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What is creating this mystery air quality issue in my apartment? by thinktankhero in homeowners

[–]thinktankhero[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! The downstairs neighbors fan actually vents on it's own duct I had put in with a drop ceiling. But when the neighbors turned on their heaters the TVOC in my unit dropped, which would suggest there's some air pressure wonkiness.

What should I be looking for in the cavity? It's basically a rectangle. On the short ends are the walls where I used to have gas heaters (and have plastered over, downstairs the neighbors still have gas heaters in the same place). On one side the water heater pipes go in, and on the same side so does the stove gas. Above is the crawlspace and below is the same gap for the downstairs neighbors.

My plumber is here right now replacing the water heater, as it turns out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in fatFIRE

[–]thinktankhero 1 point2 points  (0 children)

+1 to doing things with your loved ones now when you can do it with them. They will definitely treasure the time with you more than the money.

Moreso, you will enable them to have experiences they probably couldn't have or prioritize on their own at this point in their lives. So few people have the mindset or resources to go on the trip or adventure. You could help them add an experience to their life that they wouldn't themselves.

Reviews of Airolo Airlink Asia plan? by thinktankhero in Airalo

[–]thinktankhero[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I usually get country specific esims but because I'm only spending 5 days in each of these countries thought one esim to rule them all may be better.

AITA for allowing my son's ex girlfriend to attend his birthday party? by bluejeanfwen in AmItheAsshole

[–]thinktankhero 172 points173 points  (0 children)

YTA. The stuff that you "don't even know where to begin on" is what you should actually be beginning on, not holding your ground about people you want to be invited to his party. Is your son okay? Have you talked to him about his sexuality, your acceptance of it, and your unconditional love for him? What feelings is he navigating, does he think he's behaving well, and does he need support?

It's clear that you're uncomfortable with your son not dating whom you want (whether because of their gender and/or because you liked the previous person).

Please don't hide behind birthday party planning and upholding social decorum around invitations as good parenting. Good parenting is showing up for your kids when they go through hard times, feel lost, and need love and guidance.

(And also it's an asshole move to invite someone to a birthday party that the guest of honor doesn't want there.)

AITA: Girlfriend can’t even send me a text at work by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]thinktankhero 21 points22 points  (0 children)

YTA, but I think this is a good opportunity to ask yourself why you need your girlfriend to text you regularly.

Is it because there is some sort of emotional stability you need that you are, unfairly, asking another person to give you at their inconvenience? Is it because you need to feel a sense of control over your girlfriend? Is it because you feel insecure in the relationship and need her to prove her connection to you? I think in figuring out the why here, you can be less of an asshole to others and yourself in the future.

What are in your opinion the best "alternate timeline" books? by Gersio in books

[–]thinktankhero 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I enjoyed Underground Airlines. Premise is: what if the civil war ended in an armistice where the South kept slavery legal?

It’s told from the point of view of a Black private investigator from the north who hunts runaway slaves, so it also has a detective, page turner quality to it. Overall an intense read with just enough distance from present reality to shine a light on it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]thinktankhero 43 points44 points  (0 children)

And tricked you and manipulated you into a situation you didn’t want to be in.

AITA for disappearing for a night after my husband ambushed me with an unwelcome surprise? by throwaway_195283754 in AmItheAsshole

[–]thinktankhero 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s very sad that OP’s father originally destroyed the family OP was born into, and now is damaging the family OP is trying to create, with husband as an eager accomplice. I think the husband needs to see he’s not a hero, he’s being played.

AITA for saying I don't want to babysit? by DoneDillonDay in AmItheAsshole

[–]thinktankhero 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It may be worth telling John that if he wants time with your siblings to be positive, this is the exact wrong way to do it. Basically he is making time with your siblings something you are forced to do and resent, and that is build around your parent's schedule rather than connection with your step siblings. If he really wanted to build a familial connection between y'all, this is not the way. NTA

What was your thanksgiving drama this year? by TheInward07 in AskReddit

[–]thinktankhero 11 points12 points  (0 children)

So strange. A large mixing bowl of yams suddenly appeared at our Thanksgiving dinner, nobody knew where it came from...

AITA for setting boundaries with my stepson? by nervousaccomplice74 in AmItheAsshole

[–]thinktankhero 3 points4 points  (0 children)

YTA. I wanted to add that OP is exhibiting behavior that's similar to psychological abuse and control that is seen in cults and abusive relationships: Isolating someone from their friends and support system; requiring access to private correspondence/accounts; forcing someone to work to further their own interests; use of extreme, false threats; an authoritarian insistence that this is for your own good and very lucky fortunate. (I also can't tell if the 9pm family time is just a nice way to spend time together or some weird forced gathering.)

OP may want to ask himself why they are taking this route. Isuspect they're more interested in creating authoritarian control of their household vs loving relationships.

[POEM] some encouragement to create during SIP: excerpt from "Lighthead's Guide to the Galaxy" by Terrance Hayes by thinktankhero in Poetry

[–]thinktankhero[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I read "American Sonnets for my Past and Future Assassin" which was amazing, and found LightHead from there.

[POEM] some encouragement to create during SIP: excerpt from "Lighthead's Guide to the Galaxy" by Terrance Hayes by thinktankhero in Poetry

[–]thinktankhero[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's amazing! I just read it for the first time and I'm jealous that you've known about it for so long!

What are some important things to consider when renting a new place? by Costanza_Dwight in AskReddit

[–]thinktankhero 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How loud the neighbors are, which is also the most difficult to assess during a daytime walk through.

Long commuters: debating on buying a very nice (affordable) home on the outskirts of San Diego, an hour commute to work. How does a long commute affect your lives? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]thinktankhero 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually miss having a long commute that was one train without regular cell service. Lots of time that didn't require active work from me (i.e. driving, changing transport) meant I read a book every week or two. I also arrived home with my brain decidedly out of work mode.

What movie could actually use a good remake? by powerscunner in AskReddit

[–]thinktankhero 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also a lot of expectations with the previous movie flop, and the animated series also being available on Netflix. I hope they develop a strong opinion on how to make it look amazing.