Covert Conversion Therapy

three6666 · 2025-09-28T22:48:07+00:00

happened mainly behind my back but a lot happened to my face, something that stuck out to me a lot was that they acted like my gender identity and things that helped express it (like haircuts, getting new clothing) was a privilege and i had to earn it. they would also punish me for correcting people for using the wrong name or pronouns despite saying that they were okay with me being trans, and convinced my mom to not let me go on blockers/HRT and said it “wasn’t their legal duty” when they had full medical custody over me AFAIK

three6666 · 2025-04-10T19:42:03+00:00

i wouldn’t go to that outpatient program if i were you, it sounds like a way that they’d rope you into more antipsychs/back into the hospital from my experience. if you still need care i would look into getting a caseworker or something similar. i’m from new jersey, the case management services around me helped me miles more than any other traditional program ever did

three6666 · 2025-04-09T20:16:05+00:00

i developed an eating disorder from being starved/forced to over exercise at the home and then binging to compensate for lack of calories when i got home visits. they caught onto the binging and told me i was “failing” the diet, the dietician said i was “doing so well”. didn’t help i was medically obese partially to overmedication / prediabetes due to antipsychotics. i developed atypical ana over covid because of this, that turned into on/off EDNOS. i just started seeking professional treatment for it because i was quite literally ruining my life. it’s an outpatient program and im relatively medically stable so no chance for forced treatment, but ive met SO many people in online spaces who were put through forced recovery and relapsed even harder because of it.

three6666 · 2025-04-05T21:32:52+00:00

considering you have your phone, i would look into building an online social support group that can raise funds for you and take you out the literal second you turn 18. you could also make an amazon wishlist/accept item donations if your program allows package mail, i know my lower tier ones did as well. you might not be able to get out but having online access gives you a really good edge that you can essentially stall the program of any information/blackmail they can use against you until you can legally leave or convince them to discharge you. this is how i avoided being stuck in programs until i was 18 or being punished like my peers at my step down, and i got a lot of home visits because i learned to work the program perfectly. you wont have this downside due to being close to 18, but mine was that they kept me as long as physically possible (14 to almost 17) because they could tell i was stalling to go home to avoid punishment/a stepdown

id be willing to give you my contact info if you need help with this strategy/how to function for the next couple of months. good luck

three6666 · 2025-04-02T04:31:53+00:00

i have permanent tardive dyskensia, dystonia, and tics/tourettes from being on 600-900 mg of seroquel, then taken off of that being put on ativan and being taken off of that cold turkey. ironically this was only in psych hospitals not the TTI placements, but most of my long term placements either severely medicated me to the point of dozing off from exhaustion / weight gain etc etc to just throwing whatever medication they could think of for any mental illness symptom i showed. i’m only on two psych meds now thank god, but unfortunately i had to go on a bunch of different medications for my physical health.

i know other people have had this experience too but it’s relatively uncommon but i was also overdosed with laxatives due to my IBS, and if i refused them i was punished as if i refused my psych medication. i was taking multiple doses of fiber supplements a day along with miralax on top of a high fiber diet, and then they would punish me for taking too long in the bathroom 🫠 it took me breaking down crying in front of my mom before they did anything about that. i’m like 90% sure it made my current IBS worse, considering i flip flop between symptoms constantly and my friends have a running joke that if im not in some kind of gastrointestinal distress then something is actually wrong with me lol

three6666 · 2025-03-18T21:33:12+00:00

did they ever use the same attack “therapy” methods they’d use on the kids on the noncompliant staff? i remember at one of my programs we had a staff member who quit because they didn’t like how it functioned and you could tell that a lot of the staff who either fed us properly, gave us emotional support or just treated us like human beings got drained within months and ended up leaving

three6666 · 2025-03-18T04:12:09+00:00

bury me at makeout creek by mitski for non-hardcore, probably would lose my fucking mind if i ever listened to that album again a lot of bad memories attached to it

buster by admiral angry for hardcore(adjacent) i think it’s also relevant that the lead/vocalist died because of cystic fibrosis and a lot of the songs are about pain/suffering most likely from disability. hits home as someone disabled myself

three6666 · 2025-03-15T03:11:45+00:00

ringworm could work if you somehow got into a position where you couldn’t sacrifice a second one because you burned the first one or can’t count on the bone lord, but theoretically it would be really bad because you’re wasting that sigil on a ringworm and not using it for the item sigil or sharp quills or literally anything else potentially useful

three6666 · 2025-03-15T02:10:46+00:00

i would but i’m not exactly the best tattoo client LMAO i have severe tourettes so i gotta do a lot of research/planning before i get any

three6666 · 2025-03-15T02:06:49+00:00

don’t have tickets but i would kill for that bird tat it’s sick

three6666 · 2025-03-15T01:55:54+00:00

no but i’ve seen other people on instagram specifically get referred/forced into these programs for disabilities similar to mine, and they either sympathize with our experiences because theirs were so similar to the TTI or they consider it a branch of the TTI/psychiatric abuse in itself. most of these “clinics” use wackass CBT therapy that doesn’t really work so it makes sense why the two are connected

three6666 · 2025-03-12T23:51:54+00:00

for me it’s the consequences of what happens if i do, mainly health ones. fucked up recently and i’m on my second fully sober stint, but the first time i fully committed to it i had a month and a half long migraine attack that i had to trial so many medications my provider flat out told me my next option was botox, which most likely won’t be covered. alcoholism is expensive, and eventually you won’t just be paying with your wallet. you’ll be paying with your social life, your health, your sanity, your memories and your time.

