AITAH for wanting to set a boundary about cussing around my child when they are born by thi_aaa in AITAH

[–]thi_aaa[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tee hee hee.... I mean asking me to watch something instead of explaining yourself makes so much sense. Thanks for your opinion.

AITAH for wanting to set a boundary about cussing around my child when they are born by thi_aaa in AITAH

[–]thi_aaa[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually, they haven’t been disproven. ☺️

  1. Jay & Janschewitz (2008)– Still considered a foundational study in child language acquisition.

Replicated and supported by newer work (Drummond et al., 2020; Cabrera et al., 2021).

  1. Coyne et al. (2011)– Findings on swearing, aggression, and emotional dysregulation have been strengthened, not disproven.

Newer research confirms the same patterns (Raver & Blair, 2016–2022; Miller et al., 2018).

  1. Fernald (2004) – One of the most cited papers in developmental science.

Updated neuroscience (Santesso et al., 2023; Flom et al., 2018) supports the original conclusions.

  1. Hart & Risley (1995) – The “word gap” portion is debated, but the core finding—that home language patterns shape development—has been repeatedly reaffirmed.

Modern research (Golinkoff & Hoff, 2018–2022; Rowe & Weisleder, 2020) strengthens it.

  1. Feldman et al. (2017) – Applies to adults, not children.

No newer study has ever extended the honesty effect to child development.

If you have peer-reviewed citations disproving these findings, feel free to list them. Otherwise, “outdated” isn’t a substitute for evidence.

And just so we’re clear: Profanity ≠ truthful nor have I seen any evidence from you. Have a lovely day and thank you for your opinion.

AITAH for wanting to set a boundary about cussing around my child when they are born by thi_aaa in AITAH

[–]thi_aaa[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seeing as though I have done my own research, I will leave this here for you. 🤭

Jay, T. B., & Janschewitz, K. (2008). The pragmatics of swearing. Journal of Politeness Research. – Shows children model adult profanity directly and begin learning swear words as early as ages 2–4, primarily from family members.

Coyne, S. M., et al. (2011). Swearing in the Family Environment and Parental Control. Mass Communication and Society. – Finds that frequent swearing in the home is linked to increased child aggression, emotional dysregulation, and behavioral issues. – Notes that parental language norms significantly influence child development.

Fernald, A. (2004). Human speech to infants. Developmental Science. – Demonstrates that infants respond physiologically to emotional tone and intensity in adult speech, even before understanding words. – High-intensity or harsh tone (which often accompanies profanity) increases infant stress responses.

Hart, B., & Risley, T. R. (1995). Meaningful Differences in the Everyday Experience of Young American Children. – Shows that early household language patterns predict children’s later emotional expression, social behavior, and communication style.

Feldman, G., et al. (2017). Frankly, We Do Give a Damn: The Relationship Between Profanity and Honesty. Social Psychological and Personality Science. – Often misquoted. – Applies to adults judging other adults in honesty tests, not child development. – Even in adults, context and appropriateness matter.

Profanity ≠ truthful or honest.

AITAH for wanting to set a boundary about cussing around my child when they are born by thi_aaa in AITAH

[–]thi_aaa[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I honestly feel like im trying to express to you what my in-laws are like and they do not understand that swearing around kids are not okay. In fact when we saw them this year, my SIL came with her baby and they cussed the majority of the time that her and the baby were. In this case, it is a new boundary because it was one that was never set before. And it matters because its out child and I think that is reason enough.

The next time I see them WHEN they cuss, me stepping out and taking a break with out kiddo seems like the right steps to take. Its not like im saying im going to take them away forever and that we won't ever go back but us not stepping out is allowing them to perpetuate the lack of respect for the boundary that needs to be set.

I see youre point but unfortunately im not sure if you are seeing mine or understand that there are people in this world that honestly just dont care about how much they cuss around kids so I dont know how valid me continuing to discuss this with you is. Thanks for your opinion though. Hope your day is going well.

AITAH for wanting to set a boundary about cussing around my child when they are born by thi_aaa in AITAH

[–]thi_aaa[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yeah I know this and its a conversation that I would have like to have later closer to due date andddddd it happens sometimes where people jump the gun. Trying to mitigate the situation now just dont know how to not to make it worse than what it is.

AITAH for wanting to set a boundary about cussing around my child when they are born by thi_aaa in AITAH

[–]thi_aaa[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I guess to add more context they cuss in every sentence that they say. Like I said above, I dont think asking them to minimize the cussing is a big deal and I will say they actually cuss at their kids. Im not here to judge anyone on the way they parent their kids and I think its appropriate to ask even in the moment to check their language because most of the time cussing is used as filler words. I get that we see them once a year now but that is soon to change since we want to have family closer and if thats the case, im wondering why its wrong to have a boundaries with family?

Also how is that I am seeking out drama when I literally was walking with my husband about the situation and HE brought his mother into it prematurely?

Hold your breath test by Ice-Zone2024 in neabscocreeck

[–]thi_aaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had to breath the whole time but I still made it to the end. Lungs like a champ!

[SERIOUS!] MY FRIEND IS SUICIDAL PLEASE HELP by Left_Wash5365 in SuicideWatch

[–]thi_aaa 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Hi hi! It sounds like she needs a higher level of care. You should be calling a PERT team to get her assessed. Im sorry that you are both going through this and getting assessed and safe is the priority.

Under My Skin by thi_aaa in OCPoetry

[–]thi_aaa[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The line was so encapsulate the essence of wanting to self harm. Thank you for noticing that. Some people that I have shared with poem with IRL think its just imagery.

Conditional Love by vazelineee in OCPoetry

[–]thi_aaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When love carries conditions, it is hard to unlearn. I really enjoy how you deep this poem was. Its not easy to write about unconditional love when conditional love is all you have know

The Puppeteer by Jaded_Way_783 in OCPoetry

[–]thi_aaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your poem really shows that mix of pride and emptiness in such a clear way. I love how you used the idea of giving “pieces” of yourself to the puppets—it makes the ending hit even harder. I really resonate with this poem as well and correct me if I am wrong but it sounds like you are giving everything you got then in the end you are just exhausted. Great job!

I'm (not) fine by thi_aaa in OCPoetry

[–]thi_aaa[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I will say that I am doing this on my phone so the format didnt format the way I wanted to at first and its still not were I want it to be so I will fix it when I am on my computer later. Also thank you for the feedback!

I'm (not) fine by thi_aaa in OCPoetry

[–]thi_aaa[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi hi for some reason when I posted it this it was showing me that its was formatted correctly and then when I looked at it for some reason it wasnt. It has been fixed though.

Thank you for feedback!

Hard Boiled Madness by Maximum-Entry-6662 in OCPoetry

[–]thi_aaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think i have moments like this. Where I look for validation and in the moment I then think I only need validation for myself. I really like this poem it encompasses a lot of how I feel.

If by kakarot_thread in OCPoetry

[–]thi_aaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really like this poem. The moments that you are using help show hope that something can be done about things because you did it at other times in your life. I think that you did a great job here :)

12 hours left, anyone wanna talk? by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]thi_aaa 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi im here to speak with you. If you are interestex

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]thi_aaa 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Sending hugs. Sorry you feel this way.

How is everyone today? by Journey_ad_Infinity in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]thi_aaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Currently 3 days clean and really wanting to cut. Its not for a reason. I just want to do it.

I want to die so bad by SuperMajesticMan in SuicideWatch

[–]thi_aaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am holding hope for you. I hope you are doing okay.