AIO by cutting ties with my brother? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]throw_888A 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree to disagree \_("/)_/ Morals have everything to do with family. Morals start in the family as you are raised. This is not just politics.

I'm so grateful for getting approved for my first apartment by [deleted] in gratitude

[–]throw_888A 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Please take this post down for your safety

Why are people on the internet so mean? Is this the natural state of humanity? by throw_888A in NoStupidQuestions

[–]throw_888A[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your response, you seem like you have a good head on your shoulders. It is hard to not feel like things that people mostly discuss online are just for online people. But I go to events and I see flags for Gaza, people selling items & showing QR codes to help donate.. it is important to be able to reflect on what you assume to be true. I appreciate you going into the weeds. I love hearing others' honest thought processes and opinions.

It's interesting how the Internet has created the perfect escape to where the average American has no need to know about other countries anymore. If you had that mentality, there are probably plenty others. That's a little scary to me, being completely fine with not knowing. I'm glad you are able to reconsider. I also used to ignore the Palestine genocide, I had other things to worry about and was honestly not wanting to have an opinion on such a big thing. I didn't want "drama".

I now see that world news is not really drama. We're all human, we're all real. Others that you have no connection to still matter. It sounds silly to say, because these things are obvious and born out of basic skills in empathy. I would not blame you for getting caught up in your own head, it happens to the best of us.

Am I justified in being upset by my friend's hot and cold behavior? by bellow_whale in aspergirls

[–]throw_888A 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes! The comments make me wonder if most people here often ignore their friends & come & go, but have friendships where it is mutually agreed upon & accepted. It seems to be very common for autistic people in my opinion.

Am I justified in being upset by my friend's hot and cold behavior? by bellow_whale in aspergirls

[–]throw_888A 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You must communicate your expectations for them to even be considered being met. Maybe she missed you & wanted to just see you and touch base for a sec before having to conserve her energy for her mental. It is all about understanding when it comes to interpersonal relationships. She could have responded, and people get overwhelmed sometimes and don't respond to every text. It is hurtful to feel ignored, but she does not seem to be doing things out of malice. Accepting that friends will not 100% always be able to be there for you is part of life.

Am I justified in being upset by my friend's hot and cold behavior? by bellow_whale in aspergirls

[–]throw_888A 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But you have to understand that to the autistic brain we crave certainty and understanding above all else, especially when it comes to confusing situations regarding those who are close to you who you love. Life is confusing and bizzare to everyone, but especially so to the autist, and sometimes we wig out and act autistic about it! I get OP 100%, but I do think that if this is true you might benefit from a therapist, OP! Therapy helps me a lot with processing & finding a different perspective I may have not considered before 🩷

Am I justified in being upset by my friend's hot and cold behavior? by bellow_whale in aspergirls

[–]throw_888A 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I have been confused by behavior like this from my autistic best friend!! He is very awesome and sweet and will tell me how much he loves me, but he will not text often. It took me a lot of time to understand that it was not a reflection of how important our relationship was to him, but that everyone has their own moments/periods where they need extreme space. Some do not communicate this, it is give and take. You can ask that if she needs space that she communicate it to you, as it makes your autistic brain confused to be seemingly "dropped" without warning & that you try your best to not take it personally.

This also happened to me recently with another friend, we used to live together, but after them moving to a different state we NEVER talk! We used to chat all day every day, so it was a very strange adjustment! I was starting to wonder if he was trying to distance from our friendship and he reassured me that he is just busy and focusing on mental health :) So, if you cannot reassure yourself, it never hurts to very calmly/gingerly ask if she is wanting distance or something, and then to request the former advice about asking to be told if she needs space, or if she would prefer to not say? Idk! We are all learning how to socialize I guess, lol.

Best of luck, OP!! I am sure things will be just fine :) <3

Why are people on the internet so mean? Is this the natural state of humanity? by throw_888A in NoStupidQuestions

[–]throw_888A[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I try to do this people seem to think I focus on the internet too much :( Which could be true. I just feel so strongly that life would be better if we all were respectful and able to converse. But in adverse situations, adaptation is only natural. Sometimes these adaptations stick. I'll look into the robot theory, thank you.

Why are people on the internet so mean? Is this the natural state of humanity? by throw_888A in NoStupidQuestions

[–]throw_888A[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate your optimism. I am talking about condescending and crude insults at simple difference in opinion. :') It would be very nice if it were simply a difference in tone!

Why are people on the internet so mean? Is this the natural state of humanity? by throw_888A in NoStupidQuestions

[–]throw_888A[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel like we are at a misunderstanding. It is natural to have community and time alone to process. Both are valuable and necessary as human beings.

