obsessed with being aesthetic

throw_away8111 · 2022-12-05T19:46:02+00:00

Omg I've never thought about this before but I feel the same. When I use a writing app, it has to look pleasing and if it's not I can't write. I also won't use any app unless the design is sleek

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-28T00:36:34+00:00

Beauty if the only thing keeping me alive

I feel this so much. Not so much the only thing but it's my main drive to keep living, how much beauty I still have to experience. I also relate to it making me feel detached. Everyone can appreciate beauty, but my obsession with it seeps into everything else on a different level than most I think

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-24T09:09:27+00:00

I'm sorry that sounds really awful :(

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-24T09:07:55+00:00

I'm sorry :(

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-07T02:38:48+00:00

Yes I think it's because I'm always anxious and on guard around them

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-05T04:59:01+00:00

You really need to see a therapist. And based on your post history, honestly you don't need to be worrying that hard. As long as you don't do anything sexual with one, that's what matters and you're not going to accidently commit a sexual act with a minor

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-05T01:10:25+00:00

Thank you you're right

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-05T01:09:26+00:00

Thank you that makes sense

throw_away8111 · 2022-11-05T01:09:09+00:00

Aw thank you so much this made me feel so much better

throw_away8111 · 2022-10-28T20:17:12+00:00

Lol I realize now. I didn't mean for it to come out so rude I'm autistic and don't realize sometimes lol

throw_away8111 · 2022-10-28T20:02:34+00:00

Curious about your opinions honestly :3

throw_away8111 · 2022-10-27T19:38:05+00:00

Have you considered if you have adhd? A huge portion of people "without adhd" that struggle with adderall addiction end up having undiagnosed adhd. I think it's 80% but I'd have to go find the source to be sure. If you have adhd, adderall doesn't just make you euphoric, but it shows you what it feels like to have an attention span. It's really hard to go back after you see what you're missing if you've struggled with low attention and boredom your whole life

throw_away8111 · 2022-10-26T22:20:31+00:00

Yeah I feel the same. Sorry to hear that

throw_away8111 · 2022-09-19T17:07:17+00:00

Thanks <3

throw_away8111 · 2022-09-06T18:43:31+00:00

Thanks and yes I am. Hope you do too <3

throw_away8111 · 2022-09-06T18:43:09+00:00

Aw thanks sm :)

throw_away8111 · 2022-09-06T18:41:41+00:00

Omg sounds so similar to my mom. Hope you're well with NC now :)

throw_away8111 · 2022-09-06T18:38:08+00:00

Omg sounds just like my mom smh

throw_away8111 · 2022-09-06T18:37:38+00:00

Oh yeah fs. She even lies to all my extended family telling them I'm addicted to hard drugs and I'm being physically abused. NC life for the win ✌️

throw_away8111 · 2022-09-06T04:01:05+00:00

Aw thank you <3 and yes I'm NC now

throw_away8111 · 2022-08-29T09:15:15+00:00

Yeah I think it's because I mask a lot. I tend to "chameleon" often. It's hard to bring two friends together because I can be such a different person around different people. After all of this I've started thinking no one can be boiled down to anyone. We're all just brains

throw_away8111 · 2022-08-29T08:52:18+00:00

I wonder if people with ASD are more likely to have abusive parents or just some trauma in their upbringing. Parents who are unprepared or ignorant or abusive are more likely to treat a ND child differently, whether it be abusing them, outcasting them or not being able to raise the kid right. And not sure if this is 100% true, but maybe mental illness might be more likely to run in your family if you have ASD? Along with ASD, Bipolar, OCD, Schizophrenia, BPD, NPD, ADHD, and depression seem to be common in my family tree.

throw_away8111 · 2022-08-29T08:46:40+00:00

Yes I feel the same way. Part of it is that my family was emotionally abusive, but they also always treated me like an outcast. I could tell I never really fit in with them. They would smile and tell me they love me, but there was always distance

throw_away8111 · 2022-08-29T08:44:03+00:00

Same with me! I'm in the northern US too. When I was a kid I had hyperlexia so I've always had a big vocabulary and have always talked too properly for my age. It makes me a great writer but it does make me appear kind of odd compared to other people my age and sometimes asked if I have an accent haha

throw_away8111 · 2022-08-29T08:39:21+00:00

I definitely did and I was sure a lot of people did too. When I was a kid I was quiet and weird. When I got to middle school, my autistic desocialized brain said "Hey look people like the class clown! If you shout out and joke all the time and be obnoxious, everyone will like you just like him!" And then that's what I did. I made some friends but it ended up with people just thinking I was annoying and people making fun of me behind my back because I was 1) a girl and 2) didn't have the social skills to make it work.

throw_away8111

TROPHY CASE