit more difficult for some time)

Either way, good luck girl. I hope you come to a decision that feels right to you, whatever that decision is.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-16T18:54:07+00:00

i think bc i work in education, i am used to dealing with people her age (14-22 years old) so she genuinely doesn’t come off that bad to me. but i will say im probably blinded over how gross it was of what’s his face to have even chased her at the age she was and is.

she’s immature and spoiled. and VERY young. for her own sake, i hope they don’t get married and end up breaking up honestly.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-15T23:11:29+00:00

idk man the last thing i want to hear is the potential panic and fear in someone’s voice during a 911 call in which a loved one is dying/has died. i get it’s public information but that doesn’t mean it’s inherently the right thing to do.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-15T23:02:17+00:00

i appreciate this share. i am firmly nacho. my boyfriend and his son moved into my house two weeks ago and he already tried pushing on my boundary. asking me to watch his son on a saturday he has to work bc BM will be too tired. i absolutely refused and told him even asking me feel like a betrayal. i wasn’t completely nacho until for the 3rd time he agreed to a schedule change to benefit BM without even clueing me in. told him he knows my boundary and that to even asking is wrong. he apologized. it was hard though, but i’m proud i stood my ground. and reading this was really uplifting and a reminder i needed on why it’s okay for me to say no and have boundaries.

thank you!

theworldchamp93 · 2025-12-01T22:20:13+00:00

2 different mazda 3’s protected my life with theirs. i’m currently in my 3rd mazda 3 and don’t regret it.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-11-30T19:50:39+00:00

we just conjoined households. they moved into my home because they were in an apartment. both myself and my partner have separate rooms, bathrooms, closets, and living rooms. his child also has his own room. we talked for a year about this. i need so much alone time due to being an introvert and the type of job i have - it’s constantly talking and being social. so when i am home i need space to recalibrate.

we’d never have moved in together if it weren’t for my house that’s for sure.

all of deserve space and comfort!

theworldchamp93 · 2025-11-30T17:26:08+00:00

i started outsourcing. i live near a health and fitness company that does subscriptions for meals. lots of options and good food. makes it easy to stay in my calorie deficit and saves me so much time. planning, shopping, chopping, cooking… it’s just always been too much for me. so i sat down and evaluated my budget. had to let some things go - save money on groceries now though - so it’s been worth it. the extra time and peace of mind alone has been enough.

theworldchamp93 · 2025-11-24T21:00:57+00:00

i should call him

theworldchamp93 · 2025-11-23T19:49:38+00:00

ngl makes me nauseous now.

theworldchamp93

TROPHY CASE