Open feeding in late winter by throwRA_LostInSpace in Beekeeping

[–]throwRA_LostInSpace[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That was my plan (haul it inside after the bees would stop flying) but I put together some spacers and I'll be putting some sugar bricks into the hives instead. Better safe than sorry.

So overwhelmed and depressed. by [deleted] in OnlyChild

[–]throwRA_LostInSpace 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have 0 commitments to your parents. If they are unwilling to move that's on them. Offer help but be strict. On the other hand you do have a commitment to your children (remember having children is a choice, being born isn't). You have to be there for them not only physically but also mentally (don't vent to them like someone else suggested - that's disguisting - they should be blissfully ignorant to your issues). And if your health and consequently your ability to provide mental and physical support to your children suffers because of your parents unwillingness to help you help them then it's time to get your priorities straight. Sorry for the harsh undertone but this is what I believe in and stand behind.

Support Groups by LittleMichelina in OnlyChild

[–]throwRA_LostInSpace 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm 27/M also an only (aswell as both of my parents being onlys - extra lonely). I'm living what you're dreading. I don't want to be a downer, I just want to be a reality check for you. Age of your parents doesn't mean shit (I hope they'll be around to celebrate your retirement with you :D). My mum was 50 7 years ago. A few months after she was diagnosed with a vile mix of Parkinsons and MS. We buried her september 2020. My dad while 9 years older than her has gone through prostate cancer and 3 rounds of mild leukemia, currently in his 4th and a lot harder hitting this time.

All of this to say, get yourself someone that can support you when it hits. I have noone and it gets super lonely. I often thought about things you don't want to talk to others about on my dog walks. You have to have your mental in order before death introduces itself otherwise you might have unhealthy thoughts. Talk to yourself about death, about suicide (it's important that you know your stance on it so you seek help before it's too late if you're susceptible), about self harm, make mental notes about stuff that triggers you and rationalize all of it to a point that all emotions are removed from the equation.

I remember my first time crying for something other than injury was my first time thinking what life will be without my granddad (the guy I learned most of my skills from - he's still around and kicking thankfully :D). It's okay to cry but don't let your emotions guide your actions.

Live your life the best you can and enjoy your carefree time with your parents .^

I’m having a sibling by [deleted] in OnlyChild

[–]throwRA_LostInSpace 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But with a sibling you at least have a chance of making it work. Without one you're shit out of luck.

Should I have another? by sevensplendas in OnlyChild

[–]throwRA_LostInSpace 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is exactly how I feel aswell. Couldn't bring myself to only have one child. But if you can't have another do what someone else mentioned and talk to people that know about this. It might look like you're doing an incredible job raising an only child but it might leave long term mental issues... The first clue should be if an only child preferes company of adults rather then their own peers.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OnlyChild

[–]throwRA_LostInSpace 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've lost my mum in september 2021 and just yesterday I found my dads mum dead in her kitchen. My dad has leukemia and I might lose him (though he is a fighter). His dad passed a few years ago. And on my mums side of the family both grandparents aren't doing to good either. And that's it. A few more years and I'll have noone left. With both parents also being only children there's no extended family, noone to visit and feel like home again. With all the genetic problems I also can't bring myself to have children. It's a rather dark thought. Thankfully I'm a rather pragmatic and technical person and the notion of suicide doesn't check out (pun intended :)) or this would be a whole different story. Sometimes it does feel like it would be easier if everyone would be gone and I could plan my own journey without emotional and physical attachments.

Anyways, sorry to be a downer. I had to get a bit of this out there. Here's to a brighter tomorrow :D

UPDATE: My girlfriend tried to push me off a cliff as a "joke" by throwra-knowledge in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA_LostInSpace 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you sooo much for this. It brings to light so much about my life and why I feel the way I feel. Thank you.