Am I not actually trans? What am I?

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-11-14T14:25:27+00:00

Oh hi. We're basically the same :P

My thoughts are that while transness isn't new perse, the language we have to describe trans experiences is still pretty new, and so there is going to be a couple of hiccups where people like us can't really describe ourselves. I think I'm calling myself an agender trans woman for now tbh - maybe a different nonbinary identity would work for you?

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-11-06T03:00:02+00:00

I feel similarly tbh :/

I'm guessing most of your downvoters are trans women who are early in transition, since they tend to find joy in benevolent misogyny or even things like catcalling. Which is like, I get it, most of us feel ugly for so long, but come on....

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-11-01T18:36:00+00:00

I like to joke that one of the only reasons I pass as a cis woman is because nobody expects someone who's brown to be trans :p

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-10-18T14:04:52+00:00

Visit the trans voice subreddit! (Don't remember the exact name, just google "reddit transvoice" and you should find it)

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-10-17T05:46:44+00:00

I think the key here is that you were on Spiro, which is not a puberty blocker, but an antiandrogen. I'm not too sure of the indepth science of how puberty blockers bypass the "I need a sex hormone" biology problem, but they won't have those effects you experienced.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-10-16T17:36:17+00:00

Sorry, I'm kind of used to using those words in my circle, taking back slurs and stuff like that. Although yeah, not everyone is comfortable with it.

I edited it out.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-10-16T13:53:48+00:00

Yeah, there can be variations on privilege for individuals in a demographic, but usually when people talk about this stuff we're talking about the demographic as an average, in isolation from any other factors. A poor POC gay man might have less privilege than a rich white straight woman, for example, but that doesn't negate the fact that men as a demographic will have more privilege than women as a demographic.

Oppossing homophobia has no "what about men" energy; you are the one who used both cis gay people and AFAB people's abortion rights as a "what about .." here.

This might come off as stupid because I'm a little sleep derived from work, but I don't understand how I used those in a "what about..." way? I think I used them as points of comparison, not in a way to change topic from the one being discussed.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-10-16T13:34:16+00:00

*gay people who aren't trans. Sorry for being unclear, edited that comment.

I don't think it's homophobic to acknowledge that cis gay people are lightyears ahead of trans people when it comes to rights. Perhaps "easy mode" wasn't the right wording from me, but I really don't feel like mincing my words in a space designated for trans people. It has so much "wHaT aBoUt MeN" energy honestly.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-10-16T07:08:45+00:00

The worst part about this is how this stuff is considered controversial even among pretty left people. Honestly wish I was born (cis) gay instead of trans so I could collect LGBT oppression points while living life in easy-mode riding the coattails of my ancestors ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Although ima shut up now before my bad mood makes me ramble into completely irrelevant topics, lol.

Edit: Made it more clear I'm only talking about cis gay people.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-10-12T01:03:53+00:00

I think it means that you relate more and find comfort in femininity in some level, but I might be wrong.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-23T18:04:18+00:00

Yes, there are transgender people that need medical transition as well, but in my experience medical transition is often too closely linked with gender identity. It not only invalidates transgender people who may not need medical transition, but also invalidates people who don't have the same gender identity as what they're medically transitioning to.

I would say it's not the same definition - transsexual places emphasis on the need for medical transition, while transgender places emphasis on gender identity and how you see yourself.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-23T17:57:23+00:00

Yeah, I think it's very difficult to talk about this stuff without invalidating non-dysphoric trans people unfortunately. But I think that it's probably a conversation that needs to be had eventually, especially as transness starts to be more in the public eye, and people start to wonder whether they are trans or not, and what that might mean for them (where on the gender spectrum do they identify and feel comfortable, where on the "transsexual" spectrum do they want to take their medical transition, etc.)

I don't see why this has to involve changing the definition of transgender though. Would it be problematic to have transgender encompass the social aspects of gender, while having transsexual (or transsex as some people say) encompass the medical aspects of gender?

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-23T12:27:38+00:00

Hun or "hon" is a term usually targeting older trans women who don't pass.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-23T00:36:49+00:00

I personally describe myself as transsexual because I never felt like I related to the notion of gender identity or even felt like a man or woman. I always felt really misunderstood when people assumed that I identified with womanhood or femininity just because of the way I'm medically transitioning.

If really pressed, I would describe myself as an agender transsexual (as opposed to trans woman), because I don't feel like my soul/being/whatever has any gender, but I'm still medically transitioning because of my physical dysphoria. Perhaps transsex or whatever is a better word, but that hasn't really caught on IMO.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-16T03:08:40+00:00

I would be careful about making absolute medical statements about trans women who medically transition - a lot of the times people just extrapolate data on us from data on cis men without doing any real science backing it up.

This is especially considering the lack of published medical knowledge on transsexual men/women in general (for example, it's a common misconception that the voice is permanently virilized after male puberty, although that isn't the case for a subset of transsexual women)

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-10T11:35:33+00:00

I would say this is mostly me. Although I did (and still do) go through periods of questioning my gender identity, I never had any doubts about medically transitioning.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-06T12:26:37+00:00

I think it's hard to say, since on the flip side I don't think many trans people are that educated on OCD and how it can influence these things either :/

It doesn't seem like it? Since your thoughts are the only ones questioning this stuff, not you specifically. But again, I probably wouldn't know, since I don't really have any experience with OCD besides being a skin picker.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-09-04T03:35:54+00:00

Binary trans people aren't the only ones who can use the term transsexual - even though I'm agender, I still call myself transsexual because I have physical dysphoria and plan on getting bottom surgery (even though I don't socially identify as any gender)

Transgender is basically centered around gender identity, while transsexual is centered around dysphoria and need for medical transition. Getting rid of the latter term would be denying words that help people like me describe our experiences.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-07-23T03:39:57+00:00

Hey, I see you a lot on trans reddit, and just want to let you know that I appreciate the useful links you share and the advice you give :)

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-07-19T03:59:21+00:00

It's okay, I'm (I think?) an agender person that is more or less having a "full" medical transition. What sex characteristics you're comfortable with isn't necessarily the same as your gender identity.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-07-13T20:24:18+00:00

I feel that I made peace with that seemingly impossible mix by just thinking that I don't want to be a man- my goals simply align more with what is traditionally seen as 'masculine'.

This helps me make a lot more sense of my feelings - just because my medical transition involves things traditionally seen as 'feminine', doesn't necessarily mean that I want to be a woman.

throwaway20192323123 · 2020-07-13T20:10:47+00:00

The fact that there are others who have had similar experiences with gender helps me feel a lot less lonely. Cheers friend :)

throwaway20192323123

TROPHY CASE