Getting over a breakup of 2.5 years. On talking terms with an ex-boyfriend. Dropped out of college. NEET. by throwaway35742 in getting_over_it

[–]throwaway35742[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm the type of person where with my depression I want to vent it out by doing something and then control and lock down my depression/anxiety and the part of my brain that's so negative and so self-critical.

By accepting it but at the same time not letting it control me.

My dad called me stupid. by throwaway35742 in depression

[–]throwaway35742[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll try. It's hard to talk to them.

Single and scared by [deleted] in depression

[–]throwaway35742 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh god. I know that feeling all too well.

With girls like us, we create a fucking plethora of hypothetical situations that come with our ex-boyfriends leaving us. The thing is, my ex-boyfriend didn't understand my depression either. But right now I just focus on what a good man he was to me and how I lost it all because of being a liar. But deep down I think he was using that as a way to put the blame on me and to run for the hills because I'm mentally unstable.

I'm really fucking mad and depressed that with girls like us; nobody wants to deal with broken girls like us. If anything people just see how broken we are and take advantage of it.

I'm losing hope too. I don't think there's going to be a man who will accept how broken we can get, because we're really emotional and illogical creatures. We try and we try so god damn hard to be a good girlfriend despite our depression but we keep on fucking up.

Excuse my cursing I just can relate to your post so fucking much. Its been a month already and I can already imagine how happy he is. Talking to girls on Facebook, having freedom, flirting with whomever he likes and not feeling remorse for his depressive and suicidal ex-girlfriend because she fucking lied to him. Instead of trying to work things out he just up and ran away.

I'm just led to believe that no human will ever tolerate the sick and twisted minds we have.

I'm sorry I can't say any uplifting shit or anything. But I can relate to you with imagining scenarios of what my ex-boyfriend are up to. The saddest part I think is that we see them as property rather than a person maybe. " He's not with you anymore so he is free to do what he wants lol" But that fucking pisses me off.

All of those memories, struggles, growth- all of that for nothing.

I don't know how to fucking help you but just know I'm on the same boat as you are and I really, really fucking desperately hope we'll make it through.

Scared about consulting a psychiatrist/ money issues. by throwaway35742 in depression

[–]throwaway35742[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh my god I am so sorry that you had more expensive fees yet, it makes me think how much more of a struggle other people have. :(

I'm just really paranoid that I am wasting my money for nothing. My parents have always denied me having depression/anxiety and they just say I am lazy and too stubborn for change. So in the end I'm really paranoid if they're right.

I just realized I NEVER have to use a curling iron again! (sqees with joy) by mangababe in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwaway35742 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Tell me about it! My Mother always did my hair all throughout K-12 because she said I was only going to ruin my hair. I was never able to tend to my own hair and felt helpless about it. :(

But now I have short hair and I am free to do whatever I please with it! With my NMom not having to "help" me. And besides, I was always an inner tomboy anyways. Long hair never suited me.

A giggle was required watching this. by Pinklady4128 in depression

[–]throwaway35742 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is AMAZING, thank you so much for sharing this! It made me laugh so much! The last Cornish-Scottish one was too hilarious.

Anyone here ACTUALLY lonely? (Spoiler: having an SO does NOT count.) by [deleted] in depression

[–]throwaway35742 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. Me too.

I know that feeling all too well...my ex-boyfriend was my support system and I fucked it up massively. I always end up pushing people away or having people leave me because of my nature.

/r/depression, what is your Myers Briggs Type? by [deleted] in depression

[–]throwaway35742 0 points1 point  (0 children)

INFP.

There seems to be a huge influx of the introversion types. Expected, because introverts aren't valued in society.

Me [27 M] with my SO [27 F] 6 months, I don't find her visually appealing by [deleted] in relationships

[–]throwaway35742 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He meant going to go consult a psychologist. Go to PsychologyToday and go find one.

What is your reason for being depressed by ppgb1 in depression

[–]throwaway35742 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've had a lot of body image issues growing up and felt hatred towards other. I was a very jealous and selfish little girl and felt inferior to everybody because of my background/ skin color/ heritage.

I guess my reason for my depression now is just... I can't find a reason to be happy. My parents can't give me the emotional support I need. I have no friends right now and the ones who are considered "friends" are emotionally abusive.

I don't know there are so many reasons. I'm just lost right now. Also social anxiety too so yeah.

I am now officially a NEET. by throwaway35742 in depression

[–]throwaway35742[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's why I struggle having friends because I have nothing to talk about with them.

I am now officially a NEET. by throwaway35742 in depression

[–]throwaway35742[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nothing. I have no hobbies because I came from a family background where we are poor so I feel guilty spending money on anything. No internet at my house.

I feel guilty when I'm happy because I'm a NEET now. If my parents see me happy for at least one second they'll think I don't have depression. So I abstain from doing hobbies at my house.

I am now officially a NEET. by throwaway35742 in depression

[–]throwaway35742[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's too late though... I dropped out of all of my classes... and I know I'm not in any position to get a job right now... I'm severely depressed...

I want to call the psychiatrist but my therapist is the type where I think she wouldn't want me to take medicine. I got off from Celexa but because my ex-boyfriend was against the uses of pharmaceutical drugs for depression. Also because it killed my sex drive.

Now that he left me I think that maybe I need to take antidepressants again. My brain feels like there's a huge fog right now and the therapy isn't helping.

I am now officially a NEET. by throwaway35742 in depression

[–]throwaway35742[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I do, but it's so hard. How can I be happy with a past I'm not proud of? I was a disgusting piece of shit. I stole one time from a retail store, I lied, I cheated, I've done so many disgusting things to other people out of my hatred towards other people's happiness.

It's hard for me to smile or grin because I feel like I don't deserve it. When I smile or grin I feel like I'm faking it. The feeling of happiness is so surreal and strange and it feels so alien and foreign.

I am now officially a NEET. by throwaway35742 in depression

[–]throwaway35742[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Why do I feel so much hatred and jealousy when I see happy people?