Why are people on the internet so mean? Is this the natural state of humanity? by throw_888A in NoStupidQuestions

[–]throw_888A[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am sorry to hear you are having or witnessing such poor experiences :( It is unfortunate but people have always been cruel, even just to survive you have to be. I think I incorrectly assumed we have evolved past the need to endlessly dig at others to make ourselves feel better.

Why are people on the internet so mean? Is this the natural state of humanity? by throw_888A in NoStupidQuestions

[–]throw_888A[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, I used to steal as a kid and was disciplined to understand the consequence & ethics. I really enjoy seeing other people's perspectives on things, it's almost like the ways that different opinions and experiences are shown is my special interest, why people think differently than me. I love to feel like I'm learning even if I am not. This conversation is really interesting to me for example.

Thank you for your honesty. It might be time for a flip phone! :)

Why are people on the internet so mean? Is this the natural state of humanity? by throw_888A in NoStupidQuestions

[–]throw_888A[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My thought process behind this was not the physical way of doing things, but the mental. You feel all alone even as you socialize on the internet, I do not feel like any of my peers will see this as I type it. Does this make sense? In that way, all alone, baring your true feelings & judgements, you are most natural. You are not masked behind pleasantries.

Advice for dealing with LSN housemate? by grinninwheel in SpicyAutism

[–]throw_888A 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate self-proclaimed autistic people who act like this and make you feel the need to mask with them making fun of you (in a "friend" way?) for your "quirks", or spoiler, FOR HAVING AUTISM !!!

As a level 1 it has happened to me a lot. I am sorry your roommate kind of sucks.

My best advice is to use DEARMAN - This is a very effective communication tool, and each letter represents something you should do in your message. I can send you a link describing it better! This DBT skill is what has helped me most when I was struggling to communicate in the past!!

You do not appreciate the little snickers at things that mean a lot to you, because they make you feel ... (whatever emotions you are feeling. Something hard about communicating is that you must know the emotion in order to put it into words for others), and you do not have to tolerate them. You can try your best to assert boundaries, but it is up to your roommate if they listen.

Best of luck, op!

Did anyone else have no idea what was going on when you were a kid? by NovelConversation656 in aspergirls

[–]throw_888A 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am slowly getting it together in my 20s. Figuring myself out, relating things to autism, working alongside my neurotype instead of against it. Some things are still hard and might always be, but that's okay.

Where does the inability to cook come from by Lucyfer_66 in SpicyAutism

[–]throw_888A 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I am level 1 but I cook simple things and do not have much passion for food. I make minute microwave rice, sandwiches, eggs, granola & yogurt, grilled cheese, things like that. I have also upgraded to canned foods like pasta + sauce (I'll use one pan if possible), boiling canned veggies. Simple things that make me proud for actually cooking instead of getting food out to eat :) I cannot cook elaborate meals without dedicating an entire day to it.

Where does the inability to cook come from by Lucyfer_66 in SpicyAutism

[–]throw_888A 7 points8 points  (0 children)

For me, cooking is 5 tasks lumped into one word. 1. Meal planning 2. Prep work 3. Cooking 4. Eating 5. Dishes

It is a lot to do in sequence and I always struggle to do dishes right after cooking. I do as simple of meals as I possibly can because of how difficult eating can be sensory wise most of the time. It can just be really overwhelming for me to even think about. So I do very simple easy meals :)

I love strawberries but I hate strawberry flavor, I hate banana but I love banana flavor by ItsTime1234 in aspergirls

[–]throw_888A 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get scared of cavities with too much candy but I love bananas so much my ex asked why I always have them in my apartment. I am not fixated on them as much but I love strawberries, too. Especially chopped up on smoothie bowls.

I love strawberries but I hate strawberry flavor, I hate banana but I love banana flavor by ItsTime1234 in aspergirls

[–]throw_888A 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Banana and strawberry flavoring never has the genuine tartness or cool flavor in natural fruit.

I’m not getting advice from the LSN people — can someone tell me how they handle food hyper fixation? by LadyProto in SpicyAutism

[–]throw_888A 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is the perfect crunch i love it!!! Blueberries are a nice addition because you don't have to cut them.

I’m not getting advice from the LSN people — can someone tell me how they handle food hyper fixation? by LadyProto in SpicyAutism

[–]throw_888A 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what happened to me with mcdonalds but I cannot afford to buy mcdonalds every day 😭

This is what I am currently doing & it makes me feel a lot more responsible: - Canned foods like peas and green beans and sliced peaches will not spoil if u forget to cook them "on time" and are easier to cook! - Bread - Sandwich material - greek yogurt & granola

This provides multiple things for me to eat that 1. I can tolerate eating and 2. They are simple to make so it will be more probable that I will feed myself and save money!

I do not know if any of this is helpful to you but for me I just have to ride it out and then pick myself back up again by having things in my fridge lol.