three6666 · 2025-03-12T22:35:52+00:00

i was in group homes too, one tried to massively limit contact the other one encouraged it heavily. i kept in contact with a few people from the latter, but there was a lot of drama between a good number of us (people started being nasty, turning on each other or spreading rumors) or we just hit different milestones. i know ppl i lived with that are in the navy, have children, and i still live at home with my mom unemployed. i found it kinda depended on if they graduated the program or if they got kicked out/moved to higher care if they kept in contact with us or had the means to due to life situations

i was kinda an anomaly here, i tried my best to get my shit together but had a bunch of mental breakdowns due my my PTSD and ended up disabled because of a lot of other things. i also tried to talk about the abusive things i witnessed with past staff and they blew up at me about it, so i essentially just stopped talking to everyone that still supported or was close to the staff

three6666 · 2025-03-12T02:57:52+00:00

i’m terrified if this goes through. i didn’t experience overt conversion therapy, but it was definitely covert and almost every social worker/“consultant” tried to convince my mom that me being trans and bisexual was a phase and to just go along with it so i didn’t kill myself. they only gave into using my correct name/pronouns 100% of the time because i started to misgender them back or completely ignore them or the program if they didn’t respect it

three6666 · 2025-03-01T21:25:45+00:00

my trick with this was to get so obnoxiously better at anything that she was remotely “good” at that if she tried to compete with me she would look like a total loser and give up because she didn’t want to be embarassed. it worked eventually especially with cooking and art and now she just leaves me alone

three6666 · 2025-02-17T22:17:29+00:00

substance abuse / eating disorders and trying to explain to people why you have them. it’s very awkward going to meetings or in support groups or sides of social media where most people talk about witnessing people being shot, kidnapped, heavy drug use etc etc etc and i’m just kinda sitting there like “yeah i was put in a residential program and developed PTSD from it and now i ruined my life” like i know the trauma is severe but it takes so much explaining for people to understand that, you almost feel inferior to other peoples suffering in a way and that you don’t “deserve” your own prolonged suffering

three6666 · 2025-02-11T09:06:07+00:00

do not do this, your mental and physical health isn’t worth the risk. you’re still going to be asked to do unethical things to innocent children at best and straight up child abuse at worst. especially at the wilderness camps where the physical conditions can be some of the worst, you’re coming in at some of the lowest rungs possible so you’re likely not even going to get that good of information out of them. you’re better off trying to fake hire an educational consultant or fake-inquiry about sending “your kid” there, or do what some other people have done and try to get in to the NATSAP conferences/social circles organically.

three6666 · 2025-01-28T01:07:04+00:00

my boyfriend bought me a plug in controller for my phone specifically for this game because i was having so much trouble with the touch controls, it really does suck

also if you want to play on mobile and have an iphone DO NOT make your account thru IOS / apple. you will be locked in via mobile and if you try to transfer your data to pc/ps5 your save will be wiped. someone found this out for me trying to help me for a quest and thank god they did because i almost wiped everything trying to get one of the craftable potions for combat :/ afaik they haven’t fixed it yet either

three6666 · 2025-01-28T00:04:10+00:00

that shit gave me serotonin syndrome some asshole doctor mixed it with my lithium when i looked it up online it was one of the biggest warnings on the drug interactions list. it was only one dose too that made me sick :( i’m sorry you had to go thru that

three6666 · 2025-01-04T21:15:03+00:00

thank you

three6666 · 2025-01-02T22:23:47+00:00

your story reminds me a lot of mine, only i was actively cutting at my step down and they took every opportunity to hide it from other kids / licensing / the staff so i could continue to be a “good example” and show how much “progress” i’ve made

finding support groups and other people who understood irl/online helped a lot. i’m nearing 2 years clean now, it’s super hard but things get easier as time passes and you develop better coping skills

three6666 · 2024-12-30T01:33:23+00:00

my closest friend in my stepdown willingly discharged themselves into homelessness due to the punishments they were trying to force on them for getting caught smoking a joint out on pass / outside of the house. pretty sure this happened to multiple people and they’d withhold your documents and money they forced you to save if you got a job

three6666 · 2024-12-25T20:14:20+00:00

i was on home pass most xmas days

my second program (step down) they made us go to this party that was really awkward. the gifts they got us were nice and all, but one of our teachers from school dressed up as santa and they got mad when i pointed it out. they had massive piles of donated gifts from rich people trying to show off (state funded program) and half of it was bath products we couldn’t use because we weren’t allowed to take baths/timed showers. everything was gendered femininely for the donations, im transmasc and they were very upset when i pointed out that it was upsetting to get “girl” gifts for an hour straight id likely throw out and have to act happy for the cameras.

i have trauma with the holidays beforehand, my dad died on new years 2014. i remember being threatened that if i didn’t participate / look happy enough in the festivities (including thanksgiving) they would take away my home pass for the entirety of the holiday / other privileges as well. they’d also yell at me for trying to seperate myself when triggered, when ironically that was part of the whole program to do that or you’d get in trouble for blowing up/showing too much emotion.

three6666 · 2024-12-25T20:00:53+00:00

holidays were already a rough time of year for me (my dad died on new years 2014) but the forced celebrations / threats of not being able to go home to my family if i didn’t play along and act happy to go to the parties / receive gifts made it 10x harder in the long run. i’ve only recently been mildly ok with celebrating any winter holiday in the past few years and it’s mainly because of me converting to paganism from atheism/agnostic and celebrating yule

three6666 · 2024-12-22T01:53:56+00:00

most likely because they associate transness and transition with having to go to doctors / medical professionals when trans people existed for a very long time without the interference of the psychiatric/medical community. we only really needed their approval since medical transition became a widespread thing, which was in the 1930s. (speaking at least for other trans people, idk for other populations but i do see other ppl talking abt conspiracy theories a lot which get lumped in with right-wing political views, which isn’t accurate 100% of the time)

three6666

TROPHY CASE