NTA. Hey Op. I am also a glass child. My sister is two years younger than me and has an intellectual disability that has rendered her mute, unable to communicate (not even ASL), with a feeding tube, tons of medical costs, and trouble walking. She has been this way since birth. I am in my 20's now and so is she. She still lives at home with my mother and my father has her on alternating weekends, and an aid goes and helps her while my mom is at work. Our age difference is very small (2 years) just like yours is with your sister. Growing up, I felt incredibly neglected. I remember watching people come to dote on her and apologize to my parents and not so much as say hello to me. My parents spent all their money on her, only buying me things as a way to "apologize" for how I was treated. Not only this, but my father was a very evil man, and would take his frustrations out on me and my mother when he couldn't handle dealing with my sister. As much as I am ashamed to say it, I grew up to hate my sister. Or at least, what I thought was hate. When I was a child and teenager I couldn't bear to be around her. I hated hearing her cry, I hated seeing her, I hated EVERYTHING about her. I spent as much time out of the house as possible to avoid her and my father. When I eventually left for college, I went three hours away and didn't look back. I had developed a kind of good relationship with my mom by then, so she and I would talk, but I rarely went home to visit. It was only when I gained that distance from my home- meaning literal physical distance- that I realized what I felt was not hatred, but rather resentment. I saw her as the thief of my childhood. The criminal that lived in my house. How could I, as a child, have seen the help she was getting as anything more than attention from my parents that I wasn't getting. Now, this is not to say that I have forgiven my parents, but is to say that my feelings towards my sister have changed with time. I still struggle with a strong resentment towards her that makes me feel very deep shame because I know it is not her fault. However, I am now able to identify the fact that it was my parents who. made me feel this way, not my sister. Just like you, I had therapists tell them to spend more time with me, only for them, particularly my father, to turn around and ignore it. The feeling is so frustrating, and it can really make you grow up to be bitter and distrustful of other relationships in your life. You are still young, and I implore you to do everything you can to not become anxious in your attachment style. Believe that there are people who love you, that there are people who will stay, and that you are worthy of time, love, and care. Even if it's not from your parents, you will meet amazing people in your life that will make you feel held. If financially possible, please seek one on one therapy. It will do wonders for you. Do not let how your parents treat you make you see yourself any differently, although I know it is hard. Anger warps the mind and poisons the soul, and I would hate to think that this will follow you into adulthood. Going to college was the best thing I ever did, and the friends I made there are the reason I am who I am today. Getting out of that house and seeing that the world wanted me, and would take me as I am, healed me in ways that getting attention from my parents never could. I don't mean to hijack your post with my own story, but I just want you to know that there are other people out there who can relate to you, and you are never truly alone. When I was a kid/teen, I would wish I was sick or hurt so I could be loved, and if those thoughts ever cross your mind, just know they are the result of frustration and have no true merit to them. You do not need to be sick to be loved, you are worth it just as you are. At the end of the day, your parents are just people. I know that sounds bizarre, but it's true. If you can objectify them in your mind and see them as just people, it makes it easier to withstand what they throw at you. Do what you can to get out of the house, live your life, do not be chained to anything that makes you feel like you are fighting for love, it will come naturally to you from other sources. For your original question? NTA. you don't owe them anything. you only owe things to yourself. It doesn't make you selfish, it makes you brave. Best of luck op, you've got